A New Beginning
by k2912p
Summary: Meredith Grey is about to experience a change that she never saw coming. Update: The story is now complete. Thank you for your patience!
1. chapter 1

A New Beginning

Chapter One

Meredith stood in Dr. Carr's home office, and stared pensively out the window. She had come to Dr. Carr a few times in her life. He helped her through some traumatic experiences, when her coping mechanisms just weren't enough. And times like this, when she just didn't know what was wrong.

She had been struggling with her feelings for a few weeks, but couldn't put her finger on what was troubling her. She was moody and irritable, and it wouldn't go away. This is where Dr. Carr came in.

"You know, this usually works better when the patient tells me what's troubling them", he urged, gently.

Without wavering from her vantage point, she answered him flatly, quietly "I thought we agreed I wasn't a patient. " Although quietly said, the affection for him was evident in her voice.

"Work the process, Meredith.". This simple statement said so much. Rather than forcing her to reveal her thoughts, it allowed her to be free to express herself, without fear of judgement. This was so very important when dealing with someone as complex as Meredith Grey.

"I'm angry" She offered.

"Angry?" The question was more probing than prompting for a response.

"Furious, actually". She turned from her reflective gaze and faced Dr. Carr. Once (and still sometimes) her therapist, she considered him as more a friend now. It was hard not to, considering all he knew of her.

"Why are you furious?"

She looked at him with a mixture of frustration and exasperation. "At Jo. Or Brooke. Or whatever." She says this last part rather flippantly.

"You know it wasn't her fault"

"I know! " She paces, then quiets. "It's not her fault that Paul came here. She had a right to try to have the life she wanted. "But Alex…" Her voice broke, then trailed off. She wiped a tear before continuing. "But Alex is destroyed. And I can't help him." She sobbed heavily, clearly very distraught. Dr. Carr crossed to her, and embraced her. After a minute, she recovered.

"Why does that make you furious? Sad, scared, sure. But why do you think it makes you furious?"

She accepted a tissue he extended to her. She pondered the question, then offered, "I can't help him. He won't talk about it. He's shut me out. Worse, he's shut the kids out. He won't come see them. He says he doesn't want them to see him like this. I don't know how to get through to him. "

"Meredith, you know better than anyone that grief is different for everyone. "

"That's not grief. She didn't die. She's in jail."

"That's not fair, Meredith. The end of a relationship needs to be grieved. He needs time."

"But he's not grieving. He's not moving on. It's like he's committed himself to being miserable because he couldn't help her. He blames himself."

"How does that make you feel?"

She gave a small laugh at this. He knew she could not stand the phrase. "It makes me Furious! We've already been through this!"

"But why?"

"Because he won't let me help him!"

Again, he said, "Why?"

More emphatically, "Because he's my person! I need to be there for him. And he needs to let me be there! He has always been there for me. I need to help him."

Dr. Carr sensed he was breaking through. He gently put his hands on her shoulders, and once more, "Why?"

She locked eyes with him, and searched herself for the answer. Suddenly, realization was upon her. Involuntarily, she gasped, shocking even herself with the relevation. Dr. Carr gave her an encouraging nod.

"Because I love him." The shocked expression remained, but mixed in was a small smile. "I'm in love with Alex!"


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

Her epiphany brought with it a swirl of emotions all at once, the weight of them seemed to press physically upon her as she sank on to the couch. She knew she loved Alex, and had for quite some time. This was not news. To be IN love with him….She did not see that coming. When did this happen? How did this happen? He was her person, her best friend. They told each other everything, both good and bad. How would this change their friendship? And if he didn't feel the same, would it ruin their friendship?

Several minutes of stunned silence had passed. Finally, Dr. Carr spoke.

"Meredith? What are you thinking?"

She let out a whoosh of air. "What am I thinking? Well, for starters, how did this happen? What the hell am I supposed to do with this? I can't tell him! But I can't _not_ tell him. How can I be myself around him now? I don't want to ruin what we have. And the kids…they love him, and if this gets destroyed, they're going to get hurt." Her voice trailed off, too many thoughts to process, much less verbalize. Despite herself, a tear slid down her cheek. She quickly wiped it away, hoping Dr. Carr didn't see, but knew he saw everything.

"Meredith, can you tell me honestly that you never thought about Alex as anything more than a friend?"

Ordinarily, she would have been quick to answer in the negative, even to laugh at the suggestion. In light of this new reality, she was forced to actually contemplate the possibility. She had never thought about Alex in that way before. Well, maybe she had _once_ , but to be fair it was in a dream induced by exhaustion. She couldn't help but to recall that the dream version of them as a couple had not ended well. That had been so long ago that it didn't even feel like she was thinking of the same person. They had been through so much together. She wouldn't be who she is today without him, and ventured that he would say the same about her if he were to be asked.

"We are very close, very comfortable together. We know each other's baggage, and don't hold it against the other. I can't imagine my life without him. I suppose that I haven't _allowed_ myself to think of him in that way." She quietly added, "we haven't had the easiest of lives, you know."

He noticed that the humor she had usually reserved for those types of statements was missing. It had always been one of her defense mechanisms, but she was unable to defend herself against this any longer. He noticed the sadness in her eyes, which would have seemed out of place for the conversation to anyone else, but Dr. Carr knew from where the sadness came.

"Derek?" The question was quiet, sympathetic. He knew her too well. She looked away and only slightly nodded in reply.

"Being in love with someone else is not betraying Derek, Meredith. You say he was your great love. He would want you to be happy." He watched her stare out the window. He knew why she was distressed. "I want you to know something, Meredith."

She took a moment to gather herself before she turned to him. "What's possible?"

He smiled at her. "To have more than one great love. Give this time. Give him time. It's ok to be happy."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

The ride home from Dr. Carr's office was a blur. She wanted to tell Alex. She needed to see him. Although the thought terrified her, she couldn't keep this from him. They didn't keep things from each other.

She turned over in her mind all of the times they had been there for each other: The middle of the night intrusions into his bed, at the expense of Jo; the time she barged in on him in the shower, when she was freaked about Derek wanting her to have babies; and when he was there for her in her darkest time, after Derek had died and Ellis was born. She marveled at the fact that he came to her, no questions asked, after she had abandoned him and ignored his pleas to simply call him. She saddened, thinking of how badly that must have hurt him.

She was trying to figure out when love turned to _in_ love. She kept coming back to one moment. She was in the hospital after being brutally beaten by a patient. She was unable to hear, but in the brief periods she was awake, she saw him. He was disheveled, unshaven and clearly exhausted. He had barely left her side, sleeping in what had to be horribly uncomfortable chairs. The greatest moment had been when he was lying in bed with her, talking to her, and suddenly realizing she could hear again. And the two of them laughed until it hurt…and did it ever hurt. But laugh they did. It was as if they had been laughing at death itself. As he held her that day, she felt safe, something she hadn't felt since Derek had died. When he had kissed the top of her head, it had sent a spark through her body. She had attributed that to the joy she felt at being able to hear once more, but it must have been that moment that he had made his way into her heart. Her head, however, would have to play catch up for a few more years. She pulled into her parking space at the hospital. Getting out of the car, she looked up at the building. This hospital represented so much to her: hope, sadness, joy, fear, safety, love, loss and legacy. Today it seemed different – bigger somehow. She locked the car and set off in search of Alex.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

She found him in the break room. His back was to her, pouring a cup of coffee. He was in scrubs, just out of surgery. It must have gone well, she could always tell just by his posture when it hadn't. Her heart leaped in her chest at the sight of him. She was taken back by the feeling, as she hadn't felt that since Derek. Not even with Riggs. She tried to conceal her feelings and went to him.

"Hey" she said. Immediately, she groaned inwardly. Her voice was strangely high.

He turned to her. Even in his sadness, he looked at her quizzically. "Hey yourself. What's wrong with you?"

She shrugged in a feeble attempt to cover. "Nothing. Just wanted to see how you're doing?" She was clearly not herself. She hoped he would let it slide. He didn't.

"You're acting weird. What's going on?"

She hoped her face didn't show how nervous she was. Why was she nervous? Just talk to him, she implored herself. Yet she found the words sticking in her throat. "I wanted to talk to you."

He grabbed a sandwich from the refrigerator. "So talk."

She had never been nervous talking to him before. In fact, their conversations came so easily. They didn't mince words, or play games. They had both had enough of that in their lives. So now this should be easy, too. But yet, the thought of saying these words terrified her. She couldn't tell him here. Quickly, she came up with something. "I miss you, Alex."

"Look, Mer, I miss you too. It's just hard, you know?" He brushed past her and sat with his lunch at the table.

She knew all too well. They had certainly endured enough loss in their lives. Enough, in fact, to last several lifetimes over. Looking at how he sat, shoulders hunched, she noticed how he seemed so far removed from the over-confident swagger of his earlier years – a swagger he did not deserve until much later, now replaced with a sadness that was almost palpable. Oh, how she wished she could take his sadness away.

"It's been almost a year, Alex. She didn't want you to be like this."

He turns to look at her, anguished. "You think I don't know how long it's been?! I know exactly how long it's been!" He turns back towards the table. "I'm sorry, Mer. I just can't think about her."

She knew she shouldn't have brought it up. The last thing she wanted was to upset him. Quickly, she tried to change the subject. "How'd surgery go?"

He didn't look up from his coffee. "Went great. No complications."

She wasn't surprised. He was an amazing surgeon in one of the most difficult specialties. She was so proud of how far he had come from when they were interns. He was a good man. He deserved to be happy. Happiness wasn't something that often came his way. She realized she had been staring at him. Fortunately, he was turned away from her and hadn't noticed. Get a grip! She implored herself. She grabbed a cup and poured some coffee. It felt like it was killing her not to tell him, but this wasn't something she could just blurt out. She sat next to him. "Can you come over tonight? I thought we could hang out. "

"Yeah, sure. That'd be great." He remembered something. Looking at her, he asked "Hey, how'd it go with Carr?"

The question she'd been dreading was upon her. She smiled. "It's complicated. Let's talk about it tonight "

He studied her for a moment. Something was off, but from past experience he knew she would tell him when she was ready.

She began to feel panicked Could he tell?

"Okay. You sure you're alright?"

She relaxed. "I'm great."


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

Meredith had spent the afternoon preparing herself for her conversation with Alex. She had practiced for the better part of an hour in front of a mirror what she hoped to say to him. It seemed so foreign to practice talking to her person. Their conversations had always been so organic, never forced. This conversation, however, would be unlike any one they had ever had before and she was desperate for it to go well. There was simply too much to lose.

She had employed Maggie and Amelia to take the kids out for the night. It wasn't a hard sell. They knew she and Alex needed some time together. He had been through so much with Jo. Reflecting on the horrible incident, Meredith conceded to herself that Jo - try as she might she just couldn't bring herself to use the name Brooke - really hadn't had a choice. She needed to be free from the abuse. She just went about it the wrong way. Shooting him in the back was hard to argue as self defense, and unfortunately the jury hadn't bought the self defense strategy. She was currently serving 20 to life. There would be appeals, Alex had told her. He would do anything for her. Hire the best attorneys, whatever it took. She had refused it all. She didn't want this life for him, she had said. He didn't deserve this. She had broken up with him. She wouldn't take his calls and refused his visits. Letters were sent back, unopened. Meredith had found herself so impressed with her. She _had_ truly loved him, a fact that Meredith had doubted at some point.

It had been nearly a year since Jo had gone to prison. Alex distracted himself with work, but personally he had not moved on. He stayed at the hospital most nights. The apartment they had shared had been sold. In fact, Meredith had sold it for him, as he had refused to go back there. He also did not go back to Meredith's house, although she had wanted him to. He needed a fresh start, he had said. This was apparently a barely furnished drab apartment in a not so great neighborhood. He could afford much better, and this was probably another way he was punishing himself. Although she hated that he was doing this to himself, she understood. It was similar to when she ran away after Derek's funeral right after learning she was pregnant. It was just too much to let anyone in. Not even Alex.

Meredith looked around. She had gone shopping, stocking the fridge with his favorite beer and snacks. She missed her friend. She loved him. And now, was _in_ love with him. They had been through so much together. Could they make it through this, too? She shivered, rubbing her arms for warmth. She always felt cold when she was nervous. Quickly, she headed upstairs for a sweater. She again replayed the practiced conversation in her head.

Her thoughts were cut short by the sound of the door closing, and then his voice. "Mer?" Again, her heart fluttered. She pressed a hand to her stomach, in an effort to steady herself. Selecting a sweater, she called down to him. "I'll be right down. Make yourself comfortable." She caught her reflection in the mirror. "Make yourself comfortable?" She repeated the phrase quietly to her reflection. "Who are you? Pull it together!" she admonished herself, and headed back downstairs.

He wasn't in the living room, so she turned toward the kitchen, and was suddenly face to face with Alex. Their closeness took the air from her, rendering her speechless. It was an awkward silence, something they hadn't before experienced. They regarded each other wordlessly for a moment. Before either knew what was happening, he gathered her in his arms and kissed her.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six

They broke from their passionate embrace after several minutes. Again, there was an awkward silence, where both just studied the other, both so careful to not let the other see their true feelings. It was she who broke first, and smiled up at him shyly.

Suddenly, his face fell. "Oh God, Mer, I'm so sorry. I- I don't know what-" he turned, and she worried he would leave. It was now or never. "Alex.."

"What am I supposed to say, here, huh?" The anguish in his voice shocked her. This was not going well. "What? What is this, some kind of sick joke?"

She wanted to stop him. This was all wrong. "Alex, please. This isn't like that!"

"Then what, Mer? What? Pity? From you?"

"Of course not, Alex! I…" she stammered. All of the things she had practiced and longed to say to him seemed to be in jeopardy of being lost, maybe forever. She took a deep breath and took a step towards him. "I – ", she sighed, the words wouldn't come out. She looked at him longingly, her hand on her chest.

He was stunned. It was all he could do to look at her. How could this be real? He didn't dare believe to be true what he thought she meant.

She stepped towards him again, cautiously. He instinctively stepped back. He wouldn't be hurt again. He _couldn't_ be hurt again.

"Alex.." but it was too late. He was gone. She tried to go after him, but he was too quick. She stood at the door, and stared into the night. She felt panicked and closed the door. She picked up her phone and called him. Straight to voice mail. "Alex, we need to talk. Please come back."

She put the phone down, worried. The kiss had just happened. Neither of them had planned it. It was a fantastic kiss, one of the best she'd ever had. But now he thought it was a pity kiss…How could he think that? She had to make this right. She picked the phone up to call him again. She had the thought of when she had run away, and the _hundreds_ of times she had rejected his call. She shivered at the memory of having had hurt him so very badly. She had to get through to him! She dialed him again. Voicemail.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

He sat in his car at the end of the driveway, stunned. Angrily, he punched the steering column. How could he have been so wrong? When he came in to the house, and she had called down to him, her voice had been different. It was a voice he had heard before, but it had never been reserved for him. He thought he had heard it at the hospital earlier that day, but now he was certain of it. He had heard that voice on many occasions when she was talking to Derek. So why was she using it on him?

He had gone to the kitchen, and was shocked to find his favorite beer in the fridge. He was the only one who drank it, and he hadn't been there in almost six months. What did this mean? She didn't usually buy him beer. He would bring it with him when he came over from time to time, but would usually just drink whatever was on hand. He was trying to process this when they bumped into each other in the kitchen. He was sure he had felt something pass between them. He had stunned even himself when he grabbed her and kissed her. He had kissed Meredith! They didn't do that!

He couldn't help thinking about the kiss. Of course he had thought about kissing her before, but had always stopped himself. Theirs had never been a romantic relationship, he had _never_ wanted to jeopardize their friendship.

There had been many times when he thought it would have been easier if he _had_ been in a romantic relationship with Meredith. He had dealt with the years of accusations of such from Jo. Despite his protests to the contrary and his proclamations of love to her, she had never fully believed that there was nothing more between them than a deep hadn't been easy to deal with, especially seeing her with that clown, Riggs. What had she seen in _him_?

His phone rang again. He saw her face, her beautiful face, on the screen and desperately wanted to answer. He reluctantly pressed decline. He reasoned with himself - she was trying to be nice, it was nothing more than that. He just wasn't ready to talk to her. He thought back to all of the times he would have been so happy to see her call, and all of the times he had waited in vain for it to come. He had convinced himself that the was wrong, but how could he have made such a mistake? He was angry at himself for misreading the situation and kissing her like that. His phone buzzed again. Again, he declined the call. He sighed deeply, resting his head against the headrest and closing his eyes momentarily. This needed to be talked about face to face, as difficult as this may be. He felt he owed her at least an explanation, even if he didn't have one to offer at the moment. He took the keys from the ignition and wiped at his face. Taking a breath, he opened the car door.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

Meredith had just pressed send on the phone to call him yet again, when she looked up. Again, her heart leapt in her chest at the sight of him. It was such a strange, yet welcome, feeling.

He stood in the doorway, unsure what to do. He looked so lost. Meredith hadn't realized how unsure of himself he had become. She stood and went to him.

"Come here." She gently took his hands and led him to the couch.

"I don't pity you, Alex."

"I know. Mer, I don't know what happened back there…"

She studied his face. There was sadness, yes, but now his eyes held a quiet desperation, a look that she knew well. He felt responsible, like he had done something wrong. She needed for him to know that this wasn't his fault. She needed to make it clear how she felt. She took a deep breath and began. "I – oh boy – I wanted to tell you earlier," she said. "This isn't something I was expecting, Alex. I just found out myself."

He looked into her eyes, studying her. She wasn't pitying him. This wasn't a joke. She was being honest! When did this happen, he wondered. After a minute, he realized. "Carr?" was all he could muster.

"Yeah", she said on a laugh, wiping a tear. "I told you, it's complicated."

"Wow." His head swirled with thoughts. She hadn't said the words, but she had said enough. He wasn't imagining it. Meredith had feelings – for him! He sat back on the couch, still holding her hands, processing this new and very unexpected turn of events. Suddenly, he felt the weight of the conversation they were having. They were each so important to the other. He needed just the right words. Finally, he sat up and faced her again. He noticed her eyes. They were once again sparkling and filled with light. He hadn't seen that in such a long time. It filled his heart with joy to see her like this, and knowing it was towards _him_ ….The feeling was indescribable. "Mer, I never thought that I would be the one to be so lucky to be here, with you. You are my rock. I never would have gotten to where I am without you. But our friendship means everything to me." He squeezed her hands for emphasis. Although he tried to keep his voice steady, emotion was too much and when next he spoke he found it cracking in spite of himself. " _You_ mean everything to me. I can't screw this up."

She wiped away a tear. A happy one this time. For all of her preparation and rehearsing, it hadn't been needed. She relaxed in the knowledge that their ability to have heart to heart conversations remained unchanged. "You mean everything to me, too, Alex. We won't let this get screwed up."

Again, they regarded each other, both smiling. He leaned in and caressed her face with his hand. He slowly pulled her towards him and kissed her passionately.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

After their conversation on the couch, they had spent the next couple of hours making out like a couple of teenagers. They stopped only when they heard the car pull up in the driveway. They hadn't wanted to stop, but did so out of necessity. It was at this point that they had gone upstairs.

It had felt strange when they went in to the bedroom, with Meredith locking the door behind them. Their activities had strictly been PG-13 to this point, but it was certainly not worth the risk of being found out.

They had sat together in silence on the edge of the bed, listening to the voices filtering up the stairwell. They heard Maggie take the two younger children in to the nursery to get them ready for bed. They heard Amelia tell Zola to go and get a book to read before bed. "Only one, Zo", she had said. They had both smiled at that. Zola would bring a stack of books if she was allowed.

Listening to this and looking over at the beautiful woman seated next to him – she really was so beautiful- brought a lump to his throat. He was literally inches from everything he had ever wanted, with the bonus of having his best friend, his person. He no longer would be forced to choose between Meredith and his girlfriend, which was a very good thing. Meredith was his choice every time.

Alex broke the silence. "I really love those kids, Mer." He had said that in the past, but there had been so much more emotion in his voice this time.

"Every relationship I've ever had has failed. Yeah, they haven't all been my fault…"she started to interrupt him, but he continued. "But some of them have been. Some of them have," he added for emphasis. "How do you know I won't screw up again?" He took a breath and said what he was most afraid of. "How do I know I won't lose you?" He grabbed her hand and looked deep into her eyes this can't fail!"

She reached over and grasped his hand. "I know," She said softly. The look of worry in his eyes tugged at her heart. She knew every woman he had ever loved had left him. Again, the memory of when she had done the same thing to him rose to the surface. She closed her eyes against the pain – the pain of having lost Derek was usually the only pain she felt at that memory, but now the pain was felt for Alex, and what she had done to him.

When she spoke, he voice was soft and sad. "When he died – when Derek died…I left you."

He recoiled at those words. He never wanted her to feel guilty or add any pain to that awful memory! He went to say something, but she held her hand up.

"It's true, Alex. I left you. Not just you, of course, everyone and everything. I know why I left, so do you. But it doesn't change the fact that I left you." She looked him square in eye. He had spent so many years avoiding the thought that she had left him, that he was no longer able to hide the tears. "I am so very sorry for leaving you. I am going to do everything in my power to prove to you that I won't ever leave you again." She hugged him tightly, desperate to relieve his pain. "Those kids? They love you, Alex. Nothing is going to change that." She squeezed him tighter for emphasis. "I promise."

He lightened at this. Meredith Grey kept her promises.

The voices in the hall had died down. It seemed the house was falling into it's bedtime routine. The new couple regained their composure.

"We're not the same people we were, Alex. We can take things slowly, learn how to adjust. I just never want to hurt you again."

He leaned in and kissed her tenderly.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Thank you to all who have stuck with this story! You all mean so much to me. I have a few more chapters planned, and I hope you stay tuned!**

* * *

Chapter Ten

Meredith awoke the next day feeling lighter than she had in years. The conversation of the previous evening still rang in her heart. Alex never ceased to amaze her. He had fully forgiven her, he had said. She wondered how he had managed to stay true to their friendship all of those years, when she did not deserve it. In true Alex fashion, he had shut her down and told her of course she had deserved it for all of the times she had been there for him when no one else was.

They talked most of the night, coming to terms with their true feelings for each other. They reviewed notes, too. How he felt when he found out about Thorpe, and how he had wanted to punch a hole in the wall when he first learned of her dalliance with Riggs. She wanted to tell him how she had felt when Jo refused his proposals, but knew better. Instead, she told him how she had felt when he was in her hospital bed after the attack, safe and loved. He told her about how he was there every day, and when he wasn't there, it was because he was needed in surgery or was up in day care with the kids. He just wanted to keep things as normal as possible for them.

She had known this – Arizona, Bailey and Maggie had all provided her snippets of Alex's heroics while she was fighting for her life. He did, however, fill her in on something she did not know about – a huge fight he'd had with Cristina.

It happened the third day after the attack. He had been calling her several times a day with updates and to find out when she would be coming. This time, she apologized but said she would not be able to come. It was a critical phase of her research. He had yelled at her that no, her friend – her PERSON – was critical! She had tried to tell him that Meredith would understand, which put him into a rage. "If she survives, Cristina! Do you not understand that? She could die!"

He had been standing in the hallway outside of her room, and the volume of his voice had steadily been rising. When there had been no reasoning with Cristina, he had angrily thrown his phone. Fortunately, Bailey was there. She had thrown her tiny but powerful body on him and held him until he calmed down. She had pulled him off of surgery for a couple of days. His only job, she had said, was to be there for Meredith.

She had been totally rocked by the reveal. Cristina had never told her.

She was roused from her musings when Alex stirred beside her. "Did you sleep well?" He murmured against her ear.

She laughed, because he knew the answer. "No!" They had stayed up until well past 4 before they slowly drifted off to sleep in each other's arms, still talking as they did.

They both laughed softly, giddy like school children, but not wanting to capture the attention of their housemates. She turned to face him.

"We keep this between us," she said, repeating the pact they had made with each other the night before.

He nodded his agreement. "Just us." He kissed her lightly on the lips. "I still can't believe that I get to do that!"

This set them into another fit of giggling. It was so strange that just yesterday morning they were friends, and now were here like this together.

"What are we going to do?" He asked her.

"What time is it?"

He glanced at his phone on the nightstand. "It's just past 6."

"Well, I think I heard Maggie getting the kids up, so they're probably all downstairs having breakfast. We should go make an appearance."

"Mer they know I'm here. You don't think they will wonder why I slept in your room Instead of the couch?"

"I'll tell them we fell asleep watching television." She paused. "You sleep over all the time."

They put themselves together and headed downstairs to the kitchen.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven

They walked into a kitchen already humming with life. The children were seated at the kitchen table, the baby in her high chair, all obediently eating their breakfast. That stopped the minute they saw that their mom was not alone. The two older children shrieked, "Alex!," while Ellis kicked excitedly in her high chair. Zola was the first to get to him, with Bailey close behind. He gathered him both in his arms in a massive hug. "Hey munchkins! I've missed you!"

Meredith watched the scene in front of her and happiness crashed over her like a wave that threatened to reveal their secret. Quickly, she looked away, and crossed to the coffee pot on the other side of the kitchen. She took down two cups and began to pour.

"You guys were up pretty late last night," said Maggie. There was no insinuation in her voice, just a statement of fact. Ever the perfectionist, she had readied herself for the day and was in the process of packing lunch for herself and the children.

"We had a lot of catching up to do," Meredith answered as casually as she could.

Amelia lounged against the counter, a cup of coffee in one hand, the newspaper in the other. "I heard you guys laughing all the way down the hall."

Meredith glanced at her, not sure what she was getting at.

"It was nice to hear that again." Amelia clarified, sincerely.

Meredith smiled gratefully at her. "Thanks again for taking the kids last night. I hope they weren't any trouble.

Amelia answered first. "Nah, Zo and I read 4 books and she went to bed without any problems."

Meredith chuckled. Amelia never just read one book, despite her admonitions to Zola to do just that.

"We had a great time, had some dinner and then we went to the trampoline park, and then got some ice cream. The little ones were out the second their heads hit the pillow." Maggie had moved on from lunches and was now putting some coffee in her to go cup. Looking up, she noticed Meredith was not ready to go.

"Mer, it's getting late! You're not even dressed!" Maggie was always ready to go, it seemed.

"I don't have to be in until 8. Bailey's doing my morning rounds." Although she was the Chief of Surgery, Miranda Bailey would take over for Meredith from time to time. It made her feel like a doctor, rather than an administrator, she had said. "I can get a ride with Alex, if you don't mind taking the kids?"

"Yeah, of course. We were going to anyway," said Maggie.

Meredith ventured to look over at Alex He now had Ellis out of the high chair in the crook of his arm, while Zola and Bailey chattered constantly to him. She watched as he planted a tender kiss on the top of Ellis's head. She picked up her coffee and took a sip in order to hide her widening smile. This felt so very right.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve

What surprised Meredith the most was how romantic Alex was. When they had been about a block away from the hospital, he had pulled the car suddenly onto a side street and parked. Before she could ask him what he was doing he leaned over and kissed her. The kiss was sweet, gentle. Afterwards, he caressed her face and told her that he just needed her to himself a little while longer.

Meredith reflected as she had scrubbed out of her most recent surgery, a duodenal ulcer repair. It had taken longer than expected due to some prolonged bleeding, but was ultimately a good outcome. She had missed lunch, and was headed for the lounge, hoping Maggie had brought an extra yogurt. The line in the cafeteria at this time of day was bound to be long, and she had to scrub in again in less than 30 minutes.

She opened the door to the Attendings lounge, and was taken back by the perfectly arranged roses in the center of the table. Trying to be nonchalant, she looked around to see if she was, indeed, alone. She sidled up to them, and strained her neck to read the card. Just as it came into focus, she heard him chuckle behind her. "Yeah, they're for you!"

She spun around and faced him, her face red with embarrassment. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have thought…"

He stopped her. "What? That your boyfriend might have bought you flowers? Well, he did. Read the card!"

She glanced toward the door quickly to make sure they were still alone. Carefully, she extracted the card from the bouquet. Opening the envelope, she couldn't help but laugh. "From your secret admirer! Clever!"

He grinned. "Yeah, I thought of it last night when we were discussing keeping this secret. I couldn't resist."

She pulled him off to the side, away from the door and any potential on-lookers, and kissed him quickly. "Thank you. They're beautiful – and completely unnecessary, you know that, right?"

This time it was he who glanced around to ensure their privacy was not interrupted. "Mer, I'd fill this whole damn hospital with flowers for you."

She threw caution to the wind and kissed him deeply.


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Thanks again for the follows, favorites and reviews. I read them all, and thank you from the bottom of my heart!**

* * *

Chapter Thirteen

As Alex stood waiting for the elevator, he couldn't help to think to himself what a difference a day makes. To think that just twenty four hours prior he was broken, resigned to living the rest of his life alone, never getting his happy ending - never getting _his_ post it. And now, well he just couldn't be happier.

He was still smiling when the elevator door opened revealing Arizona, who flashed him one of her famous big smiles.

"Hey!" She greeted him in her usually chipper manner.

He turned and faced forward. "Hey yourself."

After a beat, Arizona ventured, "So, you gonna tell me who she is?"

Alex continued to look forward, but answered her, sounding annoyed. "Who what is?"

"Oh, come on, Karev! It's so obvious! You met a girl! Trust me, I should know!" She cajoled him.

"Come off it, Robbins." He is glad to be facing forward. He can feel the heat in his face and a smile twitched at the corner of his mouth, which threatened to break free.

" _You_ come off it, Karev! I heard you this morning…whistling!"

"Leave it, ok?" He grumbled.

" _Whistling_!" Then added emphatically, " _You don't whistle_!"

"Seriously, will you drop it? I did not meet a girl." This was true. He had known Meredith for years. "I'm just in a good mood…which you're ruining, by the way!"

They rode together in silence for another moment.

"I'm not gonna drop it, Alex. There's a girl. I just know it!"

Just then, the elevator doors opened, and he quickly ducked out. It was going to be difficult working with Arizona, and he had the misfortune of scrubbing in on a surgery with her later that day. She really did know him well.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter Fourteen

Meredith was a couple of hours into surgery with Maggie and April. The patient was an unfortunate victim of a gun shot wound to his chest and abdomen. As the three worked to repair the damage, they talked. The current topic of conversation, much to Meredith's chagrin, were the roses in the break room.

"I wonder who they're for", Maggie wondered out loud.

Meredith focused intensely on the liver repair she was doing, so much so that she hadn't heard April say her name.

"What? Sorry." Meredith said.

April repeated herself, "I said they were for you…the roses…I saw your name on the card."

Meredith felt her face redden beneath her surgical mask. Hoping to divert the conversation, she asked, "April does the liver look a little patchy to you?"

April leaned in to get a better visual. "No. Who are they from?"

Clearly, she was not going to drop it. "I don't know", Meredith snipped. "The card just said from your secret admirer."

Both Maggie and April awed over that tidbit.

"Do you think they're from a patient?", mused April.

"No, patients always say who they're from. This is something else...Maybe it's the new Ortho fellow?"

Meredith rolled her eyes , thankful for the anonymity proved by her mask.

Suddenly, Maggie sucked in some air. "Wait. Mer, you _do_ know who they're from!"

"I do not know who they're from! That's why it's called a _secret_ admirer!" Meredith was desperate for them, especially Maggie, to drop the subject. Maggie knew Alex stayed at the house last night - in her room. If she connected the dots...

"Yes you do!" By way of explanation, Maggie turned to April and said, "she's happy."

April looked at Meredith, eyes wide. "Oh my gosh, Meredith! Who is he?"

Meredith did her best annoyed Meredith voice, "There is no one! Now can we please get back to work? And I'm not happy!" She shot her sister a very irritated look.

"She's happy." Maggie repeated to April, matter-of-factly. Meredith rolled her eyes.

"I think it's great, Mer. You deserve to be happy. In fact, there must be something going around! Arizona said the same thing this morning about..." April did not finish the sentence. She immediately understood the dagger like stare coming from Meredith. If she finished that sentence it may very well be her last!

Meredith looked quickly away and tried to make it look like she was focused on her work, but she could feel April's eyes upon her. "Liver repair is done. You got this from here, April?"

"Yeah, he should be good."

Without glancing at April, Meredith left the room and began to scrub out.


	15. Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Fifteen

April exited the scrub room to a waiting Meredith, who grabbed her by the arm, pulling her towards her as they went.

"We need to talk. Now." Her voice belied her anxiety at having their assignation discovered.

"Mer, I…."

"Not here." Meredith pulled her down the hall into a supply closet and closed the door. She faced April, and crossed her arms over her chest. She considered the woman across from her a friend, even a good friend. She had shared with April from time to time, but usually only in moments like this, when necessary. April had a way of accidentally finding out Meredith's secrets, which, to April's credit, she kept. However, she needed to make sure this secret stayed secret.

"April…" she began.

"You and Alex!" April hissed excitedly.

"No! Well, yes…

"Oh my gosh! This is amazing! Mer…."

"April! Stop! I need you to let this go." She took a deep breath, and relented. "It's new, it just happened. We are not ready to tell anyone. We're still figuring it out. I need you to keep this secret. Please."

April studied her face. The desperation in her eyes was evident. She nodded vigorously. "Of course, Mer, of course I'll keep your secret."

"Do you think Maggie realized what we were talking about?"

"Oh. No, not at all. She was doing the pericardial patch. You know how she gets." Maggie had the ability to laser focus, nothing else mattered when she was in the thick of it in the OR.

Meredith breathed a sigh of relief. "Okay, thanks." As she turned to leave April stopped her.

"Meredith? Can I just say one thing?"

Meredith turned wordlessly to her, eyebrows raised in anticipation.

"It's a gift," she said softly. "Being more than friends with your best friend. A wonderful gift. I know I'm not the one you'd be inclined to share with, but if you ever need to talk, I'm always here, I get it. I'm really happy for you both."

Meredith stared at her for a beat. April's words had touched her. At a loss for words, Meredith reached out and gave April a quick hug before disappearing through the doorway.


	16. Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Sixteen

Alex hesitated just outside the door to the scrub room. As he looked inside, he groaned inwardly. He had spent the better part of the day avoiding Arizona – and whistling. Now, he had no option but to face her. Resigned to this fact, he took a deep breath and pushed through the door.

Immediately, he was hit with one of Arizona's grins. In an attempt to gain the upper hand, he spoke first.

"We're not doing this again."

Arizona glanced at him, feigning innocence "Do what?"

"You know what…the little chat we had in the elevator." He started scrubbing in for the surgery. He kept his head down, but he felt Arizona's eyes upon him. "Can we just focus on fixing this kid?"

She didn't reply. He ventured a glance at his friend. She had that look on her face – the one that said she will get what she wants. She really was like a dog with a bone. He had to shut it down.

"I'm not going to talk, so don't start." Unfortunately for Alex, this only fueled her fire.

"I knew it, Karev!"

"You don't know anything , okay?" He put on his best "don't mess with me" face, and tried his hardest to sound irritated, but it was to no avail.

"Come on! Give me something! I won't tell, I swear!"

He chuckled at this. "What are we back in elementary school?"

She was growing impatient. "Come on! I need something…anything….is she hot?"

Alex could no longer contain his smile. "She's the hottest." After a minute, he added, "Arizona, just...Don't say anything, ok? We are not going public…yet. And if you hear any gossip…"

She could see he was genuinely worried about this getting out. After all he had been though, it was wonderful to see him smile again. "If I hear any gossip I'll shut it down."

He smiled gratefully at his friend.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter Seventeen

It was several hours later when he finally was back in the Attendings lounge, having just updated the little girl's parents on the successful surgery. As he entered the room, he wiped his face, as if trying to wipe the tiredness he felt away.

She was there, already changed to go home. She sat on the couch, lacing up her sneakers. She had taken her hair down, and a stray strand had fallen across her cheek.

He stood there for a moment, taking her in her beauty. He still could not believe that she had chosen _him_. As he stood in his incredulity, she looked up at him and smiled widely. "Hey! How'd it go?"

It was a standard greeting they'd given each other hundreds, if not thousands, of times before. This time was no different, but yet so very different.

"Uh, great…" he stammered, trying to regain his composure. "We had to defibrillate, but, uh, yeah, she's going to be fine." He started towards her, his only thought to kiss her, but it was then that the door opened and they were no longer alone in the room. April had joined them.

She was clearly flustered. "Oh, hi, sorry, I'll come back…" she started blabbering.

Meredith's voice called softly, "April, it's ok. You can stay."

Alex looked questioningly from Meredith to April, who now had a dopey grin on her face.

"Alex, April knows.", he heard Meredith say.

Before he could process what she was saying, April started rambling nervously. "And I think it's great, you two…it just makes sense."…

He didn't hear her. His focus was all on Meredith. She looked so beautiful, smiling at the scene before her. He couldn't wait any longer. He crossed to her, leaned down and kissed her.

When they broke from the kiss, he saw that April had left the room. "Geez if I knew it would've gotten rid of Kepner , I would have started kissing you a long time ago," he teased.

This brought a laugh from Meredith. She watched as he crossed to the cubby, hanging his lab coat. He took off his scrub top, and pitched it in the hamper. She had seen him do this countless times, but this time, she let her gaze linger. Her eyes moved up and down his torso, and when he turned toward her, she noticed anew the scar. She felt a lump form in her throat and tears stung her eyes. She had not thought about that day in a very long time. She hadn't needed to – she had had many more days – worse days – to occupy her thoughts. But in this moment, that day crept it's way back in. She had seen the scar many times before, had even teased him about it on occasion. This wasn't about the scar. It was about what it represented: all of the loss in her life, and how she had been so close to losing yet another important person to her. "Oh, Alex…." She had said it so softly that she wasn't sure he had heard her, but he had.

He knew from the look on her face that she was remembering that day. That awful day which they had worked so hard to forget. Quickly, he jammed his shirt over his head, to cover that heinous reminder, and went to her, enveloping her in his arms. "Shhh," he soothed her. "That's in the past. We're okay." He rocked her gently, kissing the top of her head. After a few moments, she spoke.

"I almost lost you." The words were said on a whisper, almost too painful to be verbalized.

Instinctively, he tightened his grip on her. "You didn't, though. I'm here. I'm here, and we're here, and we're okay. We're survivors, Grey. We're the lucky ones."

She laughed, softly at first, then dissolved into full blown hysterical laughter, which Alex soon joined in. They were the lucky ones? It would have been absurd if it wasn't so very true.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter Eighteen

They walked in the door a little past ten. The nanny had already fed the children and put them to bed. She didn't use the nanny often, only when she knew she would be too late getting home to give them a normal night of dinner , homework and bedtime stories. She didn't like that she wasn't the one there with them, but she also knew she wasn't her mother.

They had gone upstairs to check on the children, all sleeping soundly. Maggie and Amelia were not yet home, nor were they expected anytime soon. Amelia was preparing for a difficult tumor removal, and would probably be working straight through the night in the skills lab Maggie had just started phase two of her clinical trial, determined not to be the only daughter of Ellis Grey to not win a Harper Avery.

Alex and Meredith retreated into her room, and took their usual places on her bed. They sat there like that in silence for a few minutes, the only sound was the soft snoring coming from the baby monitor which she had switched on upon entering the room.

He reached over and took her hand in his, absentmindedly playing with her fingers. He could no longer hold back the question that plagued him from a few hours earlier. "Kepner?" He turned his head to watch her reaction.

She threw her head back and laughed, knowing this was coming. She then explained the events that led up to the reveal, and April's promise to keep their secret.

"Arizona kind of knows, too." He continued before she had a chance to respond. "She, uh, caught me whistling this morning, and she says I don't whistle."

Meredith was grinning. "No, you do not!"

"Well, she – You know how she is- she said she knows that I 'met someone' and kept pestering me for details. "

"What did you say?" Her eyes danced playfully, eager to hear what he had told his mentor.

"I didn't tell her it was you, but she wanted details, so I, uh,…" he is suddenly shy, looking down. "I said you were hot…the hottest, actually. He slowly lifted his head to look at her. She had that look on her face again. The same look from last night. The look she had used to give Derek. This same look that now made him go weak in the knees. It had been a few minutes since he had revealed the contents of his conversation with Robbins, and she hadn't said anything. Finally, he could take it no longer. "Mer, what are you thinking?"

"Right now, I'm thinking that Izzy was a fool to have ever left you."

Now it was he with tears in his eyes. His failed marriage to Izzy was the greatest source of disappointment in himself, something he had blamed himself for. Now, here was the greatest, bravest most beautiful woman he'd ever met telling him that she had been wrong. He gathered her in his arms, and she laid her head on his chest. He felt safe with her, something he had never felt before. He relaxed against the headboard, relishing the feeling of her head on his chest, the feeling of being home.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter Nineteen

He woke up alone a short time later, after having once again fallen asleep in her bed. Softly, he called for her. "Mer?" But there was no answer. Instant panic bubbled up inside of him, worried that she had suddenly realized this was a mistake and left. Fortunately, his concern was short lived, as he heard her voice over the baby monitor. Relieved, he grabbed his shirt from the chair he had placed it on last night, and went to the nursery.

She sat there in the dark, the small nightlight casting a soft glow around her. She was in the rocking chair, Ellis in her arms, singing softly. Bailey was sound asleep in his bed on the other side of the room. She looked up as he walked in.

"She has a fever," whispered Meredith. "102.6 axillary temp."

Concerned, he came in to the room and started examining the small child. Taking her from Meredith, he laid her gingerly on the changing table and carefully removed her clothes.

"Belly feels soft, non-tender. Do you have your stethoscope?"

"Yeah," she whispered, as she handed it to him. "I already checked. Lungs sound clear. No rales or wheezes."

"That's good, but I need to hear for myself. " He put the stethoscope to her chest, listening carefully, tapping out her heartbeat with his fingers. He then moved the scope to her belly and listened again. Ellis squirmed slightly under his touch, and he leaned down and kissed her forehead. "It's okay, baby girl. You're okay," he murmured to her. He turned back to Meredith. "Do you have your otoscope?"

She reached in to her doctors bag, which was at her side, and extracted the instrument. "I was about to check when you came in. Do you think it's another ear infection?" She asked, worriedly.

He took the instrument and carefully pulled the still sleeping child's ear back and down. Ever so gently he inserted the probe, yet was met with near instant cries from the child regardless. Looking through the viewer, he nodded. "Definitely. Poor kiddo." He extracted the probe, and switched deftly to the other ear with the same results. "Bilateral Otitis Media," he said expertly. "This is what, her third round in 8 months or so?"

"Yeah, that's about right," she said, surprised that he remembered when her child had been ill.

"I think she's going to need tubes, Mer."

She sighed anxiously. The thought of her child having surgery was distressing. She began to gather the medications she would need to administer. She took out a bottle of powdered amoxicillin from her bag, along with a bottled water she kept in there for this purpose. She checked the expiration date on the medication, then carefully measured out the exact amount of water needed to reconstitute the mixture. She recapped the little bottle, shaking it vigorously.

Alex had redressed his little patient, and was rocking her in his arms, soothing the sick girl. Meredith drew up the dropper, watching him with Ellis as she did so. She was suddenly struck by how easy this was, having a second set of hands, how the two of them were able to take care of the baby so well and had managed not to wake the sleeping Bailey a few feet away. Yes, they were trained for this, and Amelia and Maggie always helped as well, but this was different. He came without needing to be asked. In fact, he was sleeping soundly when she had left the room. It was almost as if he had sensed that he was needed.

Meredith marveled at how when she administered the medicine to Ellis, instead of fussing or crying as she usually did, the toddler simply snuggled into Alex. As she stood with the two in the dim light of the room, she put her head on his shoulder and sighed, an odd mix of contentment and worry. As if he could read her thoughts, he kissed her forehead. "She'll be fine, Mer. I got her."

Meredith nodded. "I know. It's just hard when it's your kid." She stayed like that for another minute. "I'm going to put this in the fridge," motioning to the antibiotic. "Do you want any thing while I'm up?"

He looked from the sleeping child in his arms back to her and smiled. "Nah. I have everything I need."


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter Twenty

When Meredith was back upstairs, she found Bailey sleeping alone in the nursery. She adjusted his covers and gently kissed his head. She left the room, and went back to hers. Alex had placed Ellis next to him on the bed, and was intently watching her. He looked up when Meredith entered.

"I hope you don't mind, but I'd feel more comfortable having her close tonight, and I didn't want to wake Bailey."

"Of course not." She climbed into bed, the sleeping child between them. "I'm surprised she let you put her down. Do you really think she's going to need tubes?"

"We have some time before we have to decide. Usually it's done if there are three infections within six months or five in a year. This is her third in eight months, so she's pretty close to that." He could see the worry on her face. He reached over and squeezed her hand. "She'll be fine, Mer. Get some rest. I got her."

He said it in a way that comforted her, but also left no room for argument. She looked from the baby to Alex. He had helped her on several occasions when the kids were sick – this was nothing new. This time, however, she noticed something more. He was always attentive to the kids, but this time he looked more like a doting father. His love for the sweet child was evident in the way he brushed his lips to her forehead, and gently stroked her blonde ringlets. It was there in the little smile he gave every time she made a noise in her sleep. She had always known he loved her kids. He took pride in the fact that they loved him more than their own mother, as he would say. However, she never before saw him look at them quite the way he was looking at Ellis now.

She had to know – she had been wondering since he said it when they were in the nursery. "How did you know it was her third ear infection in eight months?"

He looked up at her and smiled. "What?"

"In the nursery...you knew it was her third infection in eight months. I barely remember telling you when she had them."

He flicked his gaze to his little patient, sleeping peacefully, back to Meredith. Briefly, he allowed himself to remember when he thought he would never have this. Back to when he thought he didn't deserve this. Now, he no longer needed to cover his feelings. He was able to tell her what he was sure she already knew. "Because…you remember important things like that about your family. You and the kids _are_ my family." He smiled shyly at Meredith. It felt good to finally be able to acknowledge that in it's true meaning – not just as his person, bequeathed to him upon Cristina's exit.

She knew this to be true – and it had been true for some time. She felt something bordering on sadness for not having acknowledged it sooner – for making him feel that he had to water down his love for her kids. As she lay there, she studied his face. The deep worry lines formed over the past year were softening. His eyes were no longer dark and sad, but rather sparkling.

As she lay there examining him in this new light, he caught her gaze. She wanted to say something, but thank you and I love you did not seem enough. "You're our family too, Alex. And you always will be."


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter Twenty-One

Meredith opened her eyes to the sun streaming through her blinds. She grabbed her phone off of the nightstand and checked the time, shocked to discover it was after 7. It was Saturday and they were both off today. She saw that Alex and Ellis were gone, and she got up in search of them. She checked in the nursery and saw Bailey was no longer in there, either. Suddenly, she could hear the children laughing downstairs, and followed the sound.

Alex was in the kitchen with all three children. Ellis was in her high chair, eating a waffle. Zola and Bailey had chairs pushed up to the counter while Alex helped them mix and pour batter.

Meredith went to Ellis, who was all smiles. "Good morning! Are you feeling better?" she asked, feeling her forehead.

"Morning, Mer. Yeah, her fever broke around 4. I just gave her the next dose of Amoxicillin. And now, we're having waffles!" He announced the last part excitedly, with the older kids giggling.

"Mommy, Uncle Alex is helping us make waffles…with chocolate chips!" exclaimed Zola.

"I help, too!" Bailey chimed in.

"You do?!" Meredith exclaimed, tousling his hair. She kissed both older children on the head. "And did Uncle Alex get any sleep last night?" she asked him in a sing song voice, gently caressing his arm.

"Careful, Zo, don't pour too much," he warned before answering Meredith. "I closed my eyes for a bit. I'm fine."

"Seriously, thank you for last night. You were amazing."

"Woah, what did I walk into?!" exclaimed Amelia.

Meredith turned, surprised by Amelia's entrance. "I thought you were staying at the hospital last night?" she said, attempting to dodge the question.

"Yeah, I can see you weren't expecting me!" inferred Amelia.

Meredith was exasperated. "The baby was sick. Alex took care of her all night." She saw her sister-in-law's worried expression. "She's fine. Double ear infection, again." She offered, by way of explanation.

Relieved, Amelia studied the scene in front of her. They were back to playing happy family again, it seemed. She felt a momentary pang of sadness as she thought it should be Derek here, helping make breakfast. She tried to push the thought aside, but the pain bubbled up regardless. She felt herself grow angry at the Rockwell-like scene before her. She knew it was irrational, but something had set her off. Meredith had called Alex amazing. Why? He took care of sick kids all the time, it was his job. What made this time so amazing? She grabbed a cup and poured out some coffee.

Alex stiffened. He could feel the anger coming off of Amelia. He needed to diffuse the situation. He didn't want the sisters to fight, especially in front of the kids. He leaned over and whispered something to Zola.

"Aunt Amelia, would you like a waffle?" the eldest child asked her.

Amelia sighed. "No thanks, Zo zo. I actually have to get back to the hospital."

"But they have chocolate chips!" chirped Bailey.

Once again, she regarded the picture perfect scene before her. Settling her gaze on Meredith, she quipped, "I bet they're _amazing_." She then quickly left the room.

Alex and Meredith stared at each other for a beat. "What's with her?" Alex asked.

She shrugged. " I'm not sure. Let me go talk to her."

Alex returned his attention to the waffles and the children, while Meredith went off in search of Amelia.


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter Twenty Two

She found her upstairs, in Amelia's room. She was pacing, as she was prone to do when she was upset. Meredith entered the room and sat down on her bed.

"You want to tell me what that was all about?" Her voice was soft, but no nonsense.

Amelia continued to pace for a moment before looking at her. "Look, I know I was wrong. But…do you see it? I mean, do you _even_ see it?"

Meredith was confused. "See what, Amelia?"

Amelia had stopped pacing and stood, facing Meredith. Her eyes were moist, ready to spill tears at any second. "You're down there playing happy family," she waved her arms in the air for emphasis. "And it's _great_. It's great that you have your friend who helps out with the kids and is _amazing_ ," she continued. "But my brother is dead. And sometimes, God help me, Meredith, sometimes it's just too damn much! And all I can think is 'why isn't it Derek?'"

Meredith looked down at her hands. She understood, too well, Amelia's pain. "I know." Her reply was soft, and she didn't look at Amelia when she said it. She understood how this pain could come out of nowhere. It was like hot embers that just needed to be stoked to be turned into a roaring flame. She looked up at her sister-in-law, who had tears flowing down her cheeks. They didn't always get along, but she did love her. She patted the bed beside her. Amelia, after a moment, rolled her eyes, but obediently sat beside her.

Gently, Meredith pulled her into her side, and Amelia rested her head on her shoulder. As if answering a question that hadn't been asked, she said, "I don't know if the pain ever goes away, Amelia, _really_ away. But I do know that Derek would not want you to feel like this. Not for a minute. He would want you to move on. He would want _us_ to move on. To live our lives."

The two sisters remained together for several minutes. The sound of laughter again filtered up the stairwell. Amelia looked up in time to see Meredith smiling. It was then that she understood why she had become upset downstairs. Her sister was moving on. She opened her mouth to say something, but thinking better of it, she closed it. She snuck another glance at Meredith. She looked…peaceful. For the first time in years, there was a peacefulness that had not been there before. Amelia found herself smiling in spite of herself, and hugged in to Meredith a little tighter.


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter Twenty Three

It was later in the day. Alex and Meredith were at the park with the kids. Zola and Bailey were feeding the ducks in the pond, throwing seeds out to them and laughing joyfully when they would peck at them. Ellis slept soundly in the stroller next to them. They sat side by side on the bench, each sipping coffee out of cardboard cups.

"You know what's weird?" ventured Meredith.

"That you can't cook?" he teased.

She laughed. "Cut it out. I can too cook."He simply raised an eyebrow at her. "Okay, fine, I can't cook. Seriously, is it weird that this isn't weird?" She gestured in a circle, clearly meaning them as a family.

He considered this for a moment. "No, I don't think so. I think it would be weird if it _felt_ weird."

She chuckled. You're starting to sound like me, Karev."

He grinned. "It's just…this is what we do…what we've done for so long. I just mean that….it would be weird if it felt weird!" he found himself repeating, which caused both of them to laugh heartily.

"Guys, you're getting too close to the edge. Come back this way!" Meredith called to the kids after they had taken a couple of steps forward. Seeing them step back, she again relaxed. They sat in silence for a bit.

"Have you been thinking about…" his voice trailed off.

"About…" she repeated.

He gave her a shy smile. "You know." He suggestively raised his eyebrows at her and chuckled.

Her eyes widened in understanding. "Oh!" She smiled back. "Yeah, I've been thinking!" she admitted, her face reddening. They looked at each other and laughed nervously. This was new to her. She thought back to her previous relationships. It had always been sex first, friendship after. Now here she was, with her very best friend, getting ready to make the transition into more than friends. The thought both terrified and excited her. She knew the time was right for them to take the next step.

She watched the children playing, then glanced at her watch. "Maggie is staying at the hospital again tonight. Amelia will be there late. I feel an early bedtime coming on for these guys. What do you think?"

He looked at her, his pupils dilated in excitement. "I think an early bedtime sounds perfect."


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter Twenty Four

An early bedtime had turned into nine thirty. The kids were all very excited that Uncle Alex was spending the whole day with them, and they had a lot they wanted to do! They had pizza, played games and had watched a movie.

For Alex and Meredith, it was an evening that had been fraught with meaningful glances, hands 'accidentally' brushing against the others and shy, longing smiles.

Finally, the kids were calming down and sleep seemed possible. Meredith had taken Zola for a shower, and Alex had given Bailey and Ellis a bath. They had read stories, tucked each child in and had finally gotten them to sleep. Alex had just finished putting Bailey to bed and had entered Meredith's bedroom.

Earlier in the day, they had retrieved clothes and toiletries from his apartment. He had taken a shower before dinner, and was wearing plaid pajama bottoms and a gray top.

Meredith stepped out of the adjoining bathroom, having just showered. Her hair, still wet, hung loosely over her robe as she rubbed it with a towel. She stopped when she saw him.

The two stood, stationary, breathlessly, as they regarded each other. Simultaneously, the took their first timid steps towards the other, gradually picking up the pace until they were in each other's arms.

He kissed her, apprehensively at first, then deeply. He felt her respond to him, and scooped her up in his arms, carrying her to the bed. He laid her down gently. They wordlessly studied each other for a moment, as if to double check that this was happening. His pupils dilated with passion as he reached down to undo her robe. As he released the knot holding it closed, his eyes never left hers.

As if giving him permission, she pulled him in close. They kissed softly at first, easing in to their new roles. Before long, the kiss had become more urgent. They began to explore each other. Frantically, lovingly their bodies became one.

Several hours later, they lay there, a tangle of sweat, sheets and bodies. It was better than either had dared to imagine as they lay in the dark holding each other, knowing that this was not a mistake. This was meant to be. They were safe in each other's arms.

As their breathing slowly returned to normal, Alex thought for all they had been through together, he had never allowed himself to dream that this is where they would end up. His fears from earlier in the week now seemed so long ago. He thoroughly searched her face for any signs of regret. Finding none, he smiled. That these two people who were so damaged and broken could find each other - could make each other happy - was nothing short of miraculous, he thought. He moved a stray hair out of her eyes as she let out a contented sigh. "I love you, Meredith."

She never thought she would hear those words again after Derek had died. And then she had thought she could never let anyone else in. To get to this point, she thought, was a testament to the love she had shared with Derek. That she could once again open her heart and let someone in was miraculous - it's the only word to emphasize just how unlikely this had been. She broke into a wide grin, and with tears in her eyes told him, "I love you too, Alex."


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter Twenty Five

Meredith rolled over and looked at her phone. It was three a.m. Quickly, she calculated that it was noon in Zurich. She had been watching Alex sleep for the better part of an hour, trying to not freak out.

She didn't understand the cause of her freak out. This is what she had wanted, and did not regret it at all. A part of her wanted to wake Alex and tell him she was freaking out, but she couldn't bear the thought. She needed to handle this on her own. However, she was going around in circles, so clearly help was needed. This left one option.

She grabbed her phone and quietly slipped out of bed. Glancing back at Alex to make sure he was still sleeping, she very carefully closed the door behind her, and made her way down the stairs.

The living room was dark and quiet. She switched on a small light and dialed.

"Oh hey Mer! Wait until you hear what we're doing…"

"Cristina! I don't have time. I need your help! I'm freaking out" She whispered sharply.

Cristina chortles. "What did you do? No, who did you do!"

"I need to tell you something, and I need you to be supportive." Meredith begins.

"Okay. I'm being supportive."

"Seriously, Cristina!"

"What? Okay, Mer! I'm being seriously supportive."

Meredith took a deep breath. "I did something."

"Okay…"

"Something huge. And now I'm freaking out about it. And the thing is, I don't want to be freaking out about it, because this thing I did, I really want it to work..."

"Did you…." Cristina starts to guess, then realization hit her all at once. "Did you have sex with _Alex_?!"

"How did you….yeah." Meredith listens for a second. Silence. "Cristina?" Sudden hysterical laughter floods the line.

"Cristina! Stop laughing! It isn't funny!" Meredith intones sharply.

Cristina tries to talk through her laughter. "Wait a minute, wait a minute wait a minute….so, you mean to tell me you made it through your slutty intern phase, your dirty mistress phase and your sleeping with inappropriate men phase, and _now_ you're sleeping with Alex?! Good job, Mer! You almost made it!" She dissolves into another fit of laughter.

"Will you cut it out?! I'm in crisis!"

Slowly, Cristina calms down. "Sorry, _now_ I'm being supportive. Why are you in crisis?"

"I don't know. It was amazing, Cristina. Seriously amazing. And we said I love you. And we fell asleep together. And then I woke up and I'm freaking out! Help me!"

Cristina was silent for a minute. Her voice was completely different when she next spoke. "You love each other? Like _really_ love each other?" She was incredulous.

"We really do." Meredith said quietly.

"Who would have guessed…Evil Spawn!"

"Don't call him that, Cristina. He's an amazing man."

"Then why are you freaking out?" Cristina questioned.

Meredith hesitated, as if afraid to say the words out loud. "Because it's the first time since Derek that I've said that."

Cristina was once again silent for a moment. She recognized that this was a huge moment in her friends life. "Then I think you should take a minute to freak out. It's okay to freak out for this. But only for a minute. Because Mer, I really think this could be a great thing."

Meredith smiled. "I do too, Cristina. Thanks."


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter Twenty Six

Meredith quietly opened the door to the bedroom, feeling much calmer since her talk with Cristina. She cautiously slipped back in to bed, being careful not to wake Alex. She settled into position, and rested her head on the pillow.

"How's Yang?"

Startled, she turned to him. "She's fine. How did you…"

He interrupted her, a wry smile on his face. "Because if it was anyone else here, you'd be in my bed freaking out."

They both chuckle at the truth. "I'm not freaking out." She sighed. "Well, Not any more." She smiled. "Don't worry. We're fine ."

He rolled over to look at her. "I know we're fine. I want to know if _you're_ fine. Look, Mer, I know you haven't told anyone you love them since Derek. I can only imagine how that feels."

She's caught off guard and begins to tear up. "Yeah," she says quietly.

He takes her into his arms, kissing her head. After a few quiet minutes, he spoke. "I think – if it was me - I'd freak out a little too. I'm sure things like this will come up from time to time, but you can talk to me. I won't get upset or have my feelings hurt." He pulls back to look at her. "I will never try to replace Derek, Mer. And I am always going to be here for you. We can't let our new relationship change what we have. You need to dump on me? Go ahead! I can take it. But don't ever feel that you have to hide anything from me. You not talking to me? I can't take _that_."

She was openly crying, touched by the complete selflessness that was Alex Karev. After a moment, she recovered. "I want you to know, Alex, that I really do love you."

He grinned at her. "Yeah, I know. And I really love you too. Now, how bout we find something else to keep us up at night?" They both laugh as he leaned in to kiss her.


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter Twenty Seven

The next morning, Alex and Meredith were in the kitchen. He was once again making breakfast, while she was relegated to non-cooking duties like setting the table and pouring juice.

The kids chattered happily, the two older ones once again helping Alex. Meredith was putting the baby in her high chair when Amelia and Maggie walked in together. Meredith tried not to look surprised, but she really had not expected them home the previous night.

"Hey, I thought you were both staying at the hospital last night?" Meredith asked.

Maggie, who looked slightly confused by the scene in front of her, went straight to the coffee pot. "They were stripping the floors. The smell gave me a migraine."

Amelia had an amused smile on her face. "So we came home. Good thing we got home just before the storm."

Alex turned to her. "What storm?"

Amelia was pleased that he bit at her bait. "Big storm. Lots of wind. Surprised you didn't hear it. There was a lot of banging. Sounded pretty close to your room, Mer."

Maggie shot Amelia a confused look. She hadn't witnessed a storm.

Alex and Meredith did their best to not show any reaction. "No, didn't hear anything." she said.

"Huh," Amelia said. "How bout you, Alex? Did _you_ hear the banging?"

Alex didn't look away from the breakfast he was cooking. He slowly shook his head. "Must've slept through it."

"Really!" mused Amelia. "It was some pretty heavy banging!" She continued.

"Amelia!" Meredith finally said, clearly imploring her to stop.

"I'm just saying banging like that can do some damage…"

Maggie, who had been busying herself with her morning ritual stopped packing her things and looked up, mouth agape.

"Okay! Who's ready for some breakfast!" Alex exclaimed, bringing the food to the table.

Amelia poured coffee, and closely watched the cozy scene. The kids were now sitting, eating breakfast. Meredith and Alex were talking to them, and each other. It seemed that they were going out of their way to avoid looking at Amelia.

"Ugh, this clinical trial is going to be the death of me!" complained Maggie, who had regained her composure but now was watching the scene along with Amelia.

"Nah, patients maybe. But you'll be fine." Quipped Amelia.

"Hilarious." Maggie said, clearly not amused. "Come on, we've got to go. Mer, are you working today?"

Meredith turned to Maggie. "No, we're both off. Ill see you later." Then turned back to the conversation she was having.

Amelia and Maggie exchanged glances, then left the room. As they were headed towards the door, Maggie, still trying to process what Amelia had implied asked, "You don't think…"

With a backwards glance at the happy scene, she smiled and said, "Oh, I think!"


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter Twenty Eight

It had been an extremely busy day. The kids had begged to go to the zoo until Alex relented, which didn't take long. They spent the day exploring all of the zoo's exhibits, spending extra time watching the monkeys play. Meredith had watched as Alex had imitated the monkeys, and the kids in turn imitated him. They had stocked up on all of the essentials in the gift shop, which included an assortment of hats, stuffed animals and balloons.

On the way home, they had stopped at the grocery store and stocked up for the week. Once home, they had settled into playing games, watching movies and making dinner. Meredith had offered to cook, but Zola stopped her.

"No, Mommy! Can Uncle Alex cook?"

"He makes good food!" Chimed in Bailey.

They both chortled at that, but Alex readily agreed.

After dinner, Meredith had been doing the dishes while Alex was talking to Zola in the living room.

"Uncle Alex, do you live here now?" She asked.

Alex looked over at Meredith, who stopped what she was doing and walked out to the living room. They were going to need to talk to her.

"What would you think about that, Zo?" Meredith asked.

"I think it would be great!" She exclaimed. Then we could play every day!" She thought for a minute, then asked, "Where is he going to sleep?"

Meredith and Alex exchanged nervous glances. "Well, he's going to stay in my room." Meredith explained.

Zola processed this the best she could. After a minute, her face fell. "You mean like Daddy used to?"

"Uh, Mer, why don't I take the little ones up and get them ready for bed?" Alex asked, wanting to give the mother and daughter some space.

Still stunned by Zola's question, Meredith simply nodded.

"Okay, guys! Let's get ready for bed!" He called, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible. He scooped up Ellis and held Bailey's hand as they went upstairs.

Meredith crouched down in front of her daughter. "Zo zo, your daddy loved you very much. All he ever wanted was for you to be happy. I know how much you miss him."

The little girl nodded sadly. "He was the best daddy."

Meredith swallowed hard. "Yeah, yeah he was."

Zola sat there for a minute, clearly still trying to understand. "Mommy, is Uncle Alex going to be my new daddy?"

Meredith felt like the air was getting sucked out of her. She tried to smile, but it came out more like a grimace. "Zola, Uncle Alex is always going to be there for you. He will always help you, play with you, and he will always love you. But Zo, he is not trying to replace your dad."

"That's true, Zo Zo." Alex said as he came down the stairs, sensing Meredith needed help. He came over to them and sat next to Zola on the couch. "Your dad is your dad. I never want to take his place. What I promise you, Zola, is that I will do anything for you. I'm always going to be here for you, and I'm always going to love you. My job is to do what I know your dad would have done. Like, take you to the zoo, and have princess tea parties, and feeding the ducks. And protecting you from your Mother's cooking."

This got a small laugh from Meredith and Zola.

"And my job is to help you remember him, too. To tell you, and Bailey and Ellis, all the stories I know about him. But only if that's okay with you, Zo."

She studied him for a moment, then smiled. "It's okay with me, Uncle Alex."

He saw Meredith quickly wipe away a tear. "Come here, munchkin." He wrapped Zola up in a big hug. "I love you kiddo."

Zola smiled. "I love you too, Uncle Alex."


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter Twenty Nine

Meredith was on the couch with a glass of wine, and a bottle of beer sat on the coffee table. Alex entered the living room and joined her, having just read to Zola. She motioned to the beer.

"I figured you could use one after that." She raised her wine glass, and says on a laugh, "I know I do!"

He sighs softly and sits down next to her, picking up the beer bottle. He takes a sip and looks at Meredith. "She's a great kid."

"You were great with her, you know." She reached and squeezed his hand.

"Yeah, well, kids are easy. You just have to be honest with them." He didn't handle praise well. He never felt like it was deserved.

Meredith's phone buzzed. She read the message, closed her eyes and half chuckled. "Amelia and Maggie will be home in 10 minutes. She wants to know if the winds have died down."

Alex chuckled. "Do I have to have a talk with them, too?"

Meredith laughed. "I think you're gonna need another beer!" She stood to go to the kitchen, but he pulled her back to the couch.

His eyes softened. "All I need is right here." He leaned in and kissed her. They had been in mid kiss when the silence was interrupted.

"Oh my gosh!" Maggie had entered the living room, taking them by surprise. She stood before them, a shocked expression on her face. She quickly covered her eyes and turned away as Amelia entered the room behind her, clearly not surprised.

Alex and Meredith jumped apart quickly out of reflex, although it was far too late for that.

Maggie had turned back around to face them. "Mer, what is this? What's going on?"

Meredith takes a deep breath and begins. "We need to talk to you both "

With these words, Maggie utters, "dammit!" under her breath while reaching in her pocket. She pulls out a hundred and hands it to Amelia, who scoffs at her. "I told you!" she teases as she holds the money up to the light, mockingly checking it's authenticity.

Meredith and Alex look to each other, then back to her sisters. "So you knew", said Meredith.

"It was SO obvious" Amelia sat in the chair across from them, as Maggie still stood, confused.

"I don't see how it was obvious", she says. I never got that vibe from you guys."

"Neither did we... until we did." Alex said as he took the hundred from Amelia and pretended to pocket it.

She snatched it back. "When did this happen? How? No, I don't want to know that."

Maggie shuddered.

"Cut it out. It's not like that." Meredith retorted.

"Actually it was a lot like that.. like 5 times…" in true Alex form, which garnered a playful smack from Meredith.

"Look, it's very new. To both of us. I want to tell you because I need you to keep this to yourselves. I don't want to become fodder for hospital gossip. I've been through that enough. What I will tell you is that we are very happy, and just trying to figure this out. So please, PLEASE, be supportive, ok?"

The sisters look at each other. They can see how happy they are. They want that for them.

Maggie nods, and offers a weak smile. She is still unsure how to process this new turn of events.

Amelia is more vocal. "My lips, unlike yours," she scoffs at her sister in law, "are sealed." She offered them a true smile. "I'm happy for you guys." She turned to Maggie. "Come on, Mags. Let's give the lovebirds some space." They turned and went up the stairs.


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter Thirty

Meredith and Alex were in her room getting ready for bed. She had just placed her phone on it's charger on her nightstand. "That went better than I thought.", she said.

Alex climbed into bed. "Yeah, I'm really glad I didn't have to have that talk with them." This caused them both to laugh lightly.

Meredith finished her nightly routine and joined Alex in the bed. In a more serious tone she said, "There have been a lot of changes these past few days. Maybe it's more than you bargained for?"

His demeanor turned to one of concern. "What are you getting at?" He asked.

"I just want to make sure that you're okay with all of this. It's a lot, tonight was a lot, and with me and the kids and the Derek issues...I feel like I've put a lot on you." She looked calm, but her heart was pounding as she said this. She knew it was completely irrational, but still worried he would take the out.

He knew she was still freaking out a bit. He could only imagine what this was like for her. This was such a huge step in the world of Meredith Grey – a step that he was so grateful to her for having taken. "I'm not going anywhere, Mer. Not now, not ever. The issues, the kids, the sisters...bring it on. It's nothing I can't handle. " She shook her head, as if to say he shouldn't have to handle it. He stopped her. "I _want_ to be here, Mer. More than you could ever know. I'll remind you of that every day – every minute – if you need it. You – you're like oxygen to me. You saved me, Mer. More times than I can count. I don't know what you ever saw in me back then, back when we started, but it was the first time in my life that I thought maybe – _maybe_ I wasn't a waste of space. In my worst days since then, I held on to that memory. You think you've put a lot on me?" He pulled her to him. "You've given me _everything_."

Relieved, she laid her head on his chest. "You are anything but a waste of space, Alex." After a moment, she continued. "And just so you know, you saved me right back."

He tipped her face up gently, and leaned in to kiss her. His hand tangled in her hair, and as the kiss deepened, he leaned her back on the bed. He broke momentarily from the kiss. "Maybe we should warn Amelia. I think there's another storm brewing!" As they laughed, he leaned in again.


	31. Chapter 31

**A/N: I thought it was time to bring some surgery back to Grey's. It's my first attempt at writing surgical lingo. Hope you like it!**

* * *

Chapter Thirty One

The morning had gotten off to a hectic start. A shared morning shower had caused them to run late. Meredith briefed the nanny on Ellis's latest ear infection and medication schedule. Alex helped get Zola's backpack ready to go. They both kissed the kids goodbye and raced out the door. They barely made it to the hospital in time for early rounds, and had said a hasty goodbye in the car.

Meredith was rounding with her resident, Cross, and intern, Levi. They entered the patient's room.

"Good morning, Ms. Jones!" Meredith greeted her warmly. How are you feeling today?"

"Good morning, Dr. Grey. I'm ready to get this over with!" she said anxiously.

"Okay, let's get on with it then. Schmitt, present." She said.

Levi began. "Laura Jones, sixty-six year old female in for a transgastric cholecystectomy NOTES procedure." He looks up from his reading. "Bad ass!"

"Dr. Schmitt!" she intoned sharply.

"Sorry. The patient has a one year history of gallstones, which failed conservative treatment measures of oral medications, and was found not to be a candidate for Lithotripsy due to the number and size of the stones."

"Why are we not doing a traditional laporoscopic surgery? Cross?"

"Three years ago Ms. Jones underwent surgery to remove an enlarged spleen following an auto accident. During the procedure, she suffered a hypertensive crisis, which was found to be caused by prolonged anesthesia. In addition, Ms. Jones has a history of narcotic abuse. The NOTES procedure will dramatically shorten the amount of time under anesthesia, and allow her to be relatively pain free immediately after surgery."

"I've been clean for ten years," she said to explain herself. "I don't want to take any chance of relapsing."

Meredith touched her arm affectionately. "I think you've made a good decision." She turned to Cross and Schmitt. "Get her prepped for surgery. Get a CBC type and cross, CMP, platelets, PT/PTT. Find me when they're done, and you can both scrub in. "

They both were excited at the statement, and thanked her profusely.

"What are you standing there for? Go!" she said, and smirked as she watched them scramble. Turning back to her patient, she said, "It's so fun to make them do that!" at which they both laughed.

As they were headed down the hall, she heard Schmitt say to Cross, "I wonder why she's in such a good mood."

"Who cares? We get to scrub in on a NOTES!"

Meredith shook her head and smiled.


	32. Chapter Thirty Two

Meredith waited for the elevator. The doors opened and a wave of nostalgia washed over her. Alex was alone in the elevator. It reminded her of when she and Derek had just started their romance. Quickly, she stepped on and waited for the doors to close. As they were closing, she stepped closer to him.

"Well this is different," he said as he pulled her to him. "How's your day going?"

"Better now," she said as she finished closing the distance between them.

They both laugh and just as they leaned in to kiss, the doors re-opened and Miranda stood before them. They had jumped apart, but was it in time? Neither one knew. Miranda's face didn't give much away.

"Meredith, did you do the consult on the lap choly?" She asked.

Struggling to maintain her composure, feeling like she was failing miserably, Meredith answered "I just came from there, but I'm doing a NOTES instead of a lap choly."

Miranda regarded her two attendings. Although she knew they were close friends, they stared ahead like a monster was about to burst through the elevator doors.

"Really? Impressive, Grey" she said, still studying them. She knew these two well. She had practically raised them, she was known to say. But what she was seeing was something different.

Meredith caught her gaze. "What is it, Dr. Bailey?" She tried to sound business-like, but felt her voice rise an octave.

"Nothing, Grey." She said unconvincingly .

The doors opened, and Meredith stepped off. Keeping this a secret was proving to be much more difficult than she thought.


	33. Chapter Thirty Three

Alex was working at a computer outside of a patient's room when Arizona approached him. He noticed that she seemed extra smiley today.

"Hey! How's your girlfriend? Your hot, hot girlfriend?" She asked playfully.

He didn't look up from his work. "Robbins, I'm not talking about this with you…"

She cut him off. "I heard a rumor," she said quickly.

Curious, he looked up at her. Her smile was replaced with a more serious expression. "Yeah?", he looked at her to continue, an eyebrow raised in anticipation.

Arizona leaned in to whisper. "I was at the nurse's station on three. They were saying that you're spending a lot of time with some woman. Jackie, the SICU nurse, told another nurse that she saw you with someone in the grocery store yesterday, but she couldn't see who it was."

Alex's face fell. He hadn't considered that they could get discovered while shopping.

Oblivious to his distress, Arizona continued. "So I did what I said I'd do. I put a stop to it."

Relieved, he smiled at her. "Really? What did you say?"

"I told them that they have no right to be talking about you like that. And just so they know, the only woman you spend any time with is Meredith Grey, and clearly nothing is going on there!" she looked at him triumphantly, proud of herself for having defended her friend.

Alex's hand flew up to his mouth in an effort to cover his shocked expression "So, you deflected the rumor by saying I spend a lot of time with Meredith?" he asked incredulously.

"Yeah! I sure did!"

Alex stood in stunned silence for a moment, his hand still over his mouth. A smile appeared in the corner of his eyes, quickly turning into laughter.

Confused, Arizona said, "What? I did good, right?"

This brought harder laughter from Alex, who looked around. Spotting an open patient room, he grabbed her arm. "Come here," he said leading the way.

Once they were in the room, he closed the door and shut the blinds for added privacy.

Arizona didn't know what to make of the secrecy and the laughter. She just stood and watched him, waiting for him to reveal his thoughts.

He laughed another moment before composing himself. "Robbins," he began, but laughter threatened to derail the conversation. She was so proud of herself! He cleared his throat, looking away from her for a second. Feeling confident that he could speak, he began again. "Robbins, it IS Meredith."

Grinning, he rocked back on his heels as he watched her expression change a half dozen times as realization sunk in. Finally, her eyes widened in understanding of what she had inadvertently done, at which point they both dissolved into laughter.

After a couple of minutes of this, she stopped herself. Gasping for breath, she spoke. "Oh, Alex!...I'm so sorry!" she began to chuckle again at the irony, but settled down quickly. "I really didn't know!"

This brought a new laugh from Alex. "No, you didn't!"

They again settled down. She regarded him anew. "Wow. So you and Meredith!" she spoke with sincerity. "That's really….awesome, Alex." She closed her eyes briefly as a though crossed her mind. "She's going to hate me, isn't she?"

"Nah, she'll get over it. I won't let her hate you."

She came over to her friend and hugged him. "I'm really happy for you, Alex."

He hugged her back. "Me too," he said, smiling.


	34. Chapter Thirty Four

Meredith was scrubbed in, getting ready to start the NOTES procedure. Schmitt and Cross were scrubbed in, eager to get a chance at cutting.

She stood over the patient. "Scalpel," she said authoritatively. Starting the laparoscopic incision, she asked, "Schmitt, tell me what the acronym NOTES stands for."

He stammered. "Umm, Natural Orafice Transluminal Endoscopic Surgery." He gave a little laugh and feigned wiping his brow. "Phew! That's a mouthful!"

Meredith looked up at her scrub nurse, Bokhee, and rolled her eyes. "If you have trouble with that, actual surgery may be a bit much for you, Schmitt."

He nervously replied, "Yeah, I mean no, no it's not. I was just…"

Meredith cut him off. "Cross, what's the difference between a NOTES procedure done here in America versus overseas?" she asked.

He cleared his throat. "Here, we do a hybrid approach, starting with a laparoscopic incision, whereas overseas they opt for a true NOTES procedure, which is done entirely transluminally."

"Meaning what, exactly?" Meredith continued.

"Meaning that in a true NOTES procedure, not only is the surgery performed transluminally, but the surgical tools themselves are passed through the natural Orafice, either vaginally or rectally."

Schmitt's nervous energy again came out in his speech. "Rectally? Ouch! Am I right?"

Before Meredith could respond, her phone buzzed. "Could someone please check that?" she asked.

An assistant scrub nurse checked the read out. "It's your nanny, Dr. Grey. Ellis has spiked a one hundred two degree fever." Would you like me to call your sisters?"

Without stopping what she was doing, she said, "No, get me Alex! Call Dr. Karev." The urgency was evident in her voice.

"Right away, Dr. Grey." She dialed the phone.

"Put it on speaker." she instructed.

The sound of the phone ringing permeated the operating suite, the only other sound was the beeping of the monitors.

He picked up on the second ring. "Hey Mer. I thought you were in surgery."

"I am. The nanny called. Ellis's fever is back up to 102. Can you go?"

"Don't worry, I'm on my way. She'll be fine. I got her." He repeated his promise from the other night.

Although he couldn't see it she nodded, more to reassure herself than as an answer to him. "Thank you. And Alex, call me when you get there."

"I will." He disconnected.


	35. Chapter 35

Chapter Thirty Five

Meredith had just finished washing her hands after the successful surgery when her phone rang. She answered immediately, anxious to hear that Alex was with Ellis.

"Alex? How is she?"

"The ear infection has definitely gotten worse. It looks like the antibiotics aren't working. I don't see any signs of fluid, so I think she's just going to need something stronger. I brought cephalosporin with me just in case. Are you okay with that?"

"Yes, of course. I'm just finishing up, and then I'll be on my way home. Thank you for this. I feel so much better knowing you're there with her."

"No problem, Mer. Really. Drive safe, and I'll see you soon."

"I will. Bye."

As Meredith hung up the phone she was again struck by how much easier everything was with Alex around. She opened the door to the scrub room. As she stepped into the hall, she practically ran into Arizona.

"Arizona, hi," Meredith began. Before she could continue, Arizona interrupted her.

"Meredith, I'm so sorry. I really didn't know it was you! If I had known, I never would have..." she is babbling nervously.

Confused, Meredith asks, "You didn't know _what_ was me?"

Arizona grimaced. "I sort of outed your relationship with Alex to the third floor nurses station." The grimace remained, but she tried to turn it into a smile.

"Wait, Alex told me he didn't tell you it was me..how did you know?" she looked around as she spoke, hoping no one else over heard the conversation.

"It's not his fault...not anyone's fault, really. When I was asking him for details about the girl he was seeing – you – he told me that you guys weren't ready to go public, so I had promised that if I had heard any rumors, I'd shoot them down. I overheard some nurses talking about how they saw Alex in the grocery store this weekend, but they couldn't see who he was with. So, I sort of told them that the only woman he spends time with is – you. But really, I was trying to help! I swear!"

Meredith stood and listened to Arizona's story. She was shocked at first, and upset that more people had potentially found out about their relationship before she was ready to reveal it, but hearing Arizona describe her faux pas struck her as funny. She found herself laughing instead.

After a moment's hesitation, Arizona joined in on the laughter. She was relieved to have gotten that out in the open. "Meredith, I really am sorry! And I swear I haven't _told_ -told anyone." She smiled. "You really make him happy."

Meredith returned the smile. "He makes me happy, too. I'm not angry with you, Arizona. It's an honest mistake. I know it's pretty silly, and pretty impossible, to keep this a secret. It's just..."

Arizona finished her sentence. "You don't want the entire hospital in your relationship."

Meredith nodded. "Exactly."

At the same time, both women said, "Been there, done that!" which sent them into another round of laughter.


	36. Chapter Thirty Six

Meredith entered the house a little past seven o'clock. As she set her bags down on the floor, she heard voices coming from the kitchen. She followed the sound and stopped in the doorway to watch the scene in front of her.

Alex was cooking dinner, Ellis on his hip, while Zola and Bailey sat at the table.

"Uncle Alex is this right?" Zola asked.

Alex turned away from the stove and went to check her work. "Yes! You got it, Zo!" He gave her a high five.

"Me too!" Bailey chirped. Alex looked at his paper. "You're really getting good at staying in the lines, dude!" and gave him a high five as well.

As she watched, she was struck with a small pang of sadness that Derek couldn't be here, but it was quickly replaced with contentment at seeing her family so happy.

"Hi guys!" she immediately went to Ellis. "How are you feeling?" she cooed, taking the girl from Alex.

"Mommy, Uncle Alex is helping me with my homework." Zola informed her.

"Me too!" Bailey joyously added.

Meredith laughed. "That's great!"

"She fell asleep almost immediately after I gave her the antibiotic and acetaminophen." He turned to the little girl. "But I think it was because she loves when her Uncle Alex holds her," he said as he tickled her under her chin. He leaned in to whisper to Meredith. "Just like her mom."

Smiling, Meredith squeezed his arm. "Thank you for being so great. But you didn't have to do all this!" she gestured to the dinner.

"It's just dinner. We have to eat," he said matter-of-factly. "I enjoy this, Mer. I love taking care of all of you."

She put Ellis in her high chair, giving her a cup of juice. "Well, at least let me assist," she said, tying her hair back as she did so.

He looked at her, an amused smile playing on his face. "Yeah? Okay, but you do what I tell you to do when I say to do it."

Understanding from where he was coming, she chuckled. "So I'm an intern?"

He gave her a half grin which she found so charming. "Damn straight you're an intern! You have a lot to learn!"

"You do, mom." Zola joined in the discussion.

"Zola!" Meredith exclaimed, feigning shock.

Zola laughed. "Sorry, but it's true!"

They were all laughing now. "Come on, guys! I'm not that bad!" Meredith exclaimed, which only intensified the laughter.

After a moment, Alex took her by the hand. "Come here." He gently positioned her in front of the stove, standing close behind her. He picked up a utensil from the spoon rest on the stove. "Here, hold this." She did as he instructed. "Now, the thing with sauce is you have to stir it, or it will burn." He placed his hand over hers, and together they stirred the sauce.

"It smells so good." Meredith said.

Alex leaned in to her. "So do you." His lips lightly brushed her neck when he said it making her go weak in the knees.

She cleared her throat as she gave him the spoon. "Maybe you should stir the sauce," she said as she moved away from the stove. "Zola and Bailey, let's get your homework cleaned up so we can set the table."

The kids gathered up their things, and left the kitchen to put them away. Meredith took the opportunity to rush back to Alex for a quick, but lustful, kiss. Knowing the kids would return any second, they broke from the embrace, her hand lingered on his chest.

"That will have to hold us til tonight," Meredith looked at him longingly.

"If you keep looking at me like that, Im not going to make it til tonight."

She forced herself to look away "So, I ran into Arizona this afternoon. "

Alex had turned his attention back to the dinner he was preparing, but could tell from the sound of her voice that she was amused. "She told you?"

"Yeah, but I think it was because she thought I already knew. I guess our secret is out."

"Is that really so bad?"

"It's just that I've been there before. You know how they talk. Every one thinks it's their business." She cleared the table, and got more juice for Ellis, who was clamoring for it in her high chair.

"So, let 'em talk. Nothing anyone says could change the way I feel about you."

She watched him at the stove, preparing their food. In that moment, she confirmed to herself what she had long known – he would do anything for her or her kids. Also in that moment, she vowed to herself that she would do everything she could for him, too.


	37. Chapter Thirty Seven

The evening had gone smoothly, so smoothly that Meredith couldn't believe it. When he said time for bed, they didn't fight him like they did with her. They went upstairs without a peep. He worked together with Meredith, giving baths, reading bedtime stories and tucking them all in. She couldn't help herself, but she found herself watching him in awe. He took everything in his stride, enjoying every minute. He had given Ellis her medications and took her temperature without her fussing. It seemed that every time she thought it couldn't get better, somehow it did.

As they readied themselves for bed, she thought about everything he had ever done for her. He had sacrificed for her over and over again, never expecting anything in return. She thought about what he had said in the kitchen. Maybe it wasn't such a big deal for people to find out about them.

She started to speak figuring it out as she went. "I guess it wouldn't be the worst thing."

He stopped undressing and looked at her. "What won't"

"You know, everyone finding out about us."

He stepped towards her. "Yeah?"

Smiling, she stepped towards him as well. "Yeah," she said flirtatiously.

"Well, we can make that happen." He continued to advance towards her.

"I think we should," she finished closing the gap between them.

He brushed her hair from her face, and bent down to kiss her neck. She moaned involuntarily at his touch. She reached up to pull his face to her, and kissed him passionately. He picked her up and carried her to the bed. They made quick work of removing each other's clothes. He broke the kiss and looked up at her. "God, you're beautiful," he said. This caused her to smile and kiss him with greater intensity. He ran his hands through her hair, then lower.

She tried to reach up and pull him to her, but he resisted. "No, we do this my way tonight." He kissed her neck again, then worked his way south...

A few hours later, they laid in each other's arms, completely drained. "So how do you want to tell everyone?" he asked.

"We have to tell Webber and Bailey first. And we're going to need to sign the disclosure. And then, I don't care who finds out after that."

"Really?"

"Alex, I saw you tonight. I _really_ saw you."

He looked at her, confused. "Do you even know how amazing you are?" He started to brush her off. "No, Alex, I'm serious. You jump in, no questions asked. You do so much for all of us, and you don't ask for anything in return. And you've been doing it so long-"

"Mer, it's no big deal. Like I told you, I love taking care of you guys."

"Alex, it is a big deal. I need you to know that I – I _see_ you. I'm more than ready to tell the world about us."

He was stunned. "I don't know what to say. I know you see me, Mer. You always have. That time when we were working on the quints, and I was studying to retake my practicals, you asked me if I was okay. Do you remember that?"

"Yeah, of course."

He looked away, deciding if he should reveal this. "It was the first time."

She was confused. "The first time?"

He took a breath and continued, still looking away. "The first time that anyone gave a damn about me. No one had ever asked me that before. No one had ever cared. So yeah, I know you see me." He looked at her, and saw she had tears in her eyes. "It's why I love taking care of you so much. And don't think you don't do anything for me. I told you before, you've given me everything."

A single tear escaped and rolled down her face. She had been thinking of how he had changed her life. She really never realized that she had changed his, too.


	38. Chapter Thirty Eight

Morning came quickly, and with it the usual hustle and bustle of a household getting ready for the day. Meredith and Alex were up early, anxious about their plans for the morning. Meredith had sent a message to Dr. Webber and Dr. Bailey requesting a meeting with them both in an hour.

She and Alex worked quickly together, readying themselves and the kids for the day. The nanny had been briefed about the medication change for Ellis and given instructions which included checking her temperature every four hours and texting the results to both Meredith and Alex.

As Alex was preparing breakfast for the kids, Maggie entered the kitchen. She watched as the two of them worked together. She observed Alex as the kids spoke to him. He seemed to hang on their every word. She noticed how Ellis snuggled into him as he held her. She saw the contented smile on Meredith's face as she packed lunches. She struggled to remember the last time she saw her looking so at peace, but soon gave up. She had never seen that look on her sister before. It filled Maggie's heart with happiness. Smiling widely, she entered the kitchen.

"Morning guys," she said brightly, crossing to the coffee pot.

They all greeted her warmly. As Maggie poured her coffee, she realized what she had been watching. It was a family, getting ready for their day. They had always been their own unique kind of family, but this was a true, functioning family. She walked over to Meredith, who was finishing packing the lunches.

"I get it, Mer. I see it now. I don't know how I didn't see it before."

Meredith smiled at her. She understood, as it had taken her some time to see it, too. "We're telling the Chief and Richard."

Maggie's eyes widened. "You're going public?"

Meredith laughed at her excitement. "Yeah, we're going public."

Maggie grew concerned. She knew this was a huge step for her sister. "Are you sure you're ready? Are you nervous?"

Meredith watched Alex with the kids, packing Zola's backpack, kissing them on the head and wishing them a good day, making promises to play tonight after dinner.

Without breaking her gaze at her family, she shook her head. "I'm not nervous at all."


	39. Chapter Thirty Nine

An hour later, Meredith and Alex were standing outside the chief's office. He squeezed her hand. "You ready?" he nervously asked her.

She chuckled. "I wasn't nervous before, but I just got this strange feeling. I feel like I'm bringing a boy home to meet my parents!"

They both chortled at that. It really did feel that way. "Okay, here we go!" she said, knocking on the door.

"Come in, Grey!" Miranda called. She looked up to see not only Meredith, but Alex was with her. They had a strange look on their faces. The look, accompanied by Miranda's memories of Alex's past, instantly put Dr. Bailey on high alert. She stiffened in her seat, afraid of what was unfolding in front of her. "What did you do?" she hissed at Alex.

"Let's just wait for Dr. Webber," Meredith said calmly.

Miranda did not relax as they stood there, side by side, looking as nervous as she had ever seen them. Her stomach was in knots as they waited for what seemed an eternity for Dr. Webber to arrive.

A moment later there was a knock on the door. "Come in!" her tone was sharper than had been intended.

Richard entered the office cautiously after hearing Miranda's tone. He observed the tension in the room, and took a seat against the window. "You two want to tell us what this is all about?" he said.

Meredith and Alex exchanged nervous glances. Meredith cleared her throat.

Miranda spoke before she could begin. "Karev, if you've done something, I don't know if I can help you this time," she tried to cover the nervousness in her voice.

"Dr. Bailey, it isn't like that," Meredith said.

"Then what is it, Grey? Cuz you're scaring the hell out of me!"

"Sorry, it's just that you're going to be hearing something, and I, uh we, want you to hear it from us first."

Richard leaned forward in his seat. "Hear what from you first?" He had an idea where this was going, but wanted to hear them say it.

Meredith looked to Alex. "This is harder than I thought." He nodded to her to continue. She took a deep breath and looked at them. "We're together."

"Okay, together in what?" Bailey was anticipating more to the reveal.

The room fell silent for a moment. "Well, I'll be damned." Richard said quietly.

Meredith and Alex looked at him, smiling shyly.

Miranda looked to Richard, then to Meredith and Alex. It was a full thirty seconds before realization sunk in. "Together together?" was all she could muster.

They both nodded meekly.

Regaining her composure, Miranda smiled widely. "Well, it's about damn time!"

Richard laughed heartily. "I couldn't agree more!" He stood, and hugged Meredith tightly, and offered Karev a handshake. He reached in to his pocket and pulled out his wallet.

Miranda stood and came around the desk. She hugged them both tightly. Stepping back, she looked at Richard, and held out her hand. Rolling his eyes, he handed her a hundred dollar bill.

Meredith and Alex looked to each other in shock. "You bet on us?" she exclaimed.

Alex, realizing Richard lost, added "You bet against us?"

Smiling, Richard put his hand on Alex's shoulder. "Sorry, but I thought you were permanently friend-zoned!" He chuckled.

Meredith stood, mouth agape, as she looked from Miranda pocketing her winnings, back to Richard. "I don't believe this!" was all she could say.

Richard leaned in to whisper to Alex, who was laughing. "If you hurt her, I'll kill ya." He then laughed again, patting Alex, who was no longer laughing, on the shoulder.

Alex took Meredith's hand in his. "Dr. Webber, I will never hurt her. I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for Meredith. I owe her everything." He looked lovingly at Meredith, who returned his gaze.

Miranda looked to Richard, who nodded his approval. "Well, alright then." She said quietly. "I'm really happy for you both."

"Thank you, Dr. Bailey," Meredith said.

"So am I," Richard added.

Relaxing, Alex pulled Meredith in to his side and put his arm around her.

"Come see me later, and I'll have the paperwork for you to sign." said Miranda.

"We will." Meredith said as they turned to leave. Stopping, she turned back to them. "Thank you both." They then turned and left the room.


	40. Chapter 40

They stood hand in hand waiting for the elevator. "They bet on us!" she said incredulously.

He chuckled. "Yeah, and Webber lost."

They looked at each other and laughed. "So, we're telling people." He said.

She looked at him lovingly. "Oh yeah, we're telling people."

Alex and Meredith entered the elevator. As soon as the doors closed, he pulled her to him and kissed her deeply. Her hands went to his hair, and he deepened the kiss. They were so caught up, they didn't hear the elevator doors open. They looked up at the sound of someone clearing their throat.

"Uh, sorry. Didn't mean to interrupt- whatever this is…" Owen's voice startled them.

They broke apart, but stayed side by side, smiling. "Sorry, we really should have been more careful." Meredith said.

He studied them for a moment. He couldn't fault them for their public display, as he had done the same on numerous occasions. "We? So, you're together?" he asked.

They looked at each other lovingly. "Yeah, we're together," Meredith said.

He chuckled and shook his head. "Wow, so when did this happen?"

"It's been almost a week," Alex said.

Meredith was watching Owen. "What was that?" she asked him.

He was perplexed "What was what?"

"That head shake. I saw you."

The elevator stopped. "Oh, that. It's nothing." The doors opened. "I just owe Cristina a hundred bucks." He smiled, and turned to leave.

"You bet on us, too?" she called after him. The elevator doors closed. "I can't believe he bet on us too! And Cristina! She didn't tell me…"

She was interrupted by Alex, who pulled her to him to resume their interrupted kiss.


	41. Chapter Forty One

**PART TWO**

Meredith had just finished checking on her surgical post op patients when her phone buzzed with what she recognized was hospital business. She glanced down at the display and felt heat rise in her cheeks as she smiled. Alex was calling for a consult.

She pocketed her phone and headed for the elevators.

The elevator doors opened on the pediatric floor and Meredith stepped off, in search of Alex.

She was hurrying down the hallway when a door on her left suddenly opened and she was pulled inside. She was momentarily taken back, but quickly relaxed when she saw Alex.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you."

"No, it's okay! I'm just surprised. I thought you needed a consult."

"Yeah, I need a consult." He sighed, running his hands through his hair. "My intern is driving me crazy, and I just needed a break."

He pulled her in to hug her. He inhaled the intoxicating scent of her lavender shampoo and instinctively reached up to run his hands through her silky light brown hair. She looked up at him, and he was transfixed. Her blue eyes sparkled and danced, daring him to kiss her. He leaned in, and she rose up on tiptoe to meet him halfway. He devoured her mouth, thrusting his tongue between her lips, finding her tongue intertwined with his.

He yearned to touch her smooth skin and tugged at her scrub top, pulling it up just a little so he could get his hand underneath. Relishing the way her skin warmed to his touch, he slid his hand around to the small of her back.

Blindly, they stumbled towards the bed, peeling their clothes off along the way. Upon reaching the bed, she pushed him back and straddled his waist. He reached behind her neck and grabbed her hair as he drew her into him. His lips lightly brushed hers, tasting her for just a second before he hungrily parted her lips and swirled his tongue with hers. His hands wandered downward, pausing to cup her fullness before they worked their way lower, sliding down to her tiny waist.

He grabbed her around her midsection and gently but with great urgency flipped her onto her back.

She looped her arms around his neck and pulled him down to her. She clung to him as their motions escalated and a small sound escaped her, intensifying his motions. Moments later, their building passion reached its peak, and they collapsed together, their breathing ragged.

As they lay there together in blissful exhaustion, he reached over to stroke her hair. "Well, that was the best consult I've ever had!" They both laughed at this. Suddenly, his smile faded and his eyes darkened. "If I had to go through all the crap in my life just to get to be here with you, it was worth it."

She didn't know if she would say the same. After all, her list of what she had gone through included watching her husband get shot, being in a plane crash that took her sister and friend, and removing her husband from life support- and those were just the chart toppers!

As she gazed into his eyes, Meredith couldn't help but be reminded of one of their earliest conversations.

 _"Are you really as shallow and callous as you seem?"_ she had said.

" _Oh, do you want to go out for a drink later, and hear about my secret pain?"_ he had said, flirting with her.

She had thought it was a line, but his secret pain was, indeed, very real. The memory evoked a smile from her, and earned her a Karev half smile.

"What?" he said.

"I just had a memory." She revealed the memory to him. "You hit on me!" she laughed.

Grinning, he said, "Yeah, well you hit on me right back!"

"I did not!" she smacked his chest playfully.

"You're forgetting the best part of that memory."

"Which part?"

"Don't you remember what you said to me next?" Alex revealed the remainder of that day from so very long ago.

" _Does that line ever work for you?_ " she had asked.

" _Sometimes_."

" _Oh. Must be because you look like that."_

Meredith laughed. "You're right! I had completely forgotten that!" She stared into his hazel eyes, filled with so much love. "I guess we were always meant to be." She said.


	42. Chapter Two

Chapter Two

Alex had been called to the ER for a consult. As he headed down the hallway, nearing the ER, he was feeling happier than he had ever felt in his life. He kept replaying what she had said.

 _I guess we were always meant to be._

Those words wound their way around his heart like the warmest of hugs After Derek, for her to love again, and love him, was miraculous enough. To say they were meant to be was…there was no word to describe it.

His reverie was interrupted by his phone's notification tone. He glanced at the display. His patient was coding. He took off at a run, not seeing the water on the floor as he rounded the corner. He lost his footing and slid head first. He tried to put his arms up to block his head, but there just wasn't enough time. His head hit full force into the door jam with a sickening thud, followed by total darkness.

Fortunately , the horrific fall had been witnessed by April, who was headed in the opposite direction.

"I need help here, now!" she shouted, as she knelt at his side. A quick assessment revealed that he was unconscious, but had a pulse. Gently checking his head, she found no signs of bleeding, save for a small scrape. She knew this meant a closed head trauma, possibly a brain bleed.

"Damn it, Alex! Don't do this!"

Suddenly, Owen and a team of help had arrived. April held Alex's head steady as they prepared to place him on the backboard. Once he was secured, April took point. "On my count. One, two three." They lifted the backboard, placed him gently on the gurney, and raced to the trauma room, April continuing her assessment as they went. "No eye opening, no verbal response." She dug her fist into his sternum, which caused him to withdraw. "Withdraws to pain. GCS six. Page Shepherd, STAT!"

"Page her to CT. She can meet us there." Owen said.

April nodded. "Agreed. Let's get him to CT now!"

Owen and April exchanged nervous glances as they raced towards the elevator. The doors opened, and Richard was about to get off when he saw who the patient was. "Good God, what happened?"

"Head trauma. GCS six. On our way to CT." April gave him the bullet, then added, "Sir…Meredith." He nodded as the doors closed.

A sent text was quickly answered, giving him her location in the attendings lounge. He told her to stay put, he needed to talk to her. He pressed the button for the elevator and waited.

Meredith finished her coffee while she waited for Richard. The message seemed a little odd, but was not really out of the ordinary. She was too happy to be concerned. A lump formed in her throat the second she saw Richard. He had on his 'something terrible has happened' face. She stiffened in her chair.

"What is it?" she asked, her voice tight.

"There's been an accident. Alex has been injured."

She flew out of the chair. "Where is he?"

Richard tried to restrain her. "He somehow hit his head. He's on the way to CT."

She pushed past him and ran to the stairs. She got to the CT room in record time. April, Owen and Amelia grimly looked at the scan. "Book an OR." Amelia said, as Meredith entered the room.

They all turned to look at her. She stared through the glass at him. He was so still. Meredith went to the monitor and steeled herself before looking at the image. When she brought her eyes to it, she gasped. He had a rather large epidural hematoma. She immediately recognized the severity of the situation.

"What's his GCS?"

"Six," Owen said, clearing his throat.

The anguish on her face intensified.

Amelia went to her and hugged her, which Meredith was too numb to return. "I promise I will do my very best. He's in good hands."

Meredith barely nodded as Amelia took off quickly to the OR. Meredith rushed to Alex's side as the team readied him for transport to the OR. She bent down and kissed him softly. She then leaned to speak in his ear. "Come back to me, Alex. I'll be right here, waiting for you. I love you."

She ran with the team towards the OR, holding his hand the whole way. When they reached the OR, Owen stopped her. "You know you can't go in, Meredith."

"I'll just hold his hand…"

Owen looked at her sympathetically. "I'm sorry."

She was about to lose it when April spoke. "I can go in. I'll sit and hold his hand for you, Meredith. Is that okay?"

She barely nodded, trying to hold it together. April looked at her, a mix of fear and sympathy on her face. She touched her shoulder in a show of support, then entered the OR with Owen, who just felt that he needed to do something, even if it was just observe and be there for emotional support for Amelia.

Meredith turned her back to the door, and sunk to her knees, no longer able to stand. She was too shocked to cry, but she couldn't will herself to move. A moment later, Arizona sunk down next to her.

"He's Alex. He will be okay." It would have been comforting if her voice wasn't shaking so bad.

Again, all Meredith could muster was a barely visible nod.

Arizona took Meredith's hand. "Do you want to go to the gallery?"

She nodded, a little more visibly this time.

"Okay," Arizona said gently, offering her an attempt at a smile. She helped Meredith off the floor and put her arm around her for support as they went to the gallery.


	43. Chapter Three

Chapter Three

They sat side by side in the gallery, watching the surgery and listening through the intercom. It had been a couple of hours. Arizona had not let go of Meredith's hand. Alex would want someone with her, to make sure she was okay. She would be that person for her. Cristina was gone and Alex was on the table. She remembered when Callie had been on the table, and how terrifying it was. She would not let Meredith go through this alone.

Others had joined them. Richard came first, followed by Bailey. Maggie had been in surgery, but came as soon as she could. She sat on Meredith's other side. They had all tried to talk to her, but she had not said a word since before the surgery had started.

Arizona studied her face for a moment. She suddenly remembered where she had seen that look before. She had the same look on her face as when she told them about Derek. Derek, who had died as a result of a brain injury. Involuntarily, Arizona's mouth opened at the abject horror of it all. Realizing she needed to be strong for her, she swallowed her feelings as best she could and gave her hand a squeeze.

"Alex is strong, Meredith. He is a fighter. He fights for what he loves, and what he loves the most is you. He is going to come back to you." She spoke slowly, deliberately, forcing her voice to stay even and not show just how terrified she was. She was thinking of what to say next when Amelia's voice became urgent.

"Suction! More! More! I see the clot. Okay, stop! Pic ups!"

Meredith leaned forward in her chair. She heard April talking to Alex. "Meredith is watching, Alex. She's right up there in the gallery. You got this! Fight for her!"

Amelia sighed. "I got it." Amelia relaxed, as Owen breathed a sigh of relief.

"Oh thank God! You did good, Alex. You did real good." April bowed her head in relief.

Those in the gallery cheered. Arizona cried happy tears, and pulled Meredith in for a hug. Meredith put her head on her shoulder, still in shock. Arizona rubbed her back. "It's good, Meredith. She got it. She got it." She repeated herself, worrying that Meredith did not seem to comprehend the good news. Maggie and Richard tried to talk to her as well, to reiterate that it was good. She did not respond to anyone.

Bailey was concerned. "Okay, give her some space, people. Let her be."

Richard, Maggie and Bailey along with a few others who had gathered, left the gallery.

Amelia looked up at the gallery. Arizona smiled at her, but Meredith looked shell shocked. It actually took Amelia a couple of minutes to realize why she looked that way. It was because of Derek. The relief faded from her face as she desperately clawed at her mask, running out of the OR. April looked up, confused, as Owen ran after her, leaving the resident to close.

Owen caught up to her just as she had emptied the contents of her lunch into a trash can.

"Amelia, are you alright?"

She stood, wiped her mouth with the back of her hand and leaned against the wall for support. She turned to face him, and that's when Owen saw the tears streaking her face.

"Amelia?" Deep concern lines filled his face.

"Derek." It was a whisper, followed by sobs. "She almost lost him to the same thing that killed Derek. Oh, God!"

She collapsed into Owen's arms. He stroked her hair and held her tightly. "You saved him, Amelia. You did that. That kind of bleed – not everyone could fix that." After a minute, he continued, "You know what I think? I think Derek was there today. I think he wasn't going to let her go through that again."

Amelia stopped crying and looked up at Owen. "So now he gets credit for my awesome save?" she teased.

Owen smiled. "No, that was clearly all you."

He hugged her as they laughed.

In the gallery, there was no change in Meredith. She heard them say it was good, but she could not believe it. He was not okay until he was awake and alert. Then she knew he would be okay.

Special moments flashed through her mind. Happy times between herself and Derek, and then the wonderful new happy times with Alex. They were not in any order, just flashed through her mind like mixed up playing cards. It was too much to process. She replayed part of their last conversation in her head.

 _"If I had to go through all the crap in my life just to get to be here with you, it was worth it."_

And now, here he is, getting dealt more crap. She felt like the universe was trying to take away anyone that she loved. Maybe she was cursed, and the second she said she loved him, it put a mark on him. She knew it wasn't rational thought, but now was not the time for rational thought.

"Meredith, do you want to go see him?" Arizona asked.

She again nodded, afraid to speak. She just needed to know he was going to be okay.


	44. Chapter Four

Chapter Four

Alex was just being extubated when Meredith and Arizona entered the room. Amelia was checking his pupils. "Equal, round and reactive!" Meredith thought she sounded more like a proud parent than a doctor.

She turned to Meredith. "It went really well, Mer. I'll be by to do neuro checks every twenty minutes. I'll be right out here if you need me."

Meredith just stared at Alex, no change in her facial expression. Amelia squeezed her shoulder as she passed her.

Arizona pulled a chair next to the bed, and gently sat Meredith down in it. She then went to the closet and took down a blanket. She was worried that Meredith was in shock, so she wrapped her in the blanket as a precaution, and rubbed her shoulders to generate warmth. "Do you need anything? Can I get you anything?"

Meredith just shook her head in the negative.

"Okay. I'm going to be right outside this room if you need anything."

Meredith just continued her catatonic stare, holding Alex's hand.

Amelia returned a few minutes later for a neuro check. She shook him. "Alex, can you hear me?" but there was no response. She shone the light in his eyes. "Pupils equal, round and reactive." She sounded somewhat less proud this time. She dug her fist into his sternum, and he withdrew. "Withdraws from pain. No eye opening, no speech. GCS is still six." She turned to Meredith. "It's still early. His ICP is normalizing, but there is still swelling. He'll come around." She got no response, which was as she expected. "I'll be back in twenty."

Meredith thought about him playing with the kids, playing princess tea party with Zola, pink tiara on his head when he thought Meredith wasn't looking; the way he acted like a horse, letting Bailey ride him around the living room until his knees bled; Ellis snuggling into his chest as he held her.

She thought about when she had to tell Zola and Bailey that daddy died. She tried to brush it out of her mind, but the fear was there. What if he didn't wake up?

No! She would not allow the thought. Alex will wake up. She squeezed his hand, and wished there was something she could do.

Maggie and Amelia stood a few feet from Alex's hospital room, talking quietly, when April approached them.

"How's he doing?" April asked.

"I just don't know why he's not awake yet." Amelia hugged herself, and bit her lower lip.

April glanced into the room. She saw Meredith seated next to Alex's bed. Her head hung low, her shoulders slumped. Her eyes stayed on Alex, save for flicking them to the monitors every few minutes. Her eyes were dark and sad, but also dry.

"How's she doing?" April asked Meredith's sisters.

"Not good. She won't talk. It's like she doesn't even realize we are in the room. She hasn't even cried. It's…freaky. I know I would cry. I'm really worried about her. This has to be so hard, I can't even imagine. After losing Derek to a head injury…" Maggie's voice trailed off. She momentarily had forgotten that Derek was Amelia's brother. "Oh, Amelia. I'm so sorry…"

Amelia waved her off. "It's fine. Derek died. Alex is still alive. He's just not awake." She spoke matter of factly, like someone who knew all too well what loss felt like. However, the tremble in her voice betrayed her anxiety. "I can't be the one who killed Meredith's love."

Maggie and April looked to each other. April ventured to speak. "He's going to be fine, Amelia. You haven't killed anyone. We just have to have faith.."

"Faith? My son was born without a brain. My brother saved two car loads of people from a car accident, then got hit by a freaking semi. He was a world class neurosurgeon and died because some Podunk hospital couldn't be bothered to do a CT scan. Now, when my sister has finally found love again, I may be the reason he dies? Tell me again about this faith!" she spat the word.

April knew the pain she was feeling. She understood how it could seem like Faith was an illusion, a concept. Today, she had to have Faith for them all. She turned from Maggie and Amelia and went in to the room.

Meredith didn't so much as make eye contact when April went to stand next to her. The desperation seemed to exude from Meredith like a film that settled over the room. She was now leaned forward on the bed, with her head resting on her folded arms. April's heart went out to her. The only person who could make this better was fighting for his life. She closed her eyes and prayed silently for the right thing to do. After a minute, she picked up Alex's hand in hers.

"Dear Lord, I don't know why this happened, or what your plan is here. I know that I trust in you, and all your goodness, but please don't take this man."

She is suddenly overwhelmed with emotion. "You don't _get_ to take him! This man is needed here, Lord. He has people who love him, and need him in their lives. His work is not finished!"

She looked at Meredith, who had picked her head up. She reached down and took her hand as well and softened her tone.

"And Lord, please watch over Meredith. Give her comfort, and strength. I know she doesn't believe, but I don't think that's true. She has been through more, _survived_ more, than anyone, but she keeps getting up in the morning. _That's_ faith! She is a good person. Please don't do this to her! It's not fair! Please, Lord, let these two people have their happy ending. Please. Amen."

April finished her prayer softly, head bowed. She still held Alex's hand in one hand and Meredith's in the other. April didn't dare cry. She didn't trust that she could stop once she started. Why was the world so unfair? Why did it take people in love and little babies from mothers who so desperately wanted them? She thought for a moment about Samuel. She was brought back by a sudden sound, small and timid.

"Thank you April." Meredith squeezed her hand lightly.

April looked down at her, and saw that tears were streaming down her face. April let go of their hands and crouched in front of Meredith, pulling her in to a hug. Meredith sobbed uncontrollably as April did her best to hold her.


	45. Chapter Five

Chapter Five

Maggie and Amelia rushed into the room at the sound of Meredith crying. They were surprised to find April holding her as she cried out in anguish. Maggie went to help, while Amelia went to do another neuro check.

"Mer, it's okay. Let it out. We're all here for you." She rubbed her back as she spoke.

Meanwhile, Amelia was shining the light in Alex's eyes when she thought she heard something.

"Guys, quiet for a minute!" she said urgently. The room fell silent as they waited with baited breath.

"M-M…"

Amelia turned to Meredith, grinning. "I think someone wants you!"

Meredith jumped up and was at his head in a flash. "Alex? Alex, can you hear me?"

Amelia was on the other side of the bed. "Alex, I need you to open your eyes!" she said, loudly.

He groaned slightly and grimaced. Slowly, he opened his eyes.

"Good. Follow the pen with your eyes." He did as instructed. "Excellent. Now I need you to say a word for me. Any word."

It felt like an eternity had passed. Finally, they heard him. "Meredith."

It seemed that everyone in the room exhaled at the same time. Tears cascaded down Meredith's cheeks. This time, they were tears of joy.

"Okay, Alex, almost done. Squeeze my fingers." Amelia contained her panic as she felt no response to the command. "Okay, one more time." She met with the same result. She moved to his feet.

"Push against my hands with your feet." Also nothing. "And one more time." She avoided all eye contact. I'll be back in a few minutes," she said as she hurriedly rushed out of the room, Maggie right behind her.

"Is he paralyzed?" she said, a little too loudly.

Amelia was quick to hush her. "We don't know that. We were so concerned about the head injury, that we didn't check for a spinal injury. They type of injury he sustained could potentially cause compression of his cervical discs. I want to get an MRI of his neck to be sure. It could also just be some swelling that hasn't gone down, but I think that is less likely. I'm going to take him for a post operative CT, and I need you to distract Mer. I'm going to get the MRI while I'm down there."

Maggie nodded her agreement. "Let's do it."

They walked back in to the room. "Alex, I'm going to take you for a post operative CT just to be sure." Amelia said.

Meredith looked at her, panic welling uo. "What is it?"

"I just want to make sure there were no small bleeds we didn't see before. Everything looks good, Mer. You know how head injuries are, and I just want to be thorough." She felt awful for lying to her, but felt it was for the best.

Meredith relaxed and nodded.

"Mer, it's been hours. Let me take you to get you cleaned up and get some thing to eat." Maggie said.

"I'm fine. I want to stay with Alex."

"I know, but do it for me? I'm so worried about you."

Meredith sighed. She knew Maggie would just keep hovering if she didn't relent. "Okay, fine."

April was watching the interaction between the two of them and knew something was up with Amelia and Maggie.

"I'm going to call transport." Amelia said and left the room.

"I'll be back, Mer." April said.

Meredith turned to her and gave her a hug. "Thank you for everything."

April tried to smile and nod, but the thought in her head was preventing that. She met Amelia in the hallway. "I stabilized his neck. Tell me he's not paralyzed." Her voice shook.

"I'm taking him for a CT and MRI. It may just be swelling. We don't know anything yet. Look, he's awake, and responsive. That's a hell of a lot better than just a few minutes ago. So let's stay positive,"

April nodded. I'll meet you down there. I need a minute."

"See you down there." She paused. "Hey, April?"

"Yeah?" she turned to her.

"If you have any of that faith lying around, it may be a good time to use it."

April smiled meekly and left.


	46. Chapter Six

Chapter Six

Meredith stood by the side of Alex's bed. She had seen enough, had done enough, neuro checks to know that something was wrong.

"Do you remember what happened?" As she asked, she discreetly picked up his hand and squeezed with no response. She applied increasing amounts of pressure, stopping before she knew it would hurt him.

"No, the last thing I remember was…" he noticed Maggie in the room. "uh, we were together." He grinned at her weakly.

She smiled at him, despite her growing panic. "Yeah, it happened right after that. You were running down the hall and slipped. Your head hit hard into the wall."

"That explains the headache."

"Actually, the brain surgery had a little to do with that, too." He looked shocked, so she continued. "You had a pretty massive epidural hematoma. Amelia got it out."

It was a lot to take in, and he needed to talk to Meredith alone. "Can I have some water?" he asked.

"No, but I can get you some ice chips," Maggie offered.

It was the opening Alex was hoping for. "Thanks."

She left the room, and he turned to Meredith. "Something's wrong."

She couldn't lie to him. "Alex, can you feel me squeezing your hand?" she asked, already knowing the answer.

"No. Nothing."

She quickly went to his feet. "How about now?"

He shook his head, fear clouding his face.

Meredith went back up to his head, and stroked his hair. She swallowed her fear and spoke as reassuringly as she could muster. "They're going to figure it out. I'm guessing Amelia's already ordered an MRI along with the CT." She smiled at him. "You're going to be fine."

"You don't know that. I could be a quad." A single tear rolled down his cheek. She wiped it away.

"Alex, not even an hour ago you weren't even conscious. No, I don't know. But…I have faith." She remembered the sense of calm that came over her when April prayed. She didn't know if that meant she believed or what, but she was willing to give it a shot.

He raised an eyebrow. "Since when?"

She laughed, knowing how this must sound to him. "It's new." She saw how scared he was. "Alex, I will get you through this. I'm not going anywhere."

Maggie came back with the ice chips, which she handed to Meredith. "I think they were about to come get you for your scan, and then, Mer, we can go get you fixed up." She said, cheerfully.

Meredith fed Alex some ice chips. "I'm feeling much better. I'm going to stay with Alex."

Maggie's face fell. "Mer, I really think-"

Meredith cut her off. "Did you guys really think I wouldn't find out? We know what's going on. I'm going to stay with him for the scans." She never took her eyes off of Alex.

"Okay. I'll let Amelia know." Maggie said.

"Is April with her?"

"Yeah."

"Can you please tell her I'd like to speak with her?" Meredith asked.

"Sure. You got it." Maggie left the room.

Alex looked confused. Meredith explained, "She helped me, Alex. I can't explain it, really. I just need to see this through."


	47. Chapter Seven

Chapter Seven

April arrived just as the transport team got there. Meredith spoke to them. "Could you give us a minute, please?"

They agreed and waited outside the door, which Meredith closed after bringing April inside. She looked at Meredith, an eyebrow raised in question.

"Can you do the thing again?"

It took April a second to realize Meredith was asking her to pray. Her whole face lit up at the request. "Really? Yeah, yeah of course. I'd be honored!" Realizing Alex was awake this time, she felt the need to strike a delicate balance between granting Meredith's request and making sure Alex was comfortable.

She went to the side of the bed. "Is it okay if I pray for you?" she asked Alex.

"Sure. Why not?" he said. It was a little disarming that he was not making his usual snide remarks. He was so subdued that he almost seemed like a different person. It was not a welcome change.

"Okay," April said quietly. She again took one of Alex's hands and one of Meredith's. She said a silent prayer to herself first, asking for divine guidance. This prayer, she thought, had so much more weight to it. A small part of her felt like she not only was praying for Alex's life, but also for Meredith's soul. She had to banish the thought quickly or she may not be able to proceed. Finding the words, she began, "Dear Father, thank you for bringing Alex back to us and thank you for the peace you have given to Meredith. Please continue to help Alex and bring him back to complete health. He has so much more work to do here, so many people love him and depend on him. We trust in you, Lord. Please continue to work your miracles here. Amen."

She squeezed Meredith's hand, and gently laid Alex's hand back on the bed.

"So now what?" Alex asked. He wasn't so sure about this praying thing, but it seemed important to Meredith, and he couldn't deny the fact that she said it helped her. And if it gave him a little extra help to get back to normal, he was all for it.

"Now we go get your scans." April said, with a kind smile.

Meredith gave April's arm a friendly squeeze. "Thank you again, April." She wasn't sure what to think about all of this, but she knew that she definitely felt a calmness come over her that she could not attribute to anything else.

"Of course! Anytime. If you need anything, let me know." April went and opened the doors for the transport crew. As she left the room, she found herself praying silently to God, pleading with him to help Alex, because if he wasn't okay she didn't think there was any hope of Meredith believing.

Meredith walked with Alex on the way to his scans. She hated seeing the fear on his face, and hated it even more that she couldn't do anything about it. She tried to stay right by his head so he could see her, and smiled as reassuringly as possible. She thought back to after she had been attacked, and was on her way to the operating room. She had been terrified, unable to understand what was happening and had been unable to hear. Alex had been by her side the whole way, comforting her. Having him with her was the only thing that had kept her sane. With just a look, he was able to tell her that everything would be okay. She hoped that she could bring him the same kind of comfort.

"You're going to be fine," she said. "We're going to get the scans, they'll find what's wrong, and they'll fix it." She said it as a statement of fact, no room for argument.

He nodded. He was trying his best to stay strong. He didn't want her to worry, but truth be told he had been this afraid only two other times in his life. The first was when he had been shot by a gunman on a rampage in the hospital. The other time was not for fear of his life, but rather fear of his life without Meredith. It was after she had been attacked by a patient in the hospital. When he had walked into that trauma room and had seen her lying there, beaten and battered, something inside him had broken. He had started to lose it and break down, but then had realized she needed him. He had pulled it together for her then, and would hold it together for her now.

Why was this happening? Why now, just when his life had gotten so good. Was he supposed to learn something from this, or was this yet another way the universe said, "screw you, Alex. You don't deserve happiness." If the universe wanted to hurt him, trapping him inside of his body, unable to move was one of the worst things he could imagine.

He watched her, studying every inch of her face, longing to reaching out and touch her. He thought back to their amorous encounter that morning in the on call room, and how happy they were. He promised himself in that moment that he would get better, and there would be many more of those memories in their future. He took a deep breath and braced himself for what was to come.

They reached the MRI, which Amelia had opted to do first, as she thought it was the most likely to reveal the problem. Meredith bent down and kissed him before joining Amelia, Maggie and April in the reading room.

Meredith stood behind Amelia, who was seated in front of the monitor. Meredith wrung her hands as they waited for the images. They soon had their answer: he had a herniated disc in one of the lower cervical vertebrae.

"Damn!" exclaimed Meredith. She knew this meant another surgery was necessary, and soon.

"Go prep an OR. We're going back in." She said to April, who immediately went off to take care of it.

"You got this." Meredith said to Amelia, and regretted that it came out sounding more like a question.

"I got this." Amelia reassured her.

Meredith went to Alex, who was being prepared to be taken to CT.

"How'd I do?"

"It's a herniation of C5. They're getting the OR ready." She saw the terror on his face, and she felt a pang in her heart. "Amelia's confident she can fix it." She smoothed his hair, and kissed his head "I don't want you to worry, just concentrate on getting better, Alex. I'm going to be here waiting for you. And the kids are waiting for you. You and I are just getting started and we have so much to look forward to." She tried to stop the tears in her eyes from falling, but was unsuccessful. "I didn't think I could love anyone after Derek, and I am so in love with you. So you concentrate on that. And you get better."

A few tears fell from his eyes. He had no intention of letting her, or himself, down. There was too much on the line. As she wiped his face, he grit his teeth and got mad at the universe.

"I love you so much, Mer." He managed a weak half smile. "I'm going to kick some surgery ass. I'm ready."

She laughed at that. It was so good to hear him sound a little more like himself.

They headed down to the CT, both feeling a little better The CT went quickly, and fortunately revealed no new bleeds. A short time later, they were outside the operating room.

"Okay, I'll see you after. I love you, Alex."

"I love you, Meredith."

She bent down and kissed him, then he was taken in to the OR. Meredith turned to head to the gallery, and Amelia stopped her.

"I can't have you in there, Meredith."

"I know. I'll watch from the gallery."

"No, Meredith." She started to protest, so Amelia continued, "You pull my focus. I find myself looking up at you, and seeing that look on your face, and it takes me back to Derek. Is that what you want? I will get him through this, but I need to do it without you in the gallery. Do you understand?" Her voice broke a little when she mentioned Derek, but was otherwise authoritative.

Meredith was not happy about being shut out, but she wanted what was best for Alex, and if that meant waiting elsewhere, then she would do it. She nodded.

Amelia returned the nod, as if to acknowledge that she would do her very best. She took her scrub cap out of her pocket, and put it on as she turned to go in to the OR.


	48. Chapter Eight

Chapter Eight

Meredith turned and leaned on the door to the scrub room, tears in her eyes. She wrapped her arms around herself and gnawed on her lower lip. It had grown late, and the hallways usually teeming with life were deserted. It echoed the emptiness she felt at being banished from the gallery, unable to know what was happening with Alex.

She knew he was in good hands. April had gone in to do the guided intubation, Owen scrubbed in just for back up, and Amelia was ready. They were all as prepared as possible, yet she was as unprepared as ever to face the hours long wait alone. She found herself walking, never having made a conscious decision of where to go, and was soon at the doors of the hospital chapel. Her hand reached out to touch the brushed nickel handle and rested there a moment before pulling the door open.

After a moment's hesitation, she stepped inside. Slowly, she made her way forward down the row of pews, allowing her hand to to slide along the tops of the mahogany benches. She selected a location in the middle of the row, and sat, absorbing the silence.

It wasn't the first time that she had been in this room; in fact, she had visited a few times. Sometimes she went just for the silence, to escape the chaotic madness that the hospital could be on occasion. Other times, she would go when trying to work something out. Those times, she would talk to Derek to seek out any guidance he may have to offer. And yet other times, she found herself there when something bad was happening. She didn't know why she went during those times, but it had just seemed like the thing to do. This, however, was none of these times

She had found herself replaying April's prayer from earlier, "She has been through more, survived more, than anyone, but she keeps getting up in the morning. That's faith!" Was April right? Did she have faith? As she contemplated this, snippets of the horrors of her life flashed through her mind like the trailer for a very angsty movie: her mother's Alzheimer's, the explosion of the bomb, her drowning, George's death, Derek shot, her miscarriage, the plane crash, Lexie's death, Mark's death, nearly bleeding out during her in the dark c-section, Derek's death, being assaulted in the hospital. It seemed like too much for an army of people to have gone through, yet this was her story. Why had she continued to get up in the morning?

She didn't know how long she had been sitting like that when she spoke. "I – " She began, but emotion threatened to derail the conversation. She cleared her throat as she continued. "I don't know what to do here. So I'm just going to talk." Tears welled in her eyes. "All of this crap – sorry – I mean, what's the point? I got all whole and healthy and Derek died. And I got through it, and I found Riggs. And his freaking – sorry – his wife comes back from the dead. And I'm okay with that, too, because if it had been Derek, I would have been gone. And now, unbelievably, I fell in love with Alex. It's finally time to be happy, and he slips on the damn – sorry – floor, hits his head and may be paralyzed? Seriously?! Am I such a horrible person that these things keep happening? I guess I'm just asking for a break. Please just let all the awful stop and let happiness win for once. Please let Alex be okay. I can't imagine living without him."

She stopped speaking when she felt someone sit next to her. She jumped up when she saw it was April. "Is he…?" she was too emotional to finish the sentence.

"He's out of surgery. Nerve signals are all intact. It looks good."

Meredith sunk down on the bench in sheer relief. She took a few steadying breaths and turned to April.

"I didn't know how to do it, so I just talked."

April smiled at her. "That's kind of it. Prayer is a conversation between you and God. He doesn't care how it sounds. He just wants you to talk to Him."

"Yeah?"

April nodded. "Yeah. You did really well."

Meredith smiled. "Thanks."

April placed her hand on Meredith's. You ready to go see him?

Meredith nodded, brushing a tear from her eyes.

"Come on," April said, gently, leading her from the room.

A small crowd had assembled outside of his room when she got there, including Amelia, Owen Maggie, Arizona, Richard and Bailey. She recognized what this was – they were keeping vigil. She had seen enough of them to last a hundred lifetimes, but it was comforting to have her hospital family all there for them.

Amelia stepped forward when she saw Meredith. Her eyes were tired, but shone with happiness. "It went well. Very well. We took a bone graft from his right hip, so he may have some soreness for a while. Nerve signals were all intact. I want to use early ambulation protocol, so we're going to get him up and walking in a few hours."

Meredith went to her. "Thank you, Amelia." She reached out and pulled her into a hug, and Amelia hugged her back tightly.

After a minute, Amelia pulled away. "Go. Go to your guy."

Meredith smiled, and turned to go into Alex's room. She pulled a chair to the side of the bed, then kissed him lightly before sitting down. She held his hand, and soon began to feel the exhaustion of the day. Still holding his hand, she leaned forward and rested her head on the edge of the bed.


	49. Chapter Nine

**A/N: Thank you for all of your comments. They truly make my day! Sorry for the delayed updates. My job has been extra demanding lately, now that we are in full season here in Florida. Bear with me, I'm not done!:)**

Chapter Nine

She was awakened by the squeezing of her hand. Slowly, she opened her eyes to see Alex's hand squeezing hers. She came to full awareness and shot up out of her chair.

"Hey, you're awake!" she moved to the head of the bed, and positioned herself so he could see her. He would have to wear a neck brace for a while, and couldn't turn his head.

"I can move my fingers." He croaked.

Her eyes glistened with tears of joy. Before she had a chance to respond, Amelia's voice resounded through the room.

"Of course you can. Did you doubt my abilities?"

She strode confidently to Alex's bedside, and picked up his hands. "Squeeze my fingers." She exhaled quietly as he did as commanded. "Excellent!" She moved to his feet. "Push against my hands." She was glad they couldn't hear her heart pounding against her rib cage. She couldn't, however, contain her smile as he pushed strongly against her hands. She went to the head of the bed. "Follow the pen with your eyes." He did as instructed, and she was confident that he was neurologically intact.

"Okay, Alex. It's time to get to work. We are going to get you up and walking. I will tell you it is most definitely going to suck at first." She recalled her early ambulation after her brain tumor surgery, and shuddered lightly.

He looked at Meredith and gave her his famous crooked grin. "It's worth it," he replied gruffly, his throat still irritated from the intubation and spinal surgery.

"I'll give you guys a couple of minutes, and I'll be back." She left the room.

"How are you feeling?" she asked, smoothing his hair.

"Honestly? Like I've been hit by a truck." He saw the grimace on her face and had regretted the words as soon as they had been said. "Sorry. Bad choice of words."

She shook her head. It was an ironic comment, a reminder of the way his accident had come too close to mirroring Derek's demise.

"It's fine. I'm just so grateful that you're going to be okay. We get to have our future, Alex." Tears of relief streaked her cheeks.

His face lit up with a full smile. "We're going to have a great future. You, me and the kids." He was interrupted by the return of Amelia.

"Okay, you ready to get to work?" She had a couple of nurses with her.

"Uh, just a second." He turned back to Meredith. "I can't wait for our future, and to share everything with you. But I really don't want you to hear me scream like a girl."

She chuckled. "Okay. I'll go check on the kids, and I'll be back later." She leaned over to kiss him.

"Don't scare them. Just tell them I hurt my neck, and I'm fine. Sometimes Zola needs to talk, and she does it better over ice cream. Make sure Bailey gets to play trucks. There's too much girly stuff over there, and he needs time to be a little dude. And give Ellis extra snuggles for me."

She laughed, but was genuinely touched by his display of love for her children. "I'll be sure to take good care of them, just for you. I'll be back." She gave him one last kiss and left the room.

As she headed for the elevators, she thought about how Alex had stepped up to be there for her kids without being asked. In the years since Derek's death, he had run countless errands, had helped Zola with her homework, had even learned to do her hair (and now did it better than Meredith), nursed them through several illnesses, gave them pep talks, had taught Zola how to ride a bike with training wheels, had bought Bailey his first bike when the lad had been jealous of his big sister's new feat, how he had memorized Ellis's favorite lullabies, and countless other heroic acts. He was their de facto father, she realized. She knew about his father issues, like he knew about hers. She was certain it had started as a way to make sure they didn't feel the sting the two of them had grown up with, but somewhere along the way the lines had blurred. She felt a lump in her throat, and knew what she had to do. She picked up her phone and dialed.

Back in the hospital room, Alex was being helped up by Amelia and several nurses. Normally, Amelia would have relegated this task to her resident, but the stakes were too high with this patient.

"No, stop! I can't do this!" He screamed.

Amelia grimaced. "I know, Alex. But you can do this. Come on, just a little more."

He locked eyes with her. "I hate you!" He growled.

She gave him a self-deprecating smile. "Good. Use it. Hate me all you want. But you're doing this!" She took a small step back.

"Go to hell!" He advanced towards her.

"That all you got?" she taunted, taking another small step back.

"Bitch!" He grunted, moving forward another step.

"Come on, Iowa! " she referenced his state school education, knowing how it would irritate him, as she took the last step back.

He let out a primal scream and closed the gap between them and reached the chair. Amelia and the nurses helped him down.

"Good. Rest. I'll be back in a few and we'll have some more fun!" she said, irritatingly cheery on purpose. It would help him to be mad.

"Bite me!"

She chuckled softly and left the room.


	50. Part Two Chapter Ten

Chapter Ten

Meredith entered the house, a grocery bag tucked under her arm. The nanny met her at the door, carrying Ellis.

"Hey baby girl. How are you feeling?" she kissed her forehead, relieved to feel it still cool. The little girl eagerly went to her mother.

"Do you mind if I have some time with them?" she said to the nanny.

"No, of course not, Dr. Grey! It will give me time to finish putting away the laundry."

Meredith smiled her thanks, and the nanny headed up the stairs.

"Hey, guys!" she said, trying to sound as cheery as possible. Look what I got!" She took the item from the shopping bag, revealing a half gallon ice cream container.

"Ice cream!" shouted Bailey, who she noticed was wearing a pink tiara. Meredith couldn't help chuckling to herself. She would definitely make sure he got his truck time.

Zola regarded her mom more carefully. She was young, but smart. Her mom didn't come home during the day, and she certainly didn't bring ice cream in the middle of the day. Something was wrong.

"Come on, guys! Let's go have some ice cream!" She started for the kitchen, but noticed Zola wasn't moving. "Come on, Zo!" she said brightly.

"No. Something's wrong." She was afraid to move. The last time there was ice cream for no reason it was Uncle Alex bringing it to tell her that her mom had been hurt. She took a quick inventory. She didn't know who was hurt, but it could be her aunts or it could be Uncle Alex. Whoever it was, she didn't want the answer.

She set Ellis down in her playpen, and setting the ice cream on the table, sat down next to her oldest daughter.

She stroked her face gently. "Sometimes I forget what a smart girl you are."

Zola's breathing quickened, and she was fighting the urge to run from the room.

Seeing her daughter's distress, Meredith continued.

"Something happened, but it's okay now. Uncle Alex…"

"No!" she screamed. Not her Uncle.

Meredith gathered her quickly in her arms, surprised by the reaction. "Zo Zo, he's okay. He's okay!" she repeated it over and over until she calmed down. Bailey had returned from the kitchen, and watched with tears in his eyes. Ellis watched the scene, alarmed.

"What h-h-happened?" she said, between sobs.

"He fell, and hurt his neck a little. That's all." Meredith felt terrible. She had failed at not scaring her "He's the one who told me to get ice cream for you."

Zola calmed down. "Really?"

Meredith brightened. "Really, Zo. I wouldn't lie to you." She stared earnestly into her daughter's dark brown eyes.

After a minute, Zola decided she was telling the truth. "Okay."

Meredith let out a breath she didn't realize she had been holding.

"Okay," she repeated. "There's something I want to talk to you about. Do you want that ice cream now?"

Zola nodded. If Uncle Alex had told her to bring it, it was okay.

They went in to the kitchen, Meredith gathering Ellis up along the way, and put her in the highchair in the kitchen. She went about the business of getting the dishes and spoons for the ice cream, hoping the next part of the conversation went better.

Once they had all been settled with their ice cream, Meredith began. "I've been thinking about Uncle Alex. He does a lot for you guys, doesn't he?"

"Yeah, he always helps me with my homework, and makes breakfast and plays with us," Zola started.

"And loves us," Bailey added sweetly.

She tousled his hair. "He sure does. That's what I want to talk to you about. How would you like it if he was more than your Uncle?" she struggled with the phrasing.

"You mean like a dad?" Zola asked, a spoonful of ice cream hovering halfway to her mouth.

"Your dad will always be your dad. But I was thinking maybe he could be your legal guardian."

"What does that mean?" Zola asked.

"Well, it means that everything stays like it is now, but he would be able to make decisions for you guys if he needed to."

Zola took a bite of ice cream. "Do I still call him Uncle Alex?" she said thoughtfully.

"You can call him whatever you would like."

Bailey watched his sister. Ellis ate her ice cream, or at least tried to. She was wearing more of it than she had eaten.

"How about Daddy Alex?" She decided.

Meredith's eyes instantly filled with tears. "I think he would really love that, Zo." She said quietly.

Zola grinned widely. "When is _Daddy_ Alex coming home?" she asked.

"Oh, not for a few days, sweetie. He has to wait for his neck to get a little better."

"Can I see him?"

"Maybe in one or two days. He needs to rest right now."

Zola nodded, finishing her ice cream. "I have an idea!" she jumped out of her chair and took off for the living room.

Meredith turned her attention to Ellis, and seeing the ice cream all over her, she laughed, then grabbed her phone. "Ellis, look at Mama!" Ellis smiled, more ice cream spilling out of her mouth. "Oh, that's perfect!"

"What about me, Mama!" She turned to see her only son making a silly face, ice cream all around his mouth.

She laughed heartily and took his picture, too. "Daddy Alex is going to love that!" She said, relishing the new moniker. She couldn't wait to tell him.

She started cleaning up, and several minutes later, Zola came back to the kitchen.

"I made this." She held out a construction paper card. The front featured a picture of a family in front of their house. She had to hold back tears, as it was the first time since Derek had died that she had drawn a dad.

"Open it, mom!" she said, excitedly.

Inside the card, printed as neatly in crayon as she was able, it said "Get well soon, Daddy Alex! We love you! Love, Zola, Bailey and Ellis."

Meredith was unable to hold back the tears any longer. She crouched down to her daughter. "Oh, Zo, this is so beautiful!" She wrapped her in a hug.

"Do you think he will like it?" She said.

There's only one thing he will like more," she said, handing her the card. "A picture of you with the card." She took her phone back out. "Say cheese!"

"How about I say Daddy?" she said.

The view got blurry, as Meredith snapped the picture through tears.


	51. Chapter Eleven

Chapter Eleven

"Come on, Alex! There's a 90 year old stroke victim down the hall that moves better than this!" Amelia chided him.

He gritted his teeth. "I'm gonna…"

"Gonna what? Huh? You can't even get to me!" she pushed.

"Screw….you…" he panted, sliding his foot forward.

"Ooh, tough talk!" she took another step back.

"You're a masochist!" He grunted.

"True. All very true." She slid another foot back, as his goal was in sight.

"I'm not kidding. I really hate you!"

"Good! Hate me more. Hate me with everything you got!"

He screamed as he made the last step. The nurses and Amelia helped in to the bed as he dissolved in tears.

The nurses left. Amelia stayed, and rubbed his back. "I know," she said softly, and meant it.

As she stood there, tending to her patient, Meredith appeared in the doorway. Amelia instantly put her finger to her lips, telling Meredith not to reveal her presence yet.

Meredith looked concerned, but obeyed.

He was regaining his composure. "I still hate you."

"Good. Hate me as much as you want. But I saved your life. Remember that." She spoke in a teasing tone. The man in the bed was very much like a brother to her. When she was certain he was composed, she said, "Hey! Look who's here!"

He looked away and quickly wiped his tears as Meredith entered the room.

Amelia approached her, speaking quietly. "I put him through a lot today. He needs to rest."

Meredith nodded her agreement.

"Alex, I look forward to this again tomorrow!" she said happily.

"Go to hell!" He repeated.

She chuckled and left the room.

He was now sitting up in the bed, and she sat on the edge of the bed, facing him. She set a bag on the chair next to her.

"How'd it go today?" she asked.

"Great. I crushed it." He sounded a little less confident than his usual self.

"I brought you some things I thought might make you feel a little better."

" _You_ make me feel better." He held her hands, so happy to be able to do so.

She took her phone from her pocket, and opened to the photos. She showed him Ellis wearing the ice cream and Bailey's funny face ice cream mustache.

"There's one more," she said after his laughter died down. She flipped to the picture of Zola, holding the card. He studied it carefully.

"Is that all of us?" he asked.

"Yeah," she answered quietly, knowing he didn't understand the entirety of it yet. She reached in to the bag and pulled out the card. "Zo was sad she couldn't come see you yet, and wanted to make you feel better."

She discreetly turned on the video portion of her phone as she handed him the card.

He looked at her suspiciously as he took it. He again studied the front of the card. Smiling, he opened it. He read and re-read the words. His smile dissolved into surprise. His heart rate quickened, and his breaths came quicker. He looked up at her, not even noticing that she was videotaping him. "Daddy Alex?"

She reached in to her bag and withdrew a manilla envelope.

"Yeah, well the kids and I had a talk. We talked about everything that you do for them, and they decided you're like a dad to them. And you are. So, Zola has changed your name to…"

"Daddy Alex." He said it on a whisper, unable to believe it.

"Yeah," she said brushing a tear from her eyes. Her heart pounded as she handed him the manilla envelope. "There's more."

He reached for it with shaking hands. Still not realizing she was videotaping him. He opened the envelope and extracted a packet.

"Affadavit of Guardianship" was written at the top.

He read aloud. "Alexander Michael Karev, herein referred to as the Guardian of the children of Meredith Grey…" his voice trailed off as he looked up at her through tear filled eyes. "What is this, Mer?"

"This," she said, "Makes you the legal guardian of Zola, Bailey and Ellis. No one will ever question your authority over them, should the need arise. And I don't know if you've noticed, but I tend to be a bit disaster prone." They both laughed, then she turned serious. "You've been acting as their father for years. I should have done this sooner. I'm sorry."

Tears spilled down his cheeks, and she put the phone down to gently lean in and hold him. He was overwhelmed at the feeling of complete acceptance of him not just as her lover, but as an acceptable guardian to her children. It was a feeling he had yearned for his whole life, and to have it suddenly in front of him was overpowering.

"Shhh, Amelia says you need rest." She did her best to comfort him, but the hospital bed and the neck brace made it difficult.

"So I take it that you want this?" She teased.

"Yeah. I really want this." He said quietly.

"I never want you worrying that someone is going to take them away. "

He stared, alternating between the beautiful card, the cherished papers and the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Suddenly, the pain of the day faded away. He wanted to get up and work again right now, he had a family waiting for him back home.

"I can't wait to get to work tomorrow." He said.


	52. Chapter Twelve

Chapter Twelve

It was late, but Meredith couldn't sleep after the events of the day. She sat on the sofa with a glass of wine, half-heartedly skimming a magazine, when the front door opened. Amelia appeared a second later.

"Hey." Meredith greeted her, quietly.

"Hey. What are you still doing up?" she asked. She crossed over to her and sat next to her on the sofa.

"I couldn't sleep." She set the wine glass and magazine on the coffee table and stared straight ahead.

Amelia observed her for a moment. She tucked a piece of hair behind her ear as she spoke. "Does this have to do with the card Zola made Alex?"

Meredith turned to Amelia, eyes widened in surprise.

"I went to check on him tonight. He fell asleep holding it." Amelia continued.

Meredith smiled, happy that this has brought him so much joy. "No. Well, yes and no." She recounted the day's events for Amelia, including Zola's reaction to finding out about his injury, Alex's new nickname, the card and the guardianship papers. Amelia sat back on the couch, her head resting on the back of it, speechless.

Meredith reached out and gently touched her arm. "Amelia, are you okay with this?"

A tear fell from Amelia's eyes. "Daddy Alex, huh? That Zola." She said, quietly.

Meredith scooted to her and put an arm around her. Amelia rested her head on Meredith's shoulder. "Yeah. Tell me about it." She said, on a laugh.

They sat quietly together for a few minutes. Amelia then raised her head and looked up at Meredith, a small smile on her lips. "Derek would be so proud of these kids, Mer." She sat up and looked at her earnestly. "And he would want you to be happy." She nodded to herself. "It's the right thing to do."

Meredith relaxed. "You're sure you're okay with this?"

"I may be your dead husband's sister that lives in your house and talks too much and drives you crazy, but yeah. I'm sure. He really loves all of you. That's what Derek would have wanted." She sighed and leaned back against the couch. "If it couldn't be him, it's what he would have wanted."

Meredith looked down at her hands, folded in her lap. "My sister." She said, quietly.

Amelia sat up, tilted her head and looked at Meredith with a quizzical expression. "What?"

Meredith lifted her head and met her eyes. "You're _my_ sister. Not my dead husband's sister. Nancy, Kathleen and Lizzie are my dead husband's sisters. You're mine." She played with her fingers as she spoke.

Amelia gazed at her, mouth slightly opened. After a moment, she looked down, and swallowed. She again met Meredith's eyes. "Oh." She smiled tightly. It was all she could bring herself to say.

Meredith had called her a sister before, but there was usually a joke or depreciating remark involved. This was full acceptance of her as her family, something Amelia never thought she would earn.

Meredith again scooted to her. She put her head on Amelia's shoulder, and Amelia instinctively wrapped a protective arm around her. She remembered her biological sisters who had shunned her. Who didn't come to her wedding. Who didn't come when she had her brain tumor removed. Meredith was there for all of it.

"It's good to have a sister again." She murmured into Meredith's hair.

"Thank you for saving his life." Meredith whispered, tears in her eyes.

Amelia kissed the top of her head and hugged her tighter.


	53. Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Thirteen

Meredith stood outside the hospital door. It had been nearly a week, and Alex was doing much better. He was able to sit up in bed, and the neck brace could be taken off for thirty minute intervals. She had been forbidden to be present during his grueling therapy sessions, but got regular reports from Amelia, at Meredith's insistence. He had been pushing himself to get better. In fact, by the time she was allowed to see him in the afternoons, he looked exhausted. Meredith worried that he had been overdoing it, a concern that had been validated two days ago when she learned he had almost collapsed. Fortunately, Amelia had been right there and had prevented any injury, and forced him to rest. However, he was not being co-operative, wanting badly to get home to his family. Meredith and Amelia agreed it was time to bring the kids for a visit, which was about to take place.

Meredith had spent the last couple of days preparing them, so they wouldn't be afraid when they saw him. She had described the neck brace, even though he wouldn't be wearing it during the visit, as well as why his head was shaved in one spot, "so they could put some medicine there," as she had put it. She told them how he had to be careful, and couldn't move his neck very much, and he couldn't pick them up or play with them right now, but would be able to once he was completely healed. She told them how excited he was to see them, and how he looked at their pictures every day. She was confident in her preparations that the visit would go smoothly.

Amelia was in the room with Alex, waiting to make sure the visit went well, but mainly to make sure he didn't over exert himself. She went to the door when she saw Meredith, and turned to Alex. He was sitting in a chair, wearing street clothes. A few pillows were propped up behind him to support his neck while the neck brace was off.

"Remember, no picking them up. Stay in the chair. You ready?" she asked.

"Oh yeah." His heart pounded, and he wiped the sweat from his palms.

Amelia smiled at him warmly, then turned to open the door. She knelt down to her niece and nephew.

"Hey guys! Now, you have to be gentle, okay? No jumping or climbing on Alex. His neck is still getting better."

They nodded, and she moved out of the way.

"Daddy Alex!" Zola yelled and ran to him, Bailey close behind.

"Careful, guys, remember?" Amelia gently reminded them.

Zola stopped just before she had launched into his arms. "Sorry." She looked down, frowning.

"It's okay, Zo." Alex said, soothingly.

"Hey guys, do you want to sit with Daddy Alex?" Meredith asked brightly.

Zola looked up, excited again, and nodded. Bailey was jumping up and down.

Meredith laughed. "Okay, but you have to be really still. Can you do that, Bay?"

He nodded, much calmer.

Meredith handed Ellis, who was sleeping, to Amelia. She picked up Zola first and nestled her in Alex's right arm, then repeated the process with Bailey, settling him on his left side, again reminding him to be still. She stayed within an arm's reach of Bailey, in case the young boy forgot. She took out her camera and got a picture of the three of them. As she watched Alex talk and laugh with them, she thought that she had never loved him more.

Amelia came and stood next to Meredith, still holding Ellis. Meredith looked at her, happy to see she was smiling. The two had continued to grow closer since their talk a few nights ago, and Meredith was so grateful that she was accepting of Alex's new role in her children's lives.

"Amelia, get in the picture with them!"

Amelia shifted position, a small smile on her face. "Really?"

Meredith stopped fiddling with the camera and looked at her questioningly. "Are you kidding? You're our family, too, _and_ you saved his life! Now get in there!" she chided playfully.

Amelia smiled through the tears in her eyes as she posed for the picture.

In an act of perfect timing, Maggie had come in to visit. Meredith ushered her over to get in the picture with the others, which she did promptly.

As she was getting ready to take the picture, Zola spoke up. "Take a selfie, mom, so you can be in it, too!"

Meredith laughed and changed the setting on the phone. She got in back of Alex, and lined up the picture. "Okay guys, say family!"

"Family!" they said, cheerfully, as she snapped the picture.

"Daddy Alex, when are you coming home?" Bailey asked.

Meredith watched as his smile grew wider than she had ever seen it.

"I think not for a few days, buddy." He said. He watched as Bailey's smile disappeared.

"But I miss you."

Alex frowned, sad to disappoint him. "I miss you too, pal. But it won't be too much longer."

Amelia handed Ellis to Maggie and walked around to the front of the chair and cleared her throat. "Actually, Alex, I was going to talk to you about that. Your recovery is going really well. If you promise to follow all of the instructions and continue with outpatient therapy, I think I can let you go home tomorrow."

"How bout that, Bay? I get to come home tomorrow!" He said, happily.

Both Bailey and Zola cheered. Meredith leaned down and gently kissed Alex on the head.

Amelia had been watching him intently for any signs of distress. She saw the tiniest flicker of a grimace, that would have been missed by anyone not looking for it.

"Mer." She said it quietly while looking at her sister, who knew exactly what she was asking her to do.

"Okay, guys! If Daddy Alex is coming home tomorrow, he has got to get his rest. We are going to get some dinner, and you will see him tomorrow!"

They protested lightly, but understood. Meredith lifted Bailey from him first, then Zola. She took Ellis from Maggie, and lowered her to Alex, who kissed her still sleeping head.

They had made their way to the door, Maggie holding Bailey's hand, when Zola turned back and ran to Alex. Amelia went to stop her, but Meredith gently put her hand on her arm. She knew her daughter needed this.

Zola gently held his hand. "I love you, Daddy Alex. See you tomorrow."

With tears in his eyes he said, "I love you so much, Zola. I can't wait to come home to you guys!"

Meredith could see he was getting overwhelmed. She went over to them.

"Zo, Daddy Alex has to rest now. You''ll see him tomorrow. Okay?" she said, gently.

Zola nodded, and Meredith motioned to Amelia, who came and took Ellis again, and she and Maggie took the kids out of the room to give Meredith and Alex a minute to say goodnight.

Once they had left the room, she got his neck brace and put it back on him. She sat on the arm of the chair and rubbed his back, seeing that he was still very emotional.

"Hey, you okay?" She leaned in to him, worry evident in her eyes.

He closed his eyes a minute and took a deep breath. "Yeah. It's just…"

"Different when it's your kids?" she offered softly.

He sighed contentedly as he opened his eyes to meet her gaze. "It's like nothing I ever imagined, Mer. I just want to be the best dad I can be for them. I want to give them the world! It's so hard to be in here, even for just one more day, you know?"

She gave a small chuckle. "Try six weeks!"

He grimaced. "Mer, I'm sorry. I honestly forgot."

She laughed. "It's really okay. Now, do you want me to help you get back in the bed?"

"No, I can do it myself. Go get _our_ kids some dinner."

She stood and leaned over him, and kissed him tenderly. "Good night, Alex."

"Night, Mer. I really love you, you know that?" he said.

"Yeah. I really love you, too." She kissed him one more time, then turned to leave.

"Hey, send Amelia in. I never really thanked her for saving my life."


	54. Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fourteen

Amelia entered the room a minute later to find Alex walking to the bed. "Hey, Mer said you wanted to see me."

He reached the bed, and eased himself in. "Yeah. Have a seat."

She went to the side of the bed and held up the covers while he pulled his legs in. She saw the pain flash across his face as he did so. She leaned forward to check the cervical collar. He reached up and grabbed her hands gently. "Amelia, sit down," he said, gently.

She sat slowly on the edge of the bed, facing him. She smiled at him, eyebrows raised. "What's up?"

"I've spent most of this past week yelling at you. I just wanted to say…"

"You don't have to say anything, Alex. I was just doing what I know to do."

"Will you let me talk?" he laughed.

She smiled at him. "Sorry."

"I wanted to tell you thank you. Thank you for saving my life, and thank you for pushing me to get walking, as much as I hated you at the time." He chuckled.

She looked down at her hands, not saying anything for a moment. "I was scared." She finally admitted. "After the first surgery, when you couldn't move your arms or legs."

His forehead furrowed, and he reached out and touched her arm. "Hey, I'm okay, and that's thanks to you." He said softly, but insistently, squeezing her arm gently.

She looked up at him and gave him a quick smile. "Thanks." She then looked down again. She swallowed hard at the lump in her throat that was put there by that awful memory of when she thought she had paralyzed him.

He studied his friend. He felt badly for not realizing how difficult this had been on her. "I also was hoping you could help me with something. But it has to stay between us."

She raised her eyes and gave him a quizzical expression. "Okay…" she said, drawing out the word.

"Can you arrange it so you drive me home tomorrow? I have to make a stop along the way. It won't take long, but it's something I have to do."

"And why don't you want Meredith to know?" she pressed.

"Because. It's just something I need to do myself. Can you help me or not?" he asked, a little impatiently.

"Yes, I will help you." She stood up. But you have to rest tonight. I'll figure it out." She turned to leave.

"Amelia?"

She turned back to him.

"Seriously, thank you."

She smiled meekly and nodded before leaving the room.

A short time later, Amelia and Meredith were in Meredith's bedroom, getting it ready for Alex's homecoming.

"Tell me again why he won't let me pick him up?" Meredith asked, while stripping the sheets from the bed.

Amelia took the fitted sheet she was holding and started placing it on the bed. "Because, Mer, he wants you and the kids here. He wants everything as normal for them as possible. He's very protective of you all."

Meredith smiled. He was the one injured, yet Amelia was right. He was very protective over them.

"And you're sure you're okay taking him home?" she sought to confirm.

"Yeah, it's no big deal, Mer. Now let's finish this up. I want to get to bed." She looked at the room. "I still think you should have put a hospital bed downstairs."

"You know he wouldn't use it." She countered.

Amelia nodded. "Yeah, you're right." She placed the last of the pillows on the bed. "You good?" she asked.

"Yeah, I think so. Thanks, Amelia."

"No problem. Good night, Mer."

"Night."

Amelia left the room and closed the door. She leaned against the door and sighed. She just wanted to get out of there before her sister could ask more questions, and force her to betray Alex's confidence. The thing was, she didn't know what it was that she would be betraying. She went to her room, and closed the door. She didn't think she'd be getting much sleep tonight.

The next day, Amelia arrived early at the hospital. She entered Alex's room, ready with the discharge papers.

"So, you gonna tell me where we're going?" she asked, as he signed the papers she had just reviewed with him.

"Uh, not yet." He said, grimacing as he bent to put his shoes on.

"Seriously, Alex. You have to start accepting some help." She said, as she bent down to put his shoes on for him.

"I have to do it myself." He said, through gritted teeth.

"See, that's the thing. You don't. You're just too stubborn to realize it." She finished putting his other shoe on. "Sometimes people need help. Like, I don't know, the driver of a car needs to know where they're going!" she exclaimed, rising from her crouched position, gesturing with her arms.

He ran his hands though his hair. "Look, I just really need you to trust me on this." He raised his eyebrows and widened his eyes. "Please?"

She blew out a sign. "Fine."

He smiled. "Thank you."

She walked to the door, and grabbed a wheelchair she had waiting outside. "You ready to go?"

"Hell yeah." He got up from the bed and slowly made his way to the chair.

Amelia helped him into the chair, and helped him put his feet on the door guards. She released the brake, and handed him his bag. With one last glance at the room, they headed out.

Minutes later, they were in Amelia's car, headed to the mystery destination. "Okay, Alex, you have to give me some idea now."

"Head towards I-5."

She shook her head. "Okay."

They drove in silence for several miles. He debated internally whether to divulge the location, deciding it's best to wait.

He saw the exit was approaching, and he observed her as he spoke.

"Mer told me that you were really great about my new role in the kids' lives. I really appreciate that," he began. "You're, uh, going to take the Lakeview Boulevard exit." He said, watching her carefully.

"Okay." Suddenly, her face blanched. "Alex, where are we going?" she said, her voice tight.

"I need to make sure one more person is okay with this." He said.


	55. Chapter Fifteen (02-25 20:40:14)

Chapter Fifteen

With shaking hands, Amelia pulled the car up in front of their destination. She looked up at the sign, then looked at him.

"I can't do this." She said.

"Fine. Wait here. I'll walk."

She didn't move.

"It might take me a while, though."

She just continued to stare at the sign.

"Okay." He started to open the door.

"Fine." She said, quietly. She took a deep breath, and took one last look at the sign, which read, "Lakeview Cemetery."

They slowly drove through the scenic winding road, not speaking. After a few minutes, she stopped the car. She parked and got out. Keeping her head down, she walked around the front of the car to the passenger side, opened his door, and helped him out of the car, numbly. She walked with him to the gravesite, looking down until reaching the destination. She forced herself to look at the headstone, engraved "Derek Christopher Shepherd" followed by the dates of his birth and death. She swallowed hard to avoid crying, and settled him on the bench in front of his grave.

"I'll be waiting at the car. Call me when you're ready." She said.

He simply nodded, trying to find the words to begin. He stared at the grave for several minutes before speaking. She started down the small hill to the car, but curiosity got the better of her. She stayed hidden behind a tree, but still within earshot.

"Hey. It's Alex." He began, awkwardly. "I, uh, I don't know if you can hear me or whatever. But, uh, Meredith and I are kind of a thing now. More than that. I, uh, love her. I love her more than I've ever loved anyone. And I love your kids. Like, I'm crazy in love with all of them. Look, I know we were never close. I just want you to know that I'm not the same guy I used to be. I'm not that jackass any more. I'm gonna be there for her, for all of them. I'm gonna show up! I'm gonna be the dad I never had! But I'm not going to try to take your place. You, man, you were the best. You didn't even have to try. I'm going to remind them of you, tell them stories, I'm gonna love them. I'm gonna love them like you would have wanted." He rubbed his face, and spoke quieter. "I don't know if you know this, but I got hurt. I fell, and rammed my head into a wall. And I almost died. I know how hard you must have fought to get back to her. She's worth fighting for, worth every ounce of pain. But I got lucky. Amelia saved me." He paused for a moment, struck for the first time by the similarities in their injuries, and the vastly different outcomes. For the first time since he started speaking, he was choked up.

"Amelia, she _really_ misses you, man. Like your whole family, they wouldn't come to her wedding. And they didn't show up when she had her brain tumor. Yeah, imagine that, a neurosurgeon with a frigging brain tumor. So she hasn't had it easy. I'm doing my best to look out for her, but if you can maybe pull some strings for her up there, she could really use a break."

Amelia stood there, stunned, tears streaming down her cheeks. She had not expected to be part of Alex's conversation with Derek.

"What I'm trying to say, I guess, is that you don't have to worry. I got them. I got all of them. If you can just keep the bad stuff from happening, that would be awesome. But you can rest easy. They're going to be loved. And, uh, thanks."

He sat there for a couple of minutes, regaining his composure. He stood, and turned to the car to call Amelia, but was shocked to find her right behind him. She threw her arms around him.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have listened."

He rubbed her back. "It's okay. I'm kind of glad you heard it."

She broke from the hug, and wiped her tears. "Let's get you home." She took his arm, and they slowly made their way to the car. She got him settled inside.

"I'll be okay here. You need to go talk to him."

Fresh tears sprang to her eyes, and she nodded. She turned, and made her way up the hill.

She returned several minutes later and got behind the wheel, facing straight ahead, face streaked with tears. They sat in silence for several minutes.

"You okay?" he finally asked.

She nodded, then after a moment, turned to face him. "Thank you for that."

He nodded. "You saved my life. Seemed like the least I could do."

She reached over and squeezed his arm. "Let's get you home to your family."


	56. Chapter Sixteen (02-27 19:12:08)

Chapter Sixteen

They rode in silence for a few miles. Finally, Amelia had to know. "Why me? You could have had Maggie take you. Lots of other people could have taken you. Heck, you could have even taken an Uber! So I have to know. Why me?"

He looked at her, his eyebrows raised in amusement. "An Uber? Really?" He sighed, and resumed looking forward. "You needed to talk to him. I knew you wouldn't go on your own, or if you'd go if I told you where we were going." He looked at her. "I know how much you miss him." He paused for a minute, then shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know. I thought you could use a friend."

She looked at him and offered him a weak smile. "Thanks."

He returned the smile. "You're welcome."

He had messaged Meredith to let her know they would be there in ten minutes, and they rode the rest of the way in a comfortable silence.

After parking the car in the driveway, Amelia had gotten out and helped Alex out of the car. She helped him up the wooden steps leading to the porch, and opened the front door.

"Surprise!" yelled Zola, Bailey and Meredith. Zola held up a sign she had made that said, "Welcome home, Daddy Alex!" Bailey held up a drawing he had made. Meredith was holding Ellis, who squealed excitedly when she saw him.

"Wow!" He chuckled, smiling widely. "All this is for me?"

"Yup! Daddy Alex, come sit on the couch!" Zola said, taking his hand.

He went with her to the couch. Amelia took Ellis from Meredith so she could help him. He sat down, and Meredith propped him up with several pillows. Zola climbed up on one side of him, and Bailey was on the other. Meredith hovered nearby, just in case Bailey got a little too excited and tried to jump on Alex.

"Remember guys, be careful. No climbing on Alex." She reminded them gently.

They were excitedly chattering to him, telling him what they bad been doing while he was away, and Alex was thoroughly enjoying it, laughing and asking questions.

Meredith was watching them, enjoying the interaction they were sharing. Amelia walked up and stood next to Meredith. Meredith glanced at her, and saw that although she was smiling, it was clear she had been crying.

"What's wrong?" Meredith asked quietly, her forehead creased in concern.

"Nothing, I'm fine. I'm going to get a water. Alex, do you want a water?" Amelia asked

"Yeah, sure."

Meredith checked to make sure Bailey was still behaving, and followed Amelia into the kitchen.

"Amelia, I can tell you were crying. Just tell me what's wrong."

"Mer, really, I'm fine. I don't want to talk about it right now. Let's just enjoy the day." She passed Ellis back to Meredith before grabbing two bottled waters from the refrigerator and returning to the living room. She opened one of the waters and handed it to Alex.

"Thanks," he said, taking it from her. As he looked up, he caught the concerned expression with which Meredith was watching Amelia, and noticed Amelia was not making eye contact with Meredith. He figured that Meredith must have noticed that Amelia had been crying and was peppering her for details. He needed to act as a buffer.

He turned to the kids. "Hey guys, why don't you pick out a movie we can watch tonight while I get to say hello to your sister."

"Okay! Come on Bailey! Let's go pick out a movie!" Zola said, and raced off with Bailey. Amelia followed them.

Meredith came over and sat next to him. She carefully placed Ellis in his arms, but kept her hands close , unable to anticipate the toddler's actions.

"Hey Ellis. I've missed you!" He made silly faces at her and made her laugh, then turned to Meredith. "Mer, Amelia's okay. Just give her a little space right now."

"You know something. What is it?"

"Seriously, Mer. Just drop it. Please?" He leaned into her. He didn't want Amelia to be made to feel uncomfortable. She nodded in agreement.

The rest of the afternoon was spent watching movies and enjoying being a family. Occasionally, Meredith would sneak a glance at Amelia, but she had kept her promise to not say anything. Amelia seemed happy, and aside from the evidence that she had been crying, all seemed fine.

They had pizza for dinner, and then Amelia and Meredith put the kids to bed. Amelia and Meredith then helped get Alex upstairs safely, despite his protests that he could do it himself.

As Amelia turned to leave, she stopped and turned back to Meredith. "Can I talk to you for a minute?"

Meredith finished settling the pillow behind Alex before walking over to her. "What's up?"

"I know you already know this, but I'm reminding you as a caretaker, not a doctor. He can have the collar off for sleeping, but for um, extracurricular activities, he has to wear the soft collar."

Meredith smiled. "Oh."

There was a pause, then Amelia leaned in and whispered to Meredith, "Mer, whatever you do, don't screw this up. He's one of the good ones." She exited quickly, leaving Meredith shocked.

Once Amelia had left the room, and Meredith regained her composure, Meredith went to Alex. She took his hard neck brace off, then climbed in next to him.

"Okay, I was going to drop it, but now I need to know. What was that about with Amelia earlier?"

He let out a soft sigh. He knew he was going to have to tell her. He looked up at the ceiling. "I went to see Derek today." He let the words hang in the air. She didn't respond, but knew she was listening. "I needed to tell him that you guys were going to be okay. Tell him that I would love you all like he did. I needed to let him know that I wasn't the jerk he knew, that that guy wasn't going to be the one helping to raise his kids." He again fell silent, letting her absorb all he had just said.

"I told him to see if he could pull some strings for Amelia because she really needed a break. That's why she was crying. Because I made her take me, and she heard what I said to him. And then she went and spoke to him, too."

He laid there for a few moments before turning to look at her. She was staring straight ahead and tears streamed from her eyes. This is why he didn't want to tell her. He didn't want her to be sad.

"Mer," he said softly.

She brushed the tears from her face before turning to him. "He would be proud of you," she said. "He would be really, really proud of you." She slid over to him and kissed him, tenderly.


	57. Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Seventeen

 **A/N: Sorry for the delay in updating! My son broke his arm, and has to have surgery. It's been a couple of crazy weeks! Thanks for the favorites, reviews and follows! They make my day, and I'm truly thankful for you all!**

She laid her head on his chest, and he wrapped his arm around her, pulling her close. He kissed the top of her head and breathed her in. It did not escape him how close he had come to never having her next to him again, and he was not taking anything for granted. He never again wanted to be separated from her. So strong was this feeling of love for her, it bordered on being overpowering.

Meredith lie in his arms, amazed at the man he had become. She never imagined that he would go and talk to Derek. He had managed once again to surprise her, and once again she felt her love for him deepen. She was pulled from her reverie by the sound of the door creaking open and a small voice.

"Mom?"

Meredith sat up. "Hey, Zo zo. What's wrong, sweetheart?" she said, soothingly, as she gestured for her to come to the bed.

"I had a bad dream."

"You did? What was it about?" she moved to her side of the bed for Zola to climb between she and Alex.

"I – I don't want to talk about it." Meredith noticed that she didn't take her eyes off of Alex. She caught his gaze, and motioned with her eyes. He immediately understood her meaning.

"Hey, Zo? Did this dream have anything to do with me?"

She looked up at him and nodded, her big brown eyes filling with tears. "Something bad happened, and you went away." She sobbed at the bad memory.

He opened his arm and pulled her in to his side. "Hey, I'm right here, and I'm not going anywhere. I'm okay now. It was just a bad dream."

She did not calm down. Meredith scooted closer to her. "Zo Zo it's okay. He's right here." She glanced at Alex, and saw her concern mirrored on his face. "Hey, do you want to sleep in here tonight?" she asked, brightly.

Zola looked up at Alex. "Can I?"

He smiled at her. "Are you kidding? Of course you can!" He matched Meredith's tone.

Zola nodded and smiled at him. She snuggled into his side. Alex and Meredith exchanged sad, but relieved, glances.

"You know, Zola, I was thinking about the new name you gave me. I love it, and I really love you. And I think, when I can drive again, how about the two of us go out for a special dinner, like a Daddy/Daughter date night? I can buy you a nice, new dress and go to a fancy restaurant. What do you say?"

Zola sat up quickly, a big smile on her face. "Really? Just us?"

Alex chuckled. "Just us."

"Thank you, Daddy Alex!" she hugged him carefully.

Meredith smiled to herself. It seemed that Alex always knew exactly what to do and what to say to make everything better. As different as Alex and Derek had been, in this, they could not be more alike.

After a little while, Zola had fallen asleep. Meredith carefully extracted her from Alex's side and moved her to the middle of the bed.

"After Derek died, she would wake up screaming every night. The whole time I was gone, she woke up every night screaming."

He looked over at her. She was staring up at the ceiling. Her voice had a sad quality to it. His forehead creased with concern.

"Nothing I could say or do would make it better. I would just sit and hold her, rock her in my arms as she screamed. And then Bailey would wake up crying. And it felt like my arms just weren't big enough to comfort them. And it felt like it would never be good or normal or whatever again. Then you came out to San Diego." She turned to look at him. "You took care of them while I was in the hospital. I warned you about the screaming. But it never happened for you. In fact, it never happened again." There was a tone of wonderment in her voice. "You saved her from Malawi, and you just never stopped saving her. You saved all of us."

His breath caught in his throat. "Mer, you've saved _me_. More than you'll ever know.


	58. Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Eighteen

 **A/N: Sorry for the delay. Between work and life craziness, time hasnt been easily found. Thank you for all the reviews and favorites and above all, thanks for sticking with me!**

Amelia couldn't help but laugh when she entered the kitchen. She had been roused from her sleep by the smell of something burning and rushed in to find Meredith covered in waffle batter. It was all over her clothes and she had even managed to get some in her hair. Flour seemed to coat nearly every surface of the kitchen and a stack of darkened waffles stood as tribute to the disastrous cooking attempt.

"Damn it!" Meredith exclaimed as she opened the waffle iron to find yet another scorched waffle.

Amelia laughed harder. "Meredith, what are you doing?"

"I want to make waffles for Alex."

Amelia tried to hold in her laughter, but it was in vain. "Hasn't he been through enough?"

Meredith turned her attention back to the waffles. "Why is this so hard?" she gesticulated to the destroyed kitchen.

Amelia swallowed her giggles when she saw how upset her sister was and went to her side. "Okay, let's see what we've got. Well, first of all, you have it set way too hot. See the dial? You need to lower that." She pointed the dial out to Meredith. When she didn't get a response, she turned to face her.

Meredith stood there and hanged her head, her arms crossed in front of her.

Amelia knitted her eyebrows together. "You okay?"

Meredith blew out a sigh before she raised her eyes to meet Amelia's. "Alex is good at everything. Seriously, Amelia, _everything_." She lifted her eyebrows for emphasis. "And I…can't even make a freaking waffle!" She slumped into a kitchen chair. "What's wrong with me? I'm a surgeon and I can't follow a freaking recipe!" She folded her arms on the table and put her head on them.

Amelia observed her sister. It was no secret that Meredith couldn't cook; in fact, they often made jokes about it. This was definitely about more than her cooking ability. She sat in the chair opposite Meredith.

"What's this really about, Mer?" she asked, gently.

Meredith sighed deeply and looked up at her. "Zola had a nightmare last night. Alex figured out that she was worried about him, that he was going to… go away, and he calmed her down. I couldn't. I couldn't make it better, but he did."

Amelia tilted her head and spoke quietly. "And then there's the fact that he went to see Derek. There's that."

Meredith put her head in her hands and nodded.

"Yeah, that got me pretty bad, too." Amelia said. "I really never expected that. He _is_ so good, Mer. But so are you. You deserve to be happy. It's what Derek would have wanted."

Meredith stood and went to the sink. She splayed her hands on the sides to steady herself, stared ahead at nothing. "It's not that." She paused a moment. "I never told you, but while we were in San Diego, Zola would wake up screaming every night. _Every_ night. And I couldn't make it better. Nothing I did helped. It was…." Her voice trailed off. She took a deep breath and continued. "And then Alex came out. He watched Zola and Bailey while I was in the hospital. I warned him about the screaming. But it didn't happen for him. And it never happened again. But tonight…" her voice trailed off.

Amelia brushed a tear away quickly. Her voice broke when she spoke. "She was afraid she was going to lose him. And she almost did."

Meredith gave a faint nod.

"And maybe you're afraid to lose him too?" Amelia ventured.

Meredith's shoulders slumped and shook slightly. Amelia got up and went to her, rubbing her back in an effort to comfort her.

"Meredith, none of us knows what's going to happen. I'm certainly no expert, but I think that is where faith comes in."

Meredith stood straighter and took a few steadying breaths. She nodded, turned to Amelia and gave her a tight smile.

Amelia returned the smile. She then again noticed the waffle batter all over her and giggled. "Okay, go fix yourself up. I'll clean this up and then I'll show you how to make waffles, okay?"

Meredith chuckled. "Yeah, okay." She turned and left the kitchen.

Amelia surveyed the damage and started to laugh anew.

Meredith went upstairs to her room. It was early, a quarter til six, and still dark outside. She hadn't slept at all, but she was so used to not sleeping that it hardly ever phased her now. Checking on Alex and Zola, she found them both still sleeping peacefully. Bailey and Ellis liked their sleep, so they wouldn't be awake for at least another hour.

She went into the bathroom and checked herself in the mirror, grimaced at the mess. She went to the shower and turned it on. She leaned against the wall while waiting for it to warm up, and thought about what Amelia had said about faith. She slid down the wall to the floor and pulled her knees to her chest, hugging them tightly to her.

"Amelia's right," she began. "I'm so afraid to lose him. The kids have been through so much, and they're happy now. Please don't take him from us. Please let Zola's nightmares stop. Please." She buried her head in her arms and wept quietly. After a couple of minutes, she stopped and took a couple of steadying breaths. She stood, undressed, and got into the shower.

A few minutes later, she rejoined Amelia in the kitchen, which showed no signs of the tragic cooking attempt from earlier. "Okay, let's make some waffles!" Meredith said, trying to sound more cheery than she felt at the moment.

Amelia saw the redness in her eyes and knew she had been crying. Not knowing how else to help her, Amelia went over and started helping her with the waffles.

Over the next hour, Amelia worked with Meredith, teaching her how to check the temperature of the waffle maker, measure ingredients and most importantly, not wear more batter than she used in the waffles. When all was said and done, there was a stack of waffles that, although not the most beautiful looking, were definitely edible.

"Morning, Mom. Morning Aunt Amy." Zola entered the kitchen and went to hug her mom.

"Morning, Zo. Did you sleep okay?"

She nodded. "Thanks for letting me sleep in your room."

"You're welcome, sweetie. Hey, I made waffles! Do you want some?"

Zola's eyes went wide with alarm, but Amelia stood in back of Meredith, motioning to Zola that she had helped her, and it was ok. Zola relaxed and smiled. "Yeah! I do!"

Meredith turned to look at Amelia, who had quickly looked away, getting waffles for Zola.

"Mom, Daddy Alex is awake." Zola said, taking a bite of waffle.

"Oh, okay. Thanks, Zo. Amelia, I'm going to - " Meredith started, but Amelia interrupted her.

"Go. I got this." She made a small waving motion at Meredith.

Meredith quickly left the kitchen and hurried up the stairs to him. She entered the bedroom to find him sitting up in bed.

"Good morning!" She went to him and kissed him. She grabbed a pillow and added it to the one already behind him to give him some more support. "Did you sleep okay?"

"Yeah, I slept great." As he watched her, his eyebrows pinched together. She was talking a little too fast, her voice higher than normal, and she was avoiding eye contact. These were her classic tells when something was wrong.

"Do you need me to help with the brace?" She reached to grab it, but he gently grabbed her hand and stopped her, pulling her down to sit with him.

"Meredith, what's wrong?" He took her hands in his.

She smiled at him. "Nothing's wrong. Everything's great! Now let's go downstairs because I have a surprise for you!" She went to stand up, but he held onto her arm.

"Mer, I know something's wrong. Talk to me." His forehead creased in worry.

She sighed and settled next to him on the bed, looking down at her hands as she spoke. "I – I can't lose you, okay? And it terrifies me!" she stammered . Despite her efforts, a tear trickled down her cheek, which she quickly wiped away. "I was afraid I was going to lose you after your accident," she continued, "but last night with Zola, it just made it all the more obvious how important you are to me – to us." She looked up into his eyes. "I need you. _We_ need you."

He reached out and brushed a tear from her cheek with his thumb. "I'm terrified, too, Mer. But I'm not going anywhere. I need you too." He smiled his trademark smile. "We're just going to have to be terrified together."

She inhaled and exhaled deeply, then smiled and gave him a small laugh. "Okay! Terrified together it is!" she exclaimed brightly, earning a laugh from Alex. "I really do have a surprise for you, though. You ready to go downstairs?"

"Not quite." He pulled her to him and pressed his lips to hers. He felt her mouth open to him, and he let his tongue slip inside, delighting in being reacquainted with her sweetness. Their tongues swirled together joyously, thoroughly enjoying their reunion.

After a couple of minutes, Meredith reluctantly broke from the kiss, and pressed her forehead to his.

"We really should go downstairs." She said, quietly.

"I think we should stay right where we are," he countered, pulling his face back from hers, then leaning in to nibble her ear.

A small moan escaped her and she was momentarily powerless. She regained her senses and chuckled. "You're not playing fair!" she teased him, withdrawing from his ministrations. "But if we go downstairs, I may be able to convince Amelia to take the kids out for a few hours."

"That sounds like a great idea." He agreed, and allowed her to help him put on the cumbersome collar.

They entered the kitchen a few minutes later, and Meredith helped him get settled in his chair.

"Daddy Alex, Mom made waffles! And they're good!" said Zola, proudly, with much surprise in her voice.

"She did?" he said to Zola, then turned to face Meredith. "You made waffles?" he asked, incredulously.

"Yes! Amelia taught me." She took the plate Amelia handed her and placed it in front of Alex. She chewed on her lower lip while she watched him take a bite.

He smiled, and looked up at her. "They're really good!"

"I told you so!" Zola sang, as she took her plate to the sink before leaving the kitchen.

Meredith smiled widely. "Really?"

"Really! I love them! When did you learn how?"

"This morning. I wanted to surprise you. It's a good thing Amelia came in when she did. I may have burned down the kitchen otherwise!"

Amelia laughed as she joined them at the table, setting a plate down for Meredith and one for herself. "You were a good student, Mer. Once I taught you not to actually wear the batter.

The two of them giggled, earning a raised eyebrow from Alex. Amelia leaned over to him and whispered, "I'll tell you all about it later. It was hilarious!"

Meredith feigned being hurt. "Hey! I heard that!" After the laughter died down, Meredith turned to Amelia. "Amelia, after everything you did for me this morning, I hate to even ask this…"

Amelia cut her off. "You know, I was thinking of taking the kids out for a few hours today, if that's okay with you, Mer? I haven't had much time with them lately." She knew what Meredith was going to ask, and wanted to take the burden off of her.

Meredith smiled gratefully. "That would be fine. Thank you."

"No, thank you! After breakfast, I'll go get the little ones ready and fed and we will be off!"

Alex and Meredith exchanged glances, and Alex waggled his eyebrows at her.


	59. Part Two, Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Nineteen

 **A/N: Okay, this has taken so long because I've honestly been in a funk due to the season finale, and the episodes leading up to it. This has been a little hard to write.**

 **Thank you for your patience, and your kind reviews! Hopefully I won't be so stuck in future chapters! I've been working and re-working this one for so long, that I finally decided just to go with it. I hope you like it, and please review!**

After breakfast, Meredith worked with Amelia getting the kids ready to go out for the day.

"Amelia, I don't know how to thank you…"

Amelia cut her off. "Really, Mer, no thanks necessary. I want to help, and I love spending time with the kids. You two need some time alone." She paused for a moment before continuing. "You need to talk to him, Meredith. You shouldn't take this all on yourself. He can help you, let him."

Meredith smiled gratefully and put her hand on Amelia's arm. "I know." She chuckled. "I can't believe that you used to drive me crazy. Now, I don't know what I'd do without you."

Amelia pulled her in for a quick hug. "Okay, enough of that, cuz you're gonna make me cry."

They both laughed lightly. "Sorry! I don't know what's wrong with me. Ever since Alex was injured, I just get so emotional!" Mer said.

"It's understandable. You have been through a lot and you're not sleeping very well. You have to start taking care of yourself, Mer. You need to get some rest. I'm here. Let me help you. Don't try to do everything on your own."

Meredith nodded. "Okay. Thanks, Amelia." She gave her a tight smile and finished getting the kids ready.

After seeing them off, Meredith joined Alex, who had gone upstairs after breakfast, in the bedroom. He was sitting up in the bed, wearing a fresh t-shirt and sweat pants.

"Kids are gone. How was your shower?" She asked, crossing over and climbing onto the bed with him.

He sighed contentedly. "I didn't know I could enjoy a shower so much that didn't have you in it!" he mused.

She chuckled. "There are few pleasures in life greater than the post hospitalization shower!"

He smirked. "I can think of a few things we'd enjoy more."

She snuggled up to him and he leaned in to kiss her softly.

"So, Amelia told me you had a bit of a rough morning. What's really going on, Mer?" His tone was gentle and his brow was creased in concern.

She hesitated. Telling him everything on her mind, despite their lengthy relationship, was still a foreign concept and one that made her uncomfortable at best. She knew this was irrational and that she needed to free herself of the burden she was feeling. She sat up and faced him, swallowed hard and began. "It's…it's like I told you earlier. I am terrified to lose you, but it's more than that."

She paused, and he nodded at her to go on, taking her hands in his for support. "With Derek, I knew I could live without him. I'd done it before. I never wanted to have to, but I knew I could. But with you...you've been with me since the beginning of intern year, and we've always had each other. It was you who got me and the kids past losing Derek. I never would have survived that without you. And it dawned on me…I don't know how to survive in a world without you in it, and I almost had to…we all almost had to." Despite her best efforts, fresh tears sprang to her eyes.

There was silence for a minute. Suddenly, the silence was broken by Alex's laughing. It started softly, but quickly grew to full strength. Meredith pulled her hands back defensively, wiped at her face and looked at him, annoyed.

"Are you kidding me right now? Laughing at me?"

This increased his laughter. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" He said through his laughter. After a few moments, he settled down. "I'm not laughing at you, Mer. I'm not! It's just…funny." He started chuckling again, but stopped when she glared at him. "Think about it. I was evil spawn. And now... you can't…live without...me." He lost his fight for control and sputtered the words in between fits of laughter.

Meredith watched him for a few seconds, and then started to chuckle too. Within seconds, their laughter rang throughout the house, and continued for several minutes.

Slowly, the laughter petered out. "Come here," he said gently, pulling her into his arms. "Meredith, you're the strongest person I've ever known. You don't give yourself enough credit. You could totally live without me." She started to protest, but he continued. "Not that you're going to have to, but you could. You can do anything, Mer."

She sniffled and looked up at him. "You really believe that, don't you?"

He brushed a strand of wayward hair from her cheek. "I've believed that for a very long time. You're amazing, Mer."

She smiled a full smile at him. "You know, I think you're amazing, too." She closed the distance between them and straddled his waist. She gazed into his deep chocolatey eyes and saw her love for him reflected back to her.

He lovingly stroked her tear stained cheek with his thumb and shook his head almost imperceptibly. "Mer." Saying her name could mean many things. This time, it was an expression of his immense love for her.

He allowed his hand to slide behind her head to the nape of her neck, and pulled her in for a kiss. His lips barely brushed hers before he pressed his forehead to hers, content just to breathe her in, delighting in the scent of her lavender shampoo , still lingering from her morning shower.

His hand demanded access to further sensation and moved up from her neck to wind in her hair as he engulfed her mouth with his own. As their tongues danced together, he tasted the salty tang of her tears and silently vowed to do anything to make her happy, to keep the tears from falling.

Desperately needing to comfort her, he yearned to feel her silky skin, to soothe her with his touch. While his one hand continued it's sensual gripping of her hair, his other hand slid under her shirt and slowly made its ascent up her back. Slowly, as their passion increased, his hand slid around to her front and moved upwards, sliding under the lacy fabric covering her mounded flesh, eliciting a small moan from her.

She sat up and reached to remove her top, but he grabbed her hands to stop her.

"No, let me do it. It's good therapy." He smiled his charming half smile at her while waggling his eyebrows. She chuckled, but acquiesced, and raised her arms while he slid the garment over her head. He grasped her raised hands and held her arms up while kissing her hard on the mouth. He deepened the kiss, and his hands slid ever so slowly down her raised arms.

The heat from his hands as they made their erotic descent sent shivers up her spine and she mewled her approval against his lips. She felt herself melting into him, the terror of the last week forgotten, needing urgently to be as close to him as was possible. She shifted slightly to allow her sensitive area to rub against him in an effort to quell the rising ache inside her.

Now it was his turn to moan his approval, as his hands reached the area just under her arms and continued to slide down her side to her waist. He broke from the kiss and shifted his legs slightly while staring lustfully into her aquamarine eyes. He wrapped an arm firmly around her slight midsection and used the other arm for leverage against the bed. He plunged his lips back onto hers as he effortlessly flipped her onto her back, positioning himself between her legs. He reached down to unbutton her jeans, but her hands covered his as she broke from the kiss.

"The collar, Alex." She said, breathlessly.

"I'm fine, I don't need it."

She pursed her lips and raised an eyebrow. This was non negotiable. With a deep sigh, he reached over to the night stand and grabbed the offending device.

She chuckled at the scowl that had formed on his face. "Don't be grumpy. I'm going to show you how much I appreciate you putting it on."

The scowl disappeared, and he grinned at her, going back to work on removing her jeans. She noted with great pleasure that his injury did not seem to affect his abilities in this area whatsoever.

They spent the next couple of hours in joyful rediscovery of each other, expending all of their energy on the other until they could exert only blissfully satisfied smiles. A shared shower was found to be infinitely more pleasurable than the one he had so enjoyed earlier, and afterwards they lie together in the bed, once again fully clothed, with her nestled in his arms. He draped one of his arms across her abdomen, lacing his fingers through hers. He again thought about how close they had come to losing each other. He thought about how much he had put her through, and his heart constricted, saddened by the burden she had been feeling. "We should take a vacation," he prompted.

She turned her head to look up at him. "What? Where did that come from?" she asked.

"We never take vacation time," he began. "Life is too short to work all the time. And the best reason," he added, rubbing her leg playfully with his foot, "is that we would have so much more time for this."

She laughed. "Okay, I'm sold. Where do you want to go?"

"I'm just the idea man. Where is up to you." He said, kissing the top of her head.

"Well, I've always wanted to go to Hawaii," she said.

He clucked his tongue. "Ooh, you in a bikini…I like it!" he said, evoking a chuckle from her.

"When do you want to go?" she asked, still curious at his sudden interest in a vacation.

"Well, I still have a couple of weeks of rehab left, so how about we plan it after I'm discharged," he said, as he lazily stroked her arm.

"That sounds good to me," she said, glancing at the clock. "Amelia should be back with the kids soon."

"Then I have to go pick out a game for tonight," he said, chuckling at the confused look he received from Meredith. "I have to find something Zola can't beat me at!" he explained.

Meredith laughed. "Well, good luck with that. She has an uncanny ability to win at games. I haven't beaten her in months!" She sat up. "Come on, let's go downstairs." She helped him up, putting the collar back on him, much to his chagrin.


	60. Part Two, Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty

 **A/N: I truly enjoyed writing this chapter. I have always loved how Alex is with Mer's kids, especially Zola. I hope you love it, and please review!;)**

A few weeks had passed, filled with Alex's therapy by day and wonderful family time by night. Things were finally settling back to a normal routine, and happiness was firmly in their grasp. Meredith had returned to work, Alex had been discharged from therapy and tonight was Alex's long awaited daddy/daughter date night with Zola. They had gone and bought a dress a few days before, with Meredith's help, as Alex still had not been cleared to drive at the time and he did not want to postpone any longer.

Alex stood in front of the mirror working and re-working his tie, the knot just not coming out the way he wanted. He had just untied it for perhaps the fourth time when Meredith entered the room.

"Zola is almost ready to go," she said, as she walked over and sat on the edge of the bed, facing Alex. "Maggie is helping her with her hair. She is so excited!" She noticed that Alex didn't seem to be paying any attention to her, and he didn't seem to have heard what she had said. He removed the tie yet again, with a bit of a sigh, to re-start the attempt.

She watched him silently with great curiosity. His mouth was set in a tight line, his shoulders up by his ears. After a moment, the corners of her mouth turned up in a smile. She stood and went to him, stepped in front and gently took the tie from him. She reached around his neck and went to work tying it.

"Did I ever tell you about Zola's first night home after we had gotten her back?" she asked, as she continued to work on the tie.

"No, I don't think so." He said, although she noticed he was still looking past her at the mirror.

She chuckled. "Derek was _so_ nervous! Everything had to be absolutely perfect for her. He fussed over her all day, didn't leave her alone for a moment. And then we went to put her to bed. She was very tired, and fell asleep as soon as we lay her down in the crib." She smiled wistfully at the memory as she finished tying the tie and adjusted his collar. Her hands, now free of their task, rested softly on his upper arms. "Well, the mattress pad had bunched up a little, and it had raised up just a bit. Derek was worried it was going to be uncomfortable for her and wanted to fix it. I tried to get him to leave it alone, but it wasn't perfect, and it _had_ to be perfect! He said it would just take a second. And he was right, it took just a second to wake up a sleeping, overly tired baby. She cried for two hours!" she said on a laugh, seeing that Alex was now looking at her, smiling. She leaned into him and put her palm to his chest and looked deeply into his hazel eyes as she spoke softly. "She doesn't care if the mattress pad is bunched up. She doesn't care if your tie is a little off, she just wants you." She encircled his neck with her arms, and raised herself up on tiptoe to give him a quick kiss.

He pressed his forehead to hers and breathed her in. His shoulders lowered and his breathing slowed. "Thanks, Mer."

"No, Alex. Thank _you_ for doing this for her. It means so much to her, and it means the world to me." She again gave him a quick kiss before letting him go.

Maggie popped her head in. "Hey guys, Miss Zola is ready. She wants to make an entrance, though, so go downstairs and wait." A small, excited squeak escaped her as she turned to leave.

"You ready?" Meredith asked, chuckling at Maggie's exuberance.

"Uh, yeah." Alex answered as he grabbed his coat jacket, discreetly checking the pocket as he did so. There was a lot riding on this night.

Once downstairs, Meredith joined Amelia, who sat on the couch, while Meredith was perched on it's arm. Both had their cameras ready.

Alex stood near the staircase, still fidgeting with his tie. Meredith silently nudged Amelia and nodded to Alex. The two women exchanged lighthearted smiles watching him fuss.

Suddenly, Maggie hurried down the stairs. "Ready?" she asked the others, who acknowledged her with nods. "Ladies and gentleman, I present Miss Zola Grey-Shepherd!" she called up the stairs.

Zola came down the stairs quickly at first, slowed by a quick hand motion from Maggie, who was clearly enjoying the pageantry. When she reached the bottom, she was met with a chorus of "awws" from the women. Zola stood in front of Alex and, with a nod from Maggie, curtsied. Alex beamed as he replied with a bow.

"Okay, you two, I need to get some pictures," Meredith said, wiping a tear at the sweet scene.

Alex and Zola went through several poses, which, with the three ladies taking photos, took several minutes. Finally, Alex had to interject. "If we are going to make our reservation, we have to get going."

Meredith gave Zola a hug and kissed the top of her head. "Have a great time!" she said, before turning to Alex. She gave him a quick kiss before whispering in his ear, "remember, she just needs you," and squeezed his arm. He nodded slightly, smiling at her as he again visibly relaxed.

"Are you ready for our date, Miss Grey-Shepherd?" He asked, extending his arm to her.

"Yes I am!" she exclaimed as she took his arm.

He turned to Meredith as they were leaving. " Don't worry, I'll have her home at a decent hour," he quipped, getting a laugh from all three ladies.

Alex opened the door to the backseat for Zola, who climbed in and fastened her seat belt as Alex got in the driver's seat.

"Daddy Alex, I put the address for the restaurant in your GPS," Zola said from the backseat, earning a chuckle from Alex.

"How did you even find this place, Zo?"

"I searched Google. It had good Yelp reviews," she said.

"You are a very smart young lady, you know that?" he said, smiling proudly at her in the rear view mirror.

As they walked up to the restaurant a short time later, Zola motioned to him that she wanted to whisper something to him, and he bent down to her. "Sometimes if you give them money, they will give you a better table," she whispered.

Alex grinned widely. "You are so much like your mom!" he said, chuckling.

Once inside, they did, indeed, get a very nice table with a beautiful view of the city after Alex had slipped some money to the host. Zola smiled widely in approval.

Alex made certain to pull her chair out for her and place her napkin on her lap. She needed to be shown exactly how she should be treated, so she would never settle for less. They talked and laughed throughout the dinner, during which Alex asked her all about herself, again demonstrating what a proper date should look like.

They had finished their meal and were waiting for the dessert they had ordered when Alex decided now was the time to talk to her. He nervously cleared his throat before speaking.

"Zola, I want to tell you again that I love that you call me Daddy Alex. The first time I saw your card," he paused to clear his throat, "I think I read it about ten times before it sunk in what it said. It means so much to me, that I don't think I can even put it into words. I know that I'm not your dad, and I know how much you miss him. I want to make a promise to you. I will always be here for you to help you, for anything that you need, but most importantly, I will _always_ love you. I know how much your dad loved you, and I know how much he would have wanted to be with you." He reached in to his pocket, and pulled out a small box. "That's why I got you this." He handed her the box.

"What is it?" she asked, her voice shaking slightly.

"Open it!" he said, happily.

With lightly trembling fingers, she opened the box to reveal a beautiful, heart shaped locket. "Oh that's so pretty," she said, almost on a whisper.

"It opens up," he instructed her.

She struggled for a minute, but was able to open the locket. A broad smile spread on her face. "It's Daddy and me!" she said, excitedly.

"Yeah, Zo." He said, quietly. "So he can always be with you, too. I never want you to feel like I'm trying to take his place. He's your dad. I'm just filling in where he can't be."

She pushed her chair back, and carrying the locket ran over to him, throwing her arms around his neck. "I love you, Daddy Alex." He hugged her, closing his eyes tightly to keep the tears from falling.

"I love you so much Zola." When she let go, he asked, "do you want me to put that on you?"

She nodded happily, and he put it on her, her hand immediately going to the locket, holding it.

Their dessert had arrived and Zola returned happily to her seat. Alex watched her, smiling, as she picked up her spoon to eat her ice cream. She had the spoon halfway to her mouth when she suddenly put it back in the ice cream. She jumped up and ran back to Alex, who leaned forward to her. "Zo, what's wrong?" he asked, concerned.

She threw her arms around his neck and squeezed him tight. "Thank you, Daddy Alex," she whispered.

"You're welcome, Zola," he said quietly. "You're so welcome."


	61. Chapter Twenty one

Chapter Twenty-one

 **A/N: Welcome to Kris's Wheel of Excuses! What has happened to her this time to leave us hanging? Well, let's spin the wheel and find out! RATATATATATATATATATATATATAT-TAT-TAT-TAT**

 **Well, Bob, we have landed on "she can't come up with a good excuse, so she just begs your forgiveness! Oh. And she promises to not do it again…or at least have a better excuse!"**

 **A special shout-out to Longclaw 1-6 for your AMAZING reviews and keeping me motivated! I definitely took some of your suggestions. THANK YOU AGAIN!!!!!**

 **And now, on with the show!**

It was a little past nine when the door opened and Alex entered, carrying a sleeping Zola. Meredith, sitting on the couch reading a journal article, jumped up and went to them. She giggled when she saw Zola, knowing how the motion of car made her fall asleep.

"She didn't even make it halfway home." Alex greeted her, smiling as he leaned down to give Meredith a quick kiss. "I'm going to take her upstairs."

"I'll come with you," she said, as they ascended the stairs. When they reached the top, she stated, "Here, let me take her. You can go get changed."

"Yeah, okay. Thanks." He answered, handing the bundle in his arms to Meredith. He then stepped into their room.

Meredith carried Zola down the hall to her room and laid her gently on the bed. She turned to get pajamas from her drawer, and as she turned back, she noticed the gold locket nestled atop the pleats of her emerald green dress. Oh Alex, you bought her a gift. Is this why you were so nervous tonight? Meredith wondered.

Carefully, so as not to wake Zola, Meredith reached behind her neck to unclasp the necklace. Holding the small gold heart in her hand, she admired the detail etched upon it, noticing a moment later it was a locket. Gingerly, she opened it, revealing the picture of Zola with Derek. She sucked in air as tears sprang instantly to her eyes. She slowly sank down to the edge of the bed and lowered her hands to her lap, sitting in total stillness as she stared straight ahead, tears spilling down her cheeks.

"Meredith?" Amelia's concerned voice carried softly in to the room from the doorway.

"I'm okay," she answered quietly, holding the locket out for Amelia.

Amelia slowly entered the room and crossed cautiously to Meredith. Her eyes went to the locket, and back to Meredith, who was looking ahead, but not looking at her. Feeling panicked, but maintaining control, she reached out and took the locket from Meredith. She looked down, and, like Meredith had before her, admired the small locket. She opened it, unable to stifle the gasp that escaped her lips. Her tears were also instantaneous. "Damn you Alex for making me cry again!" she whispered, staring at the picture.

"Yeah," Meredith whispered back.

Maggie appeared in the doorway and was immediately on guard at their appearance. "Oh my gosh, what's wrong?" she said softly.

Amelia held the locket out to her. "We're fine."

Maggie looked at them quizzically before crossing over and taking the locket from Amelia. She looked from Meredith to Amelia who were both now staring straight ahead, lost in thought. She repeated the process as both women had done before her. Her sharp intake of breath was followed with a quiet, "Oh."

"Meredith, what does this mean?" Maggie asked.

Meredith sniffled and wiped her eyes. "If I had to guess, it was Alex's way of making sure Zola knows he's not trying to replace Derek." She let out a small sigh. "If you only knew Alex when I first met him…" she paused, struggling to find the words. "He didn't have it easy, not by far. His father was abusive, his mother is a schizophrenic and was not fit to be a parent. Alex was often Mother and Father to his brother and sister, but nobody was there for him. It's why it's so important to him to make sure Zola knows he's not trying to replace her dad."

The trio sat in silence for several minutes, each lost in their own thoughts, when Meredith chuckled lightly. "Oh, if George could see him now!"

"Who's George?" Amelia asked.

"O'Malley," offered Maggie.

Amelia turned to her. "You knew him?"

Maggie shook her head. "No, but I've heard stories."

"George and Alex never got along. Alex never thought he measured up to George, and his insecurity prevented them from ever being friends." Meredith explained. "I wonder what he'd think of Alex now," she mused.

Amelia reached out and put her hand on Meredith's arm. "He's a good man, Mer," she said softly.

Meredith turned to her, her smile reaching her eyes. "Yeah, he really is." She turned and looked at her sleeping daughter. "Come on, help me get her ready for bed."

Working together, the three ladies quickly accomplished their task. After pausing in the doorway for a moment, they said their goodnights and went to their respective rooms.

As Meredith entered the bedroom, she caught the end of a whispered conversation Alex was having.

"So we're all set for tomorrow, then?" He spoke in hushed tones, his back turned to the doorway. "Yeah, I'll let you know. Thanks, thank you." He ended the call.

"Who was that?" Meredith asked, crossing over to him.

He appeared to jump slightly as he turned to her. "Oh, uh, Arizona. She needs me to do a consult for her tomorrow, and I was just making sure it was all set."

She sensed there was more to it, but decided that he would tell her when he was ready. She walked over to him and put her arms around his neck and he looked down at her. Upon noticing her tear stained cheeks, his brow furrowed.

"Hey, you've been crying. What's wrong?" he stroked her cheek with his thumb.

She smiled up at him. "Nothing's wrong. I…I saw the locket. Actually, we saw the locket. Amelia and Maggie were there, too. If you're planning on keeping this up, you should really purchase stock in the tissue company! I think the three of us just went through a whole box!"

He gave her a sheepish grin and blushed slightly. "Oh. I just wanted to let her know that…that I'm not trying to replace her dad, and wanted her to know that he would always be with her."

Ever so slightly, she tightened her grip on his neck. "Alex, it's beautiful, and very thoughtful. I've told you before, you are not your father." Her eyes searched his, hoping to convey her seriousness. She needed him to know that he was good enough, more than good enough.

His hands gripped her upper arms gently, a serious expression upon his face. "I know, Mer." He let out a sigh. "She's such a great kid. I just want her to know how much I love her."

She removed one hand from behind his neck and placed it softly on his cheek. "Oh, Alex. She knows how much you love her. And she loves you. It's like I told you earlier, she just needs you."

"Yeah," he replied quietly He leaned down to give her a chaste kiss on the lips before pulling her into a hug, resting his cheek atop her head.

"So, how did it go tonight?" she asked, pulling back from him to stare up into his eyes.

He gazed down at her and was again struck by her immense love for him that he saw reflected in her eyes. "I think I'll let Zola tell you all about it. Tonight, I think we can make our own memories."

"I like the sound of that," she said, as he bent to capture her mouth with his own.

A few hours later, Alex watched Meredith's sleeping form, listening to the gentle sounds of her breathing. It was a moment he wished he could remember forever as he drank in her beauty. He let out a contented sigh and rolled over to try to get some sleep. Tomorrow was a big day, after all.

After the usual morning rush to get everyone out the door, Alex was finally at work. He paced in a near frantic pace, looking up and down the hallway. After several minutes of this, he spotted Arizona coming down the hallway and rushed to her.

"Where have you been? I've been waiting for twenty minutes!" he greeted her gruffly.

In one quick move, Arizona stepped in front of him, turning to face him and stuck her finger in his chest. "No, no, no, no. You don't get to take that tone with me. I am doing you a favor. A pretty big one, I might add!" Her look of admonishment morphed into a smile, and she retracted her finger once she saw the repentant look on his face, along with a mumbled, "Sorry."

"Okay, now you're all set up in 2310. If you need anything, let me know." She turned to leave, but spun suddenly and again poked him with her finger. "But let me know nicely!"

He nodded. "I was an ass. I'm sorry."

Arizona glared at him for only another second before giving him her best Arizona smile. "You're forgiven. Now go!"

He returned the smile before he turned and hurried off.

Maggie was hurrying down the hall when Amelia entered off another hallway and turned in the same direction in which Maggie was heading.

"Hey!" Maggie greeted her warmly.

"Hey yourself. Alex called me for a consult…you too?" she asked, noting Maggie was going the same way, and on the Peds floor.

Maggie looked at her, sadness in her eyes. "Poor kid needs cardio and neuro? That doesn't sound good."

"Yeah. I hope it's something we can fix. I really hate losing kids." Amelia echoed her sadness.

They rounded the corner to find Alex standing alone outside of a closed door, craning his neck to look in the opposite direction. He turned towards them as they approached and gestured for them to hurry.

"Did anyone see you?" he asked.

Maggie and Amelia looked at each other and exchanged confused glances before turning back to Alex.

"No, I didn't see anyone on my way. Did you, Mags?" Amelia asked, watching Alex, who seemed to be looking for someone. He looked up the hallway in one direction, then the other, and repeated the process several times.

"No, I didn't see anyone either." Maggie answered, also noting Alex's odd behavior.

Finally, Alex turned to them. "Okay, be very quiet," he said mysteriously as he opened the door. Amelia entered first, giving Alex a once over with her eyes as she walked passed him, looking for a clue to his unusual demeanor.

Amelia and Maggie entered a darkened room that had the blinds drawn. They could make out a shadowy figure sitting on the other side of the room.

Alex entered, closing the door behind him. He cleared his throat nervously before speaking. "Thank you both for coming. I need your help with something, but it needs to stay secret."

Amelia crossed her arms. "What did you do?" she asked, a mix of accusation and amusement in her voice.

"Nothing, alright?" he sounded a little impatient, so he cleared his throat to try again. "Sorry. No, this isn't my area of uh, expertise, and I was hoping you could help." He crossed over to the shadowy figure. "Don't scream," he said sternly as he turned on a small lamp on the table.

"Well I'll be damned," Amelia said quietly, a smile quickly filling her face.

Tears sprang to Maggie's eyes instantly. "Oh my God, Alex!" she exclaimed, quietly.

Alex smiled sheepishly at them. "This is Mr. Sanderson," he began. Arizona and I treated his granddaughter last year, and he said if I ever needed any help, to let him know. He's here today so you two can help me pick out an engagement ring for Meredith." He gestured towards the rings laid out on black velvet before them.

Amelia and Maggie exchanged greetings with Mr. Sanderson, and then both went to Alex, throwing their arms around him, tears streaking down their faces.

"Okay, let's not get ahead of ourselves. There's still work to do," he said.


	62. Part Two, Chapter Twenty-two

Chapter Twenty Two

 **A/N: Thanks everyone for your patience! I'm doing my best to update, it's just slow going. We will get there, I promise! A MASSIVE thank you to Longclaw 1-6 for your input and support! I seriously couldn't have got through this chapter without you. Your ideas were brilliant!**

A few hours later, he had way too much knowledge of princess cuts versus emerald cuts and oval cuts versus round cuts and a stunning, two carat, round brilliant cut ring with a diamond encrusted band. Chosen, he said, because it reminded him of how her eyes sparkled when she looked at him. This set off another round of 'aww' by the sisters, and another big hug as they approved of his decision.

"So, how are you going to propose?" Amelia asked.

Alex looked briefly at his phone. "Uh, I'm still working on it." He answered somewhat distractedly. Looking back up at the sisters, he continued, "Remember, you cannot say or do anything to make Meredith suspicious!" He looked pointedly at Maggie with this statement.

Maggie looked affronted. "Why are you looking at me?"

Amelia scoffed. "Mags, you're the weak link here."

Maggie's mouth opened in surprise. "I can keep a secret!" Alex snorted, and Maggie glared at him.

"Don't look at him like that!" Amelia admonished her. "You're like a freaking Disney princess! You get all doe-eyed around love."

Maggie did her best to look annoyed, but she knew there was some truth to it. "I do not!"

Amelia had her hand on her hip, and dramatically tipped her head towards her. She took the ring box from Alex and opened it, thrusting it in Maggie's direction. Immediately, her eyes went wide and a huge grin spread across her face.

Amelia shared a look with Alex as she handed the ring back to him, then turned back to Maggie. "Put some fins on you, and you're the Little Mermaid!"

Maggie turned to Alex with a contrite smile. "I'll stay in the lab."

The three laughed heartily. "Come on, Ariel!" Amelia said, wrapping an arm around her, as they left.

Alex picked up the phone, searched his contacts and dialed. The call was answered on the second ring. "Hey, are you busy? I need a favor…"

Ten minutes later found Alex once again pacing a hallway and looking for someone. His anxiety was relieved when he saw her coming down the ramp.

"Hi!" She greeted him in her usual, overly cheerful manner. He fought his natural impulse to make a snide remark.

"Thanks for meeting me, April."

"Sure!" She smiled and rocked back on her heels, her hands in her pockets.

Alex struggled with what to say, and a rather lengthy moment of silence stretched in front of them.

April looked around, and finally looked back at Alex. "So…. Are you going to tell me about this favor?"

Alex let out an uncomfortable sigh and motioned to the gurney lining the wall. April sat, and he sat next to her.

Struggling with his discomfiture, he began his speech. "Look, when I had my accident… you showed up, okay? And not just for me, you showed up for Meredith. You gave her something no one else could. You helped her, and by extension you helped me. I know I haven't always treated you fairly, and I want to say… I want to say I'm sorry, okay? You're a good person, and no matter how crappy I've treated you…which, just so you know, I know how crappy I've treated you, you've always been a friend to me, even when I didn't deserve it. Hell, especially when I didn't deserve it! So…I guess I'm saying…thanks." He wasn't able to look at her, afraid of what he'd see when he did.

Another protracted silence followed. He heard her exhale loudly, and then felt her hand on his own. "Alex, thank you. That means a lot to me."

He ventured to look up at her, and was relieved to see her smiling softly at him. "Well, I meant it," he responded, returning the smile, placing his free hand atop hers.

"So, what is this favor you needed, and why did you want to meet down here in the tunnels?"

He stood and began to pace, although much more slowly this time. "Well, this place holds a lot of meaning for me. It's where we would hang out when we were interns, it's where we spent a lot of time getting to know each other, and it's where Meredith first started accepting me, which has led to everything else. It's why, when I propose to her, I would like to do it here." Alex waited for April's reaction, which came almost immediately.

"Oh my gosh! That's wonderful!" Tears sprang to her eyes as she remembered all too vividly that horrible day when she thought he may be paralyzed. She closed her eyes, clasped her hands and turned her head heavenward. "Thank you," she whispered.

Alex didn't usually put stock in prayer, but he had witnessed it help Meredith and had been healed rather quickly from something that could have killed him. The fact that the healing came almost immediately after she had prayed over him was something that he had wrestled with quietly over the past few weeks. Now, as she prayed that brief prayer of thanks, he felt a warmth come over him. He wanted to find a way to rationalize it as some biological response to a situation, but he could not bring himself to do so. And the strangest part about that, for him, was that he was okay with it. A slow grin spread across his face as she opened her eyes and saw him staring at her. She tilted her head as if ready to say something, but thought better of it.

"So, what do you say? Can you help me transform this hallway into a romantic engagement destination?"

"I'd be honored!" she answered sincerely. "When do you plan to do it?"

"In about three hours?"

She looked around, making mental notes about what could work. "Yeah, I can make it happen."

He handed her an envelope, which contained a large amount of cash, then narrowed his eyes at her. He wanted to understand why he felt the warmth he did when she said her prayer of thanks. He saw her usual trusting expression, mixed with excitement about her mission, and before he could stop himself, he pulled her in to a hug. "Thanks, Apes." He turned and left before she could admonish him not to call her that.

She watched his retreating form until he was no longer visible, and then once again turned her gaze heavenward. "You really do work in mysterious ways, don't ya?"


	63. Chapter 63

Meredith sighed as she entered the restroom. She was exhausted already and about to operate on a young girl, the victim of a motor vehicle accident. Jackson and Arizona had already gone to scrub in, while she had updated the family. She stood at the sink and stared at her reflection, surprised at the depth of the dark circles under her eyes and the anemic quality to her skin. She made a mental note to have her iron levels checked; it would definitely explain the severe fatigue she felt.

She washed and dried her face and took several deep breaths, blowing them out hard each time. Steeling herself, she lightly slapped her cheeks and shrugged her shoulders. She was going to have to push through. Resigned, she exited the restroom and headed off to the OR.

Jackson and Arizona were scrubbing in as Jackson noticed Arizona glancing at him repeatedly. After a minute of this, he could take no more. "Out with it Robbins," he said, looking at her cooly.

"I need to you talk to Meredith for me."

"Okay, what do you need to talk to her about?" He continued to scrub, looking straight ahead.

As Arizona finished scrubbing, she turned to Jackson and smiled sheepishly at him. "I need to know if Meredith wants to have kids with Alex."

Jackson turned to her, shock evident on his face. "What? I'm not asking her that! Why can't you ask her? Why do you even need to know that?"

She scoffed. "Well, maybe not those words, exactly. I just need to know how serious she is about him. Alex is my friend. I've mentored him. I've _raised_ him. I need to know he's not going to be hurt."

He studied her expression, and found it to be sincere. "You didn't say why you couldn't just ask her."

"Oh I could, I totally could. It's just...it's just that we're not close, and it would be, well, weird."

Jackson guffawed. "Oh, and it's _not_ weird for _me_?"

She appeard to be thinking about it. "Well, yeah, it is. It's weird. But it's more...acceptably weird."

Their conversation was stopped by the arrival of Meredith in the scrub room. She stood at the sink between Jackson and Arizona, but did not miss the looks passing between them. "Are we good here, or do you two need a minute?" her tone was a little flat, thanks to her tired state.

Arizona plastered on her smile. "Nope! We're good! We'll go get everything set." She entered the OR, Jackson right behind her. With them both turned away, they both missed Meredith's shoulders sag under the weight of her fatigue.

Minutes later, Meredith was repairing the girl's splenic rupture, while Arizona was looking for the rest of the internal bleeding. Jackson was suturing a large gash on the girl's head when Arizona leaned closer to him.

"Ask her," she whispered.

Jackson looked up at her over her mask. "No!" he whispered back.

"Ask her!" she repeated, a little more forcefully.

"I'm not doing that!" he whispered loudly.

"Somebody ask me whatever it is!" Meredith said in her best mom voice.

Arizona gave a puppy dog look to Jackson, who sighed, resigned to do her bidding.

"It's nothing, really, Mer," he stalled to concoct a ruse for his line of questioning. "I'm just really glad things seem to be going well between you and Alex. He's really changed, huh?" He caught the look from Arizona, which told him she wasn't that impressed with his question.

Meredith was silent while pndering this. "You only met him at the worst time of his lofe. He had just seen Izzie through cancer that should have killed her, surgery that _did_ kill her, albeit temporarily, and then she walked out on him after he had nursed her back to health. He is one of the best people I have ever known, even if it hasn't always appeared to be the case. He steps up, every time, and has gotten hurt, just about every time. But he doesn't quit. Alex keeps helping people, even when they don't deserve it." She smiled. "He's my home. So yes, he's changed. So have I. So have all of us. But Alex Karev...no one is better."

Arizona gave Jackson an unmistakable smile, visible even behind the surgical mask. She nodded, silently prodding him to continue his questioning, to ask the one question on her mind. He groaned, and then blurted, "Do you want to have kids with him?" He surprised even himself when the question tumbled forth. The silence in the OR was tangible and seemed to stretch on for hours, but was really just seconds.

Meredith raised her head to look at him. With the glow of the OR lights, neither Jackson nor Arizona noticed all of the color leave her face. "What? Why are you asking me that?" Her voice seemed odd, even to herself; it was strained and higher than usual.

Jackson shrugged, trying to come up with a reason for his strange question. "I don't know...I was just thinking about Harriet, and how happy she makes me, and then I thought about you and Alex, and well, the question just popped into my head."

Meredith was silent for several minutes, focusing on the operation. Jackson was begining to think that she was not going to answer when she suddenly began, quietly. "I was done. After Derek...I had my family. Zola, Bailey and Ellis were it for me." There was a lengthy pause, and Jackson gave Arizona shrug as if saying, 'I tried.'

Meredith continued, however, having been deep in thought. The smile in her voice was evident. "Alex is already such a good dad to my kids. Yeah, I'd like to have one or two with him."

Arizona's gaze met Jackson's, and both grinned at each other.

Meredith's voice snapped them out of their reverie. "Someone take off my mask!" They looked over in time to see the scrub nurse snatch her mask off as she emptied the contents of her stomach on the floor.

Concern clouded Arizona's face. "Meredith, are you okay?"

Meredith stood hunched over, her hands on her knees. "I'm...fine. Must have been something I ate."

Arizona wrinkled her nose. "No, you need to leave. I cannot bring a stomach bug home to Sofia."

Meredith caught her breath and straightened up. With her back turned to Arizona and Alex, her voice was even softer than before. Arizona almost missed her say, "I don't think it's anything you have to worry about," as she hurried out the door.

Arizona's look morphed from confused to shocked to ecstatic before she turned back to Jackson. "Did she just..."

Jackson mirrored her expression as he answered, "Yeah, I think she did!"


	64. Chapter 64

Part Two, Chapter Twenty Four

 **A/N: A deep, heart-felt thank you to all of you for sticking with me through my first foray into fan fiction. This story will always mean so much to me, being my first, and all of you will always hold a very special place in my heart! A special thanks goes out to Longclaw 1-6 for keeping me motivated and helping me through the rough spots. Your ideas have been most appreciated.**

 **I have decided to end the story with this chapter. There may be a sequel in the future, but I feel this story has reached it's end for now. Thank you again for putting up with the delays, and I hope you enjoy the end of their adventure…for now.**

Meredith hurried into the lounge, locking the door behind her. She walked over to the table, reached into her pocket and extracted a thin, white packet. She sunk down into the chair and took a deep breath. With trembling fingers, she extracted the contents of the packet. She looked straight ahead, inhaling deeply, and blew her breath out sharply to steady her nerves. Once centered, she shifted her gaze downward. Her breath caught, and time seemed to stand still as she read the word, "pregnant".

Instantly, she was sucked into a veritable maelstrom of emotions; elation, worry, excitement and terror competed as warring factions in her mind. She'd meant what she had said to Jackson and Arizona, she did want to have a child with Alex, but they had yet to even discuss the possibility. In retrospect, she realized how foolhardy that had been, but what was done was done. Would Alex even want a child of his own? He was great with kids, especially hers, but would a child of their own change things between them? She also wondered if her body could even handle another pregnancy. The last one was difficult, at best, and the delivery had been nearly fatal. Suddenly, an image of Alex cuddling a baby, _their baby,_ sprang into her mind, bringing with it the end of her insecurity. She needed to tell him as soon as possible!

She was roused from her reverie by a knock on the door. Quickly, she gathered herself and re-inserted the pregnancy test into its pouch before placing it back in the pocket of her scrubs. With another deep breath to calm her racing heart, she rose and strode to the door. She unlocked it, allowing Maggie to enter. Meredith was so caught up in her recent discovery that she missed the wistful smile on Maggie's face.

"Hey Mer, why was the door locked?"

"Oh, I guess I locked it," she replied, noncommittally. She didn't see the confused look that flashed momentarily across Maggie's face, nor did she notice Maggie attempting, and failing, to control her facial expressions. Her only thought was of telling Alex about their news. She was starting to feel restless keeping the news to herself.

Maggie turned to her cubby, busying herself to avoid making eye contact with Meredith. She was intently focused on making a show of looking for something, and nearly missed Meredith talking to her.

"Maggie, do you have a minute? I need to talk about something." Meredith decided to confide in Maggie as a way of trying out the news.

Maggie winced before turning to face Meredith. She quickly decided that she would run surgical procedures in her head in order to avoid giving away the surprise Alex had planned for her. "Sure, Mer. What's up?" She sat down at the table, running a CABG procedure through her mind, paying attention to every detail.

Meredith took a deep breath and began. "I have something to tell you, but you cannot tell anyone else. Can you keep a secret?"

Maggie was only half listening, deeply engrossed in the imaginary surgery she was performing. "Uh, sure. Of course I can."

"The thing is, I just found out some pretty big news, and I'm trying to figure out how to tell Alex."

Maggie was relaxed as she continued with her surgical imagery. "Oh, he'll be fine, Mer. Just tell him whatever it is."

"Well, we never really talked about this. I know we should have, obviously, or at least done something to prevent it, but I just never thought that this would happen."

"Uh-huh." Maggie now had her eyes closed as she ran the procedure.

"It's pretty stupid considering we're doctors and know how this happens…"

"Right, sure," Maggie continued to provide lip service.

"And I think he would be happy about it…"

"Yes, happy," Maggie murmured.

Meredith slapped her hand on the table. "You're right. What am I waiting for? I should just tell him! Thanks, Maggie, and remember don't say anything!"

Maggie looked up, jolted out of her reverie. "Uh, of course!" She chuckled halfheartedly. "Mums the word!"

Meredith stood quickly, grabbing her phone, and left the lounge.

"What just happened?" Maggie muttered.

Outside the lounge, Meredith was texting Alex, "I need to talk to you. Where are you?"

He texted back immediately. "I'm in the tunnels. Meet me here. I have something to talk to you about, too."

She smiled and headed off in the direction of the tunnels. As she walked, she thought about their early days in the tunnels, days where she did not like Alex, or herself, all that much. They had gotten to know each other in those tunnels; it was where their friendship had really begun. It seemed only fitting to her that she should give him their news in this same location. Her smile grew larger as she drew nearer to the tunnels. She thought back to when Ellis was born, and how Alex was her emergency contact. She remembered hearing the nurse mistakenly calling him her husband, and how good it felt to see him in the doorway. A sadness quickly overcame her, once again remembering how badly she had treated him that year, and how he refused to allow her to feel badly about it. She shook her head, once again wondering how she had gotten so lucky to have him in her life.

She turned the corner and her heart stopped. Candlelight streamed from every surface, white and silver balloons were gathered in groups with elegant ribbons streaming down. White lights hung from the ceiling, their light dancing along the walls. Even the gurneys were lined with white satin sheets gathered with wide white ribbon at the sides. And right in the midst of this was Alex, wearing the suit that he knew was her favorite on him.

Her hand flew to her mouth in shock at the sight before her. Her heart was beating wildly in her chest, and only intensified when Alex dropped to one knee. "Oh my God!" was all she could choke out.

Alex knelt before her. "Meredith, I've wanted to do this for a while now. I thought of all the places that I could do this in, and it was no contest. It had to be here. This is where we started our friendship. Where we had so many talks that led us down the road that eventually brought us here. I know you disagree, but I wasn't anyone worth knowing then. I thank God that you didn't see it that way. You knocked sense into me in more ways than one. You called me on my crap. Told me when I was being an ass."

He stepped forward and grasped her hands in his own. "You cared about me when I didn't give a damn about myself. You pulled me to my feet when I was down, and even more, you forgave me when I was at my worst." His eyes began to glaze over with unshed tears. "I don't know what I ever did to deserve you, Mer, but I swear to you that I will continue to work for the rest of my life to live up to be the man that you believe that I am. And I know that I can't do it without you. So, Meredith Grey, will you give me the unbelievable honor of being my wife?"

Tears streamed down Meredith's face, but before she could answer she turned from him and rushed to the nearest garbage can as another wave of nausea over took her. Alex rushed to her, concerned. "Mer, are you okay?"

After a minute, she nodded and sat down on the floor. Alex handed her a tissue to wipe her face and crouched down next to her on the floor, concern flooding his features. She looked at him through tear stained eyes. She chuckled when she saw the worry on his face. "I'm okay, Alex. Umm, it's actually what I wanted to talk to you about…." She let her words trail off as she looked at him expectantly.

He stared at her, and she watched his features morph from worry to confusion to realization, and finally to her great relief, euphoria. "Oh my God, Mer! You're…you're pregnant?"

She nodded as new tears fell. "Oh my God! You're having my baby!" He wrapped his arms around her and held her close as his own tears fell over his cheeks.

"So, you're okay with this?"

"Okay? Are you kidding? I'm more than okay with this! This is a dream come true. The woman I love more than anything is having my baby! The only thing that would make it better is if she would agree to marry me!"

Shock clouded her featured for a moment, as she just then realized she had not answered his question. "I'm so sorry! Yes, of course I'll marry you!" They both laughed through their tears, both amazed that their lives had brought them here to this place.

Alex reached into his pocket, extracted the black velvet box and opened it, revealing the ring he had selected for her. Meredith gasped, which earned her one of Alex's lopsided smiles that she loved so much. He took the ring out of the box and slipped it onto her finger before bringing her hand to his mouth and kissing it.

"I love you, Meredith Grey."

Meredith sniffled through her tears. "And I love you, Alex Karev."

The end…for now…


End file.
